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Kingspin Canada

Today, I woke up to a beautiful sunrise, the smell of bacon in a frying pan, and some dickhead trying to pick the lock on my front door. FML

162

Kingspin tells us more.

Kingspin 0

...How would I explain the third degree burns and traces of bacon grease? And he ran off luckily.

Collection

Halloween

A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.

Top comments

UTTU 0

Let him go to sleep hearing the sound of a 12 gauge.

underpaid011 0

open the door then splash the very hot bacon grease on the asshole. then say "pick that mother ******" and for good measure kick him square in the sack, then in the face and ribs. then call the cops. don't forget to say "i was terrified!! I thought the guy was going to break in and kill me!!". blame the face and rib injuries on him "falling down".

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Comments (162)

AKALurch 0

how is it an FML??? did u do anything about it or did u just sit there nd think " this is a good FML, I'll let it happen"

bigbadtim 7

Dump the bacon grease on him.

LTHoratioCaine 4

how would he make bacon if hes still picking the lock, whered the bacon comefrom?

Mercury03 13

What about the belly bacon?

jorrrk 0

he probally wanted some bacon ya should of gave him some cheapscape

Rdozer 0

Dang, that bacon must have smelled GOOOD!

kingjames2306 0

he was gonna do a B.E. and leave something in your house.------ Dane Cook

FarSide 23

Bacon & Entering? Is that a crime?

shadowmodder 0

Wooooo what did u do

MyNameIsBruce 0

11-Hahahaha! Way to go Doc!