Today, I woke up after a long night of drinking with my friends. I vaguely remembered visiting a tattoo parlour, but nothing prepared me for the sight of the words "YOLO" and "MOFO" tattooed across the fingers of my left and right hands. Now I'm officially a bandwagoning douchebag. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got piss drunk. Being a tattoo artist, I came to the intoxicated conclusion that I could save much more money doing my own tattoos on myself. I now have my ex-boyfriend's name permanently on my thigh. It's not even spelled right. FML
Today, I was looking at tattoos and fell in love with a really cool looking one, so I decided to get it. I later showed it to a friend who is a cop. He informed me that it is a gang tattoo. I think I just put a target on my ankle. FML
Today, I showed off my new tattoo to my friends. Too bad it says "Walk Earless" now instead of "Walk Fearless." That's right, I'm now supporting Van Gogh. FML
Today, I went out drinking with my tattoo artist brother-in-law. I was so wasted that I agreed to let him try working on me. I woke up with a tattoo of an animated marijuana plant smoking a cigarette. This'll look just great when I'm defending clients in court. FML
Today, I realized that the "holla" tattoo I stupidly got on my lower lip five years ago isn't fading as I expected it to, and will probably contribute to my unemployment for years to come. FML
Today, I was struggling through small-talk at a party where I knew nobody. Tattoos came up and I started talking about trendy, girly tattoos like feathers, anchors and infinity signs with stupid words in them. Turns out the girl I was talking to had all three. FML
Today, I woke up to the faint memory of being drunk enough to draw dicks on my own face in permanent marker. FML
Today, I woke up with a massive hangover after passing out at a wild party the night before. Apparently my friends couldn't find a marker, because I woke up with dozens of dicks drawn on my body and face in henna. I have a job interview today. FML
Today, I found out the tattoo symbolising my marriage turned out to be more permanent than the marriage itself. FML
Today, I found out that the phrase I got tattooed on my lower back is misspelled. FML
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Top comments
ICastillo 25
Damn you should kick your own ass for that shit
mashimarox 12
Idiot.
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Comments (233)
luvscomplic8ed 6
Hahaha oh the fun of being drunk
hkittyfreak 4
You cannot get a tattoo drunk it's really not recommended because you will bleed alot I'm surprised they didn't turn you down
kimdougherty13 0
Love it! My biggest fear.. Lol
shrdlu 28
Getting drunk is fun because you never know what will happen!
chick92282 15
Tattoo artist shouldn't have touched you, especially if you were so intoxicated as to not remember being there. Pick the scabs as much as you can to try to pull some of the ink out, get some Wrecking Balm (dunno if they have it where you are, but it's an otc cream that's supposed to destroy tattoo ink) and maybe find some new friends. Why they'd let you get tattoos while drunk, and on your hands no less, is beyond me. Other than that, all I can say is good luck and stay the hell away from whatever you were drinking from now on.
For_Real_Deal 0
That's what happens when you get drunk!
JustAGuy107 0
Now you get to go through the fun process of getting a tatoo removed. Hurts.
SqueakyChipmunk 22
**** that, I'm burning my hands OFF.
OfficeNinja 5
Yes you are. You are a bandwagon douchebag for life!
alynarodriguez57 0
Well, YOLO.!!!
rachel_potter 13
Thankfully knuckle tattoos wear off quickly, then you can get them lasered off. :)
blackwidowtaco 31
That sounds so ******* painful.