Today, I went to the movies with my boyfriend, and ended up sitting next to this girl who wouldn't stop sneezing. Grossed out, I asked my boyfriend if we could switch seats. After doing so, the girl immediately stopped sneezing and started flirting with him. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was on a date with a girl and everything was going great. As I took her back to her house and walked her to her door, I leaned in for a kiss. She seemed to really enjoy it, so I went for another but as I leaned in again, I sneezed uncontrollably, shooting her face with saliva and snot. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend to the movies. She's pretty conservative and I decided after four dates to give her her first ever kiss. As I leaned in she violently sneezed and hit me in the nose with the hand she brought up to cover her face. I broke my nose and got blood down her cleavage. FML
Today, I was sitting in a theater waiting for the movie to start when a hot guy sat next to me. Trying to impress him, I made seemingly witty comments to my friend throughout the movie. When it ended, he loudly complained to his friends about the 'annoying girl' sitting next to him. FML
Today, despite having a mild case of the flu, I visited my boyfriend's house and watched a movie with his parents. During the movie, I felt the sudden urge to sneeze. Trying to hold it in, I managed to do the loudest fart I've ever done in my life. Everyone heard. FML
Today, I went to the movies with my boyfriend. He went to get popcorn and I went to the bathroom. Thinking he had got back before me, I sat down next to him in the theater. I leaned in to kiss him, then realized it was some 70-year-oldish woman. FML
Today, I went to the movies. A really cute girl sat beside me. I tried to strike up a conversation with her until she turned to look at me and I realized he was a guy. I couldn't even finish the movie because I felt his judging eyes burn holes into me the entire time. FML
Today, a woman got on the bus wearing extremely strong perfume and sat in the seat in front of me. The gentleman I was sitting next to began violently sneezing, so much so that he eventually sneeze-vomited all over my lap and backpack. FML
Today, I was working at the theater as an usher. A man came up to me and gave me his ticket. At the same time, he took a sip of water and suddenly felt the need to sneeze. The water came out from his nose and landed all over my face. I was covered with his mucus and had to wish him a good movie. FML
Today, I worked up the courage at lunch to sit next to the girl I've been in love with for 3 years. Everything was going great. That is, until I sneezed and my retainer shot out my mouth, and landed in her lap. FML
Today, I was making out with a guy I really like. Midway through, he stopped and said he had to sneeze. After waiting several seconds, he said the urge went away and we kept making out. Ten seconds later, he violently sneezed in my open mouth. FML
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Top comments
asiancosmo 7
trifling ho
xxmuzicfreakxx 5
Well if he was a good boyfriend, he would've told her to shut up and watch the movie.
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Comments (173)
Llamacod 11
So..., how was The Hunger Games?
cmanaus 3
I don't know how I'm the only one to give a thumbs up to your comment. That was amazing.
Leewannabe 10
I thought so too! I'm so looking forward to see it myself!
SignUpisntcool 3
I actually saw it today and it was great!
theonlysweetpea 10
From the moment she started sneezing her feelings would have been hurt. I have a slight case of germaphobia
Pandacupcakelove 26
What a bitch! Well hopefully a little flirting won't steal away your boyfriend...
batummshakalaka 1
That's the type of girl I call a troll.
SHAMUS_the_WITTY 18
A girl tried that once on me... Of course, she was only so-so, and my girlfriend was amazingly attractive, so I ignored her. I was 15, my girlfriend was 17, and this girl was like 14. I had to pretty much hold my girlfriend back so she didn't get us thrown out. She was fuming for like 2 weeks afterwards.
xStaciexLynnx 15
If your girlfriend was 17 and the other girl was 'like 14' your girlfriend has got issues to feel threatened and be pissed for 2 weeks.
kimby618 0
Beat a bitches ass!
SebastianG 2
Kick her ass
psych10 4
So, she got up when you got up? Then followed both of you to another seat, then started flirting with him? You said WE switched seats. That seems like a lot of trouble
Lilstephie 6
I think what she means is that she swapped seats with her bf so he took her seat next to the annoying girl, not that they both got up and moved away.
kristat 14
I think she meant "we switched seats" as in she took her boyfriend's seat and he took hers. If I was sitting next to someone who was grossing me out I wouldn't ask the person I was with to sit next to them either... I'd either deal with it, or move altogether or just leave.
Monsterchevy 0
i woulda killed a bitch! thats just down right low, hoes these days omg
MaddySwaggedUp 0
That sounds like something I would do.