Today, I woke up after a long night of drinking with my friends. I vaguely remembered visiting a tattoo parlour, but nothing prepared me for the sight of the words "YOLO" and "MOFO" tattooed across the fingers of my left and right hands. Now I'm officially a bandwagoning douchebag. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got piss drunk. Being a tattoo artist, I came to the intoxicated conclusion that I could save much more money doing my own tattoos on myself. I now have my ex-boyfriend's name permanently on my thigh. It's not even spelled right. FML
Today, I was looking at tattoos and fell in love with a really cool looking one, so I decided to get it. I later showed it to a friend who is a cop. He informed me that it is a gang tattoo. I think I just put a target on my ankle. FML
Today, I showed off my new tattoo to my friends. Too bad it says "Walk Earless" now instead of "Walk Fearless." That's right, I'm now supporting Van Gogh. FML
Today, I went out drinking with my tattoo artist brother-in-law. I was so wasted that I agreed to let him try working on me. I woke up with a tattoo of an animated marijuana plant smoking a cigarette. This'll look just great when I'm defending clients in court. FML
Today, I realized that the "holla" tattoo I stupidly got on my lower lip five years ago isn't fading as I expected it to, and will probably contribute to my unemployment for years to come. FML
Today, I was struggling through small-talk at a party where I knew nobody. Tattoos came up and I started talking about trendy, girly tattoos like feathers, anchors and infinity signs with stupid words in them. Turns out the girl I was talking to had all three. FML
Today, I woke up to the faint memory of being drunk enough to draw dicks on my own face in permanent marker. FML
Today, I woke up with a massive hangover after passing out at a wild party the night before. Apparently my friends couldn't find a marker, because I woke up with dozens of dicks drawn on my body and face in henna. I have a job interview today. FML
Today, I found out the tattoo symbolising my marriage turned out to be more permanent than the marriage itself. FML
Today, I found out that the phrase I got tattooed on my lower back is misspelled. FML
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Top comments
ICastillo 25
Damn you should kick your own ass for that shit
mashimarox 12
Idiot.
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Comments (233)
ppl2ppl 4
Aww I feel you I ******* hate YOLO.....unless for when it stands for You Only Like Oreos!!! :D bahaha yum cookies nomnomnom
cubbi54 6
Well I guess you only live once mother ******!
infectedsense 15
You did deserve it for being an idiot, but yeah, any tattoo studio that will work on someone visibly drunk should be shut down. It's actually physically dangerous too since alcohol thins the blood.
karlag2689 3
hey you only live once right ??
Jirekianu2 19
That tattoo artist is a dick. They're supposed to refuse to do a tattoo on an intoxicated person. But you're still a dumb shit.
mrsayuso 0
Don't give yourself that much credit honey. By referring to yourself as a douche bag would imply you could get near a ******. That is something that will probably not happen with that tattoo. Sorry.
blairrogers03 0
YOLO
sxdryv 14
You do realize u can sue the tattoo artist for doing that while you were obviously intoxicated right?
lilmissroxtar 1
CWhat does mofo mean??? Srry i really dont know and wow that does suck
blackwidowtaco 31
Means ************.
Kev1878Mc 4
Quit booze, you clearly can't limit yourself to stop while you still have some idea of what's going on. That can be really dangerous.