Today, my 15-year-old son got so enraged at a fly that kept harassing him, that he ended up slapping himself in the face as it flew by him. This caused him to fall out of his chair, at which point he broke down into a mess of tears, humiliating me in front of everyone. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after twelve straight hours of work, my fourteen year old son surprised me with a broken window and a cracked TV. He said, "I was swatting away a fly." FML
Today, my son tried to swat a fly with a hammer. Our apartment walls are now littered with dents and holes. FML
Today, my young son and I were in line at Subway. I guess he got bored and started to insult the teenage girl behind us. I tried to get him to stop, but he wouldn't listen. Eventually the girl punched him in the face and left. As my son cried uncontrollably, everyone else there clapped. FML
Today, two days after losing my temper with my smart mouthed 7 year-old son and slapping him across the face, I tried to apologize by buying him a treat and telling him if anyone found out, I would get in trouble. Today, I got a call from social services about the "bruise" on his face. FML
Today, I accused my son of faking being sick. He then blew chunks all over me. FML
Today, during a heated argument with my son, I lost my temper and called him a son of a bitch. He enthusiastically agreed. FML
Today, I walked into my son's room only to be attacked by a swarm of flies. I'm afraid to go back in there. FML
Today, during a family game of basketball, my 15 year old son shoved me hard to get the ball. I fell and cut my arm badly on the ground. I yelled at him for being an idiot. He replied "Oh jeez, a bleeding woman being a bitch, what a fucking shocker." My husband doubled over laughing. FML
Today, my 2-year-old son put his hand on my face, gave me a sweet kiss, and put his cheek against mine. Then he slapped me hard enough to leave a mark, laughed, and scrambled away. FML
Today, my son got a beating. Apparently, he went to a club, waited until he saw a couple of girls pulling a duckface for a photo, then rushed over and threw pieces of bread at them. Their boyfriends, not too surprisingly, didn't appreciate this. I had to drive the idiot home from the hospital. FML
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Top comments
Redoxx_fml 22
Fly: 1 Son: 0
ImSteve 8
Fail. Everyone makes mistakes though.
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Comments (145)
zoeeileen 6
how did I read this as "today, my 15 year old son got married to a fly"... lack of sleep does weird things.
alarmist 2
What kind of father speaks that way? Poor kid...
kalbrek009 20
No, your son did not humiliate you...you did that to yourself just now with the posting your FML showing what a self centered, heartless moron you can be with regards toward YOUR SONS actual humiliation by believing it was yours instead....why must everything be about you? Lol
therealdemon 1
If this isn't fake you deserve every bit of embarrassment. You are extremely selfish. He was the kid with the fly and embarrassent. I would be embarrassed to have you as a parent.
echosong 16
goddamn flies
mrwafflelover 4
Probably a gay kid
Bcfrmkc816 17
Humiliate you?? How do you think he feels? He going to be thinking about that for awhile and hopefully laugh at it later in life.
anyoldnamewilldo 23
Maybe instead of being a jerk dad, you talk to him. For that kind of overreaction it seems there is more going on. There is a chance that he is depressed or is being bullied. Considering you seem kind of like a bully yourself, it wouldn't be surprising. How about actually being a caring parent?
lovableashley01 2
you should think about your son and not him embarrasing you
dmcd_39 14
Ydi for having a son