Noname
Canada
Today, I won $5000 dollars from a lottery ticket and tried giving the man next to me a high five. He had no hands. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
steveinnewsoh
United States
Today, I went to get a scratch off lottery ticket, and the dude in front of me got the same one I was going to get. He won 500 dollars. I got 2 bucks. FML
loss.jpg
Seattle, United States
Poker face at all times
Today, I got a scratcher lottery ticket, scratched it in the store, and won $5,000! I screamed and danced around. The guy next to me shoved me over, yanked the ticket from my hands, and tore ass out the door. The cops couldn't find him. FML
Anonymous
Canada
Today, I scratched a lottery ticket I had gotten for my birthday and won $10,000. In celebration, I jumped up and raised my hands directly into a ceiling fan. Oh, and it was a fake ticket. FML
Anonymous
Hagersville, Canada
Today, I won $50 on the lottery. On the subway home, I checked my pocket to see if the money was still there. A very professional man in a suit yelled, "Hey, that's mine!" I got several dirty glares. I'm such a pathetic wimp that I gave him the money. FML
AJShow80
United States
Today, I won 20 dollars on a lotto scratch off. My friend, pissed, makes me split the money, saying it was collateral for the gas money used to get us there. He then used his 10 dollars on a scratch off, and won 500 dollars. The jackass wouldn't split it. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, my Dad called me to tell me that he had finally won the lottery and that I no longer had to worry about trying to find a way to pay for school. I was so excited I started crying. He then told me that he won $5 on a scratch off lotto ticket. He bought a sandwich. Funny dad. FML
BigMoney
United States
Today, behind a cabinet, I found a scratch-off lottery ticket I hadn't scratched yet. After scratching it off, I realized it's a $2,500 winner. The lottery commission won't accept it because they stopped using that game 2 years ago. FML
Dumbass
Idiot tax
Today, my boyfriend came home, complaining about not having enough money for bills. He then pulled a stack of lottery tickets out of his bag, saying, "I hope one of these wins." FML
anonymous
United States
Today, I won the lottery. My ex-girlfriend has the ticket. I just broke up with her. FML
Dora
Canada
Today, I won 10,555 dollars on scratch cards! My sister got me to do a happy dance and filmed it. The video is on facebook and the tickets were fake. FML
Top comments
mellowyellowww 0
i hope you gave him the money to buy himself some hands. but i bet you didn't. selfish.
cbahh 0
This made me laugh for 3 whole minutes.
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Comments (74)
twignig 0
**** your life? you're $5000 richer asshole.
ILoveMyXbox 0
ye
ohjesusreally 0
bahahaha. favorite.
cbahh 0
This made me laugh for 3 whole minutes.
chuckles 0
LMFAO i hate that i'm laughing at this but how RANDOM!?!? just try to imagine that!
mizled 0
xD Five grand richer ad slightly embarrassed. wow, I FEEL you PAIN
egaonogenki 0
Dude, how do handless men wipe after being in the restroom?!?!? Anyway, see Ryan high-five the blind guy here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k4AHHVT58NE
kindofgocrazy 0
Umm, rip the toilet paper with your feet/mouth (ew), and put it on the edge of the toilet, and rub your butt on it, then push it into the toilet with your shoe. Or prosthetics could probably work.
Enoch134 0
lol he uses a hook hahaha
aaryn_indigo 0
okay, this is actually freaking hilarious. i laughed out loud.
Superman8_fml 0
this is TOOOOtally made up. for sure
tbeaun 0
**** YOU. I'LL BET YOUR MOTHER HATES YOU.
pewp 5
i declare shenanigans