Today, My 5 year old sister informed me she had left me a present in my bed. She had tied a ribbon around a dead rat's neck and propped it up on my pillow. The label says his name was Bert. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my cat died. But, before he could bite the dust, he left a goodbye present on my bed: a decapitated baby rabbit. FML
Today, I discovered why there was such a horrible stench in my bedroom. My cat had a secret stash of shit under my dresser. Along with the carcass of a rat. FML
Today, I woke up to several dead snails and worms all over my bed. I guess that's what my little sister meant yesterday when she said I'd be sorry for not letting her play on my phone. FML
Today, I was laying in bed when my sister came running in, scared. I took my bat and went into the kitchen where the suspicious noise was coming from. It was a rat, right in the middle of the floor. I jumped on the counter and shrieked, just as my girlfriend walked in, who then actually dealt with it. FML
Today, I made my way to bed around 4am after spending all night hanging out with my family. When I got to my bed, I started to clear a spot to lay down. Almost immediately, my hand touched something furry and cold and, fearing the worst, I turned the light on. Turns out my cat left me a half eaten rodent. FML
Today, my sister gave my laptop away and dumped a pile of her hamster's turds on my bed. All of this because I flushed the toilet while she was in the shower last night. FML
Today, my dog showed me her latest kill. Too bad it was the stuffed animals my dead grandmother had given me as a child that had a lot of sentimental value to me. FML
Today, my 9 year-old little sister is coming back to town with the rest of my family. She specifically asked me to feed her fish. I totally forgot until she called me 10 minutes ago to tell me she was on her way home and couldn't wait to see her fishie. He's dead. FML
Today, my brother in law brought a dead rabbit to my nephew saying, "I found the Easter Bunny!" My nephew started crying hours ago and hasn't stopped. FML
Today, I accidentally left my sister's hamster's cage open and it escaped. My dad recently put mouse traps down. Guess where I found her. FML
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Top comments
Your_Shadow 0
Your sister is awesome.
AndelleRae 9
Aw, how thoughtful. :) Seriously though? Sleep with one eye open.
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Comments (117)
Niqi 0
HAHAHAHA you're sister is hilarious. XD
Moemoemoe_fml 0
It's funny how everybody is all "aww / I love your sister / how funny and cute" to this FML, while everybody was "he's a psycho! / he's the devil himself / kill him or send him away to an insane asylum!!" to the FML with the little brother who killed his hamster because he didn't have friends... Sure, she's a bit younger then the boy in the other FML and probably meant no harm, plus there's no indication that she killed the rat (most likely just found it dead), but the huge difference in the assumptions in the comments between those 2 FMLs is strange/amusing. I mean no insult to your sister, OP, I'm sure she just didn't realize the WTFery of her present choice. ^^; Or, maybe, it's like I said in response to 14, and she's actually a cat. XD That would explaina lot. *lol*
bubs_AKA_vermin 0
I concur.
jeremy78tn 0
I think its BS personally. What kind of 5 year old would go thru all this with a dead rat?
x0aka0x 0
pretty sure it was alive when your sister tied the ribbon around the rats neck
stringoffail 0
Some people will click YDI on anything. Lame. I would've named the rat Dave.
whiteblackman 0
i agree with #!. i have 3 sisters and im not showiing them this story lol. im trying to stay present free
baileys82 0
while i do think that is awesome, i think she needs some therapy.
kaelendra 0
time for her to see a shrink especially if she killed it too and didn't just find it though finding it I just one step closer to killin one for next time. what's next... a dog or cat? then maybe a kid? then murdering spree of adults too?
irrelevantxx 0
That's ******* gross, lmfao.
souldrifter 0
Strangely, I hope the thing was dead of natural causes before she put it in your bed. Thinking that it might've been alive and then choked to death by the ribbon makes me want to cry. Talk to your parents and get that kid some help either way.
buddy51 23
Wonder what she did with Ernie?