Today, I went to get a facial. I forgot my contact case so I put them into paper cup. My beautician thought it was leftover water from someone else, and threw my only pair of vision aid away. I scuttled home half blind. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I opened my new contact lenses for the first time in a month and accidentally dropped one, only to watch it disappear helplessly down the drain. Give a name to the situation. FML
Today, I got into the shower with my glasses on by mistake. I spent 5 minutes convinced that the fog in my vision was me going blind. FML
Today, I was using the restroom at work when my glasses slipped off my face and landed right in the toilet. FML
Today, after an extremely hard day at work, I took a hot shower to wind down a little bit. I accidentally splashed a painful amount of hot water and shampoo in my eyes. My left contact is now stuck to my eyeball. FML
Today, I woke up hungover and thirsty, I found a glass of water next to the sink, filled it up with more water, chugged it and went back to bed. I woke up an hour later to my best friend telling me she thought she lost her contacts. They were in a glass next to the sink. I ate her contacts. FML
Today, I went to go soak my dentures because I fell asleep wearing them last night, only to find that my boyfriend threw away the container they were in, thinking it was trash. FML
Today, I wore a pair of glasses with no lenses because I thought I'd look smarter. I ended up poking myself in the eye several times, leaving it swollen. So much for making me look smarter. FML
Today, I bought an eye mask to help me sleep during the day, as I work night shifts. Upon waking up after my first time using it, I forgot I was wearing it and thought I had gone blind, causing me to fall out of the bed and split my head open on my bedside table. FML
Today, I brought home my 3D glasses after a movie. I had a laugh about it until I realized that I put my $100 sunglasses in the recycle box outside of the theatre instead. FML
Today, I inadvertently gave passers by the middle finger as I tried to stop my glasses from sliding off my face. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
urdirtyolduncle 15
I guess you didn't see that coming!
ScaryyMary 14
Scuttled? You scuttled? What are you, a crab?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (116)
blarghonk117 0
lol. getting a facial.
Jasmine143 0
Why'd You Need To Take Them Out For A Facial?
kibbleskid911 0
Lol
FistFightingJesu 0
I'll give you a facial. ;)
bugmenotmofo 34
I stoped at " Today, I went to get a facial" :D
iNekoGamergurl 0
Lol>_<
takemewithy0u 0
I hope you didn't drive!
RavenNight 0
eh, ppl make mistakes
imac619 2
I don't know how to vote on this one...it sucks to be blind and have to scuttle home....but it's not like you don't have a voice and could have told her what was in the cup, instead of just assuming everyone knows your about your sight problem.....tell me how to vote fml website....
GrandTheftPants 0
Dr. Zoidberg...is that you?
SirEBC 7
Is that baby being sacrificed?
vodkaliciouz 4
50 - lmao
AnagenisisZagus 13
Well, boo ******' hoo, babycakes. Ain't you shit outta luck, eh? Dummy.
cul8r 4
So, the option of getting the cup back out of the trashcan is nonexistent? You can wash and disinfect them, you know... Or did they put them in the shredder?
cul8r 4
But since they were in the cup and the OP noticed right away that the cup was thrown away, I think it's valid to assume that they can be saved. On the other hand, I have no need of glasses or contacts, therefore I have no experience in that field.