Today, I woke 2 hours before my alarm was supposed to go off, feeling incredibly sick. I then ran downstairs and had diarrhea while I threw up. I spent Valentine's Day having diarrhea every time I coughed or sneezed. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had a cold and was vomiting. I sneezed really hard, smacking my nose onto the toilet seat. I woke up a few minutes later with my nose bleeding, painful, and still stuffy. FML
Today, I was suffering from food poisoning and had constant diarrhea, along with feeling nauseous. I couldn't hold my vomit in and rushed to the toilet, but due to the pressure, I pooped while still in pajamas. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were finally able to settle on having a day out together after putting it off for months because of work/other random reasons. This morning I woke up with the worst case of diarrhea I’ve ever had in my life. I won’t be leaving the bathroom anytime soon. FML
Today, I had a terrible stomach bug. I quickly jumped off the toilet and crouched over the bowl. I vomited with such force that I splashed the shitty water back into my face. FML
Today, I woke up in the middle of the night feeling sick. I went to the bathroom and knelt in front of the toilet, waiting to throw up. When I finally did, I violently shit my pants at the same time. I was at my friend's house. FML
Today, I returned to work after celebrating the New Year in Mexico. I wasn't feeling well, but didn't want to call in sick after already taking a vacation. Now I'm at work with diarrhea, and trotting to the bathroom every 30 minutes. My commute home usually takes around an hour. FML
Today, I was very sick and kept throwing up. I took a shower after every time I threw up. While in the shower after I threw up, I had to throw up again, so I got out and ran to the toilet. I slipped on the tile, broke my nose on the floor, and then threw up. FML
Today, I woke up with the flu that causes me to throw up violently until I dry heave and can't breathe. I told my mom I would rather have the runs, and not even a minute later, I got them. So now if I move too fast, I throw up, and if I don't move fast enough, I shit myself. FML
Today, I had food poisoning. I spent all day on the can. I also had a bucket to throw up into at the same time. I was sick out of both ends, at the same time. FML
Today, I started feeling sick to my stomach. I tried to soothe it with some Ramen, which helped for a while. Later on, I felt worse and threw up the soup. Noodles came out of my nose. FML
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Top comments
allmidnighteyes 11
I got the magic in me. Every time I sneeze, I shit violently. Magic, magic, magiiic. Magic, magic, magiiic.
Mirorbo 27
Darling, if it was coming from both ends, it was probably food poisoning. Don't quote me on that though, I'm just speaking from experience.
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Comments (44)
suzy_q_9 0
omg! i about had the exact same situation happen to me. Except instead of having diarrhea and vomiting, i had diarrhea and the h1n1.
bran_d1986 0
2 words. Adult. Diapers. fyl
Fmlmaster14 0
well you werent the only one. /:
cbarker7 0
I had the same thing, except on my birthday a couple weeks ago. I was told it's noro irus and seems to be going around. Make sure to disinfect everyhing because you can reinfect yourself! Good luck.
greentea1242 3
I was horribly sick valentines day too :/
crazysoccer 0
maybe learn how to spell diarrhoea too? haha
dbt88 15
. . . OP's from Wisconsin which uses Americanized English. It is spelled correctly. I don't know how anyone else says it, but everyone around here pronounces it just like it's spelled, too - not as "oe."
dbt88 15
Unless of course I missed it and it was spelled incorrectly before and changed. Nevermind if that is the case.
blink831forever 13
That sucks OP. I'm sorry.
sensboltsfan84 4
I feel bad for you. I spent Valentines last year sick, so I know how you feel. We spent 3 nights in a romantic hotel, with me running to the bathroom every half hour. I feel your pain :(
k9obsessed 5
Oh god, that sounds horrible...You poor thing. If it were me I'd have been crying out of misery. FYL, and I hope you get better soon.
ofwglui 0
roses really smell like boo boo boo!!