Today, I woke up to a small fire on my roof, burning up small twigs and branches. The cause? Last night, I threw a sparkling firecracker up very high, only to have it blown onto my roof by the wind. It's going to take $2,000 to fix the damage. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my house caught on fire. After it was put out, I realized the damage wasn't bad, mainly smoke damage. I went to my parents' for the night because my house smelled. While there, I received a phone call from my neighbor. Apparently, my house caught fire again. It's now a pile of ashes. FML
Today, to save money, I wanted to fix my own leaky roof instead of hiring someone. When I got on the roof, the ladder fell. As it was falling, it broke three windows and snagged the siding of my house ripping over half of it off. FML
Today, an idiot decided it would be fun to light up a firecracker in front of our house. It ended with firetrucks, a black yard, and yet somehow the weeds survived. FML
Today, I was at a fire roasting marshmallows. When mine caught on fire, I pulled it back so I could blow out the flames. It flew off the stick, and, still flaming, landed on my face. FML
Today, some idiots set off fireworks close to my house. I was a bit worried, but my uncle assured me it would be fine and left to run an errand. Just minutes later, I looked up to find the tree right next to my wooden balcony engulfed in flames. FML
Today, I was standing on the patio when one of my upstairs neighbors threw a cigarette butt over the balcony. It landed on my head and burned some of my hair. FML
Today, I had to call 911. Why? My fireplace caught on fire. FML
Today, I decided to light a candle in my room. Since fire intrigues me, I put an old brochure into it. Paper burns fast, and now my carpet has a big, black burn mark. FML
Today, I woke up thinking my house was on fire because I could hear crackling flames downstairs. I panicked and tripped out of bed. It was the fireplace channel I left on last night so I could wake up to a Christmas ambiance. FML
Today, our roof collapsed due to water damage. I had saved the money to get the roof fixed months ago, but my wife saw a scare story about gas stoves and demanded we spend the money getting every gas-powered appliance ripped out and replaced. That new HVAC system will work great in a condemned house. FML
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Top comments
lostcrazydiamond 10
Common sense isn't so common.
IconicLemon 8
I bet $2000 you wont do it again.
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Comments (79)
perdix 31
And this is why setting off fireworks indoors is epic and memorable . . . and smart!
female_troller 12
Smart? Until your house catches on fire.
TheWorldGreatest 8
Very smart !
scubaairpig 7
You just short of shooting bottle rockets from you butt. Way to go
Ozuru 11
-cough- natural selection -cough-
perdix 31
The OP ought to have a fight to the death with the glass-eating cat. The stupidity of at least one of them will improve their respective gene pools.
poccocurantes 7
And why does everything cost $2000 now?
DanielleinDC 34
Unless the glass-eating cat was spayed/neutered.
outoftown 27
Or OP had his/her tubes tied.
AaronGuy 12
Neither OP nor the glass-cat should ever procreate. Fortunately, most pet cats, or at least the ones I know, are required to be spayed/neutered. Unfortunately, the same cannot be said for idiots, although it should be.
insaneDONUTZ 15
why would you even do that?
paulpings 6
Yep! Ydi! Better your own roof than some poor neighbour! Finally! One of them shafted themselves
paulpings 6
Yep! Ydi! At least you trashed your own roof than some poor neighbour who if it had of been I bet you would have not owned up to if you thought you could get away with it - like the douche that hits a car in a car park and drives away hoping no-one saw!
WaywardDaughter 26
If you've been drinking and play with fireworks...you're gonna have a bad time!
transcedental 18
The roof, the roof, the roof is on fire ...
zack11289 3
We don't need no water, let the ************ burn
DanielleinDC 34
Burn, ************, burn.
olpally 33
Way to go, stupid. You sound like Peter griffin from family guy and this is a clip from a future episode. HOW STUPID CAN YOU BE??? Lol, oh yeah, Ydi.