Today, I went out to dinner. The waiter was pretty cute. He greets us, "Hi my name is... (long pause) Jordan." Thinking he was flirting, I quickly smart back, "Are you confused?" He says, "No actually, I have a stutter." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my friend fixed me up with a guy from her workplace. I'm painfully shy, so I really appreciated it and was looking forward to meeting him, since she described him as very sweet. Once the date got started, he continuously made fun of my speech impediment, until I finally left in tears. FML
Today, I went to a restaurant with some friends. I noticed a very cute waitress about my age, so I walked over to her and asked if she had a boyfriend. The extremely fit, attractive waiter standing next to her immediately turned, held out his hand and goes, "Yeah. Meet me." FML
Today, while on a blind date at Hooters, I ordered my food and the waitress asked me if I was stoned, because she couldn't understand me. I have a speech impediment. FML
Today, I went out to eat with my girlfriend. The waiter came up and was being nice. He said, "What can I get you two gentlemen?" FML
Today, I was at McDonald's. I bumped into a guy, and as I was helping him pick up his food, I realized he was cute. I began smiling and I was about to introduce myself, when he began laughing and said, "It's you! I've heard about you!" He left laughing. I still don't know who he is, or what made him laugh. FML
Today, I was out to dinner with a friend I had a crush on. The whole time, he was flirting with the waitress while I was trying to get him to notice me. When we got the check, he looked at her and said, "She's not my girlfriend, I only go out with pretty girls. So, can I have your number?" FML
Today, I went on a lunch date with a guy I used to work with. When the conversation got dry, I asked him if he went by “Chris” or “Christopher” these days. His name is Daniel. My brain knew my mistake as I said it. Just when I thought the silence couldn’t get more awkward. FML
Today, I thought I'd finally make a step towards getting over my ex-fiancé by flirting with a cute waiter. I left him a note on the bill. He comes back, says "which one of you is [name]?" and leans down close to me to say, "Thanks for your note, but your card was declined." FML
Today, my crush took me out to lunch. When the waiter came for our orders he ordered onoin rings and looks at me and says, "I won't be kissing anyone tonight anyways." FML
Today, I bumped into a really cute guy I know. I stuttered and floundered, before saying, "Hi, it's me, Megan Thomas." My surname isn't Thomas, but his is. FML
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Top comments
amoureaux 0
i don't get it, how did you think he was flirting??
thuryn 2
You worry too much. This sort of thing happens to *him* every day, all day. Just don't make a big deal out of it, and he'll appreciate it. "Oh! I thought you were flirting! *smile* So what's good here?" That's all it takes. Problem solved.
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Comments (106)
hellFighter 0
YDI for thinking you were cute enough for him to flirt with.
fueledbyamy 0
the way he said it could have been flirting. its hard to explain it in words. but i can see what she meant by the pause= flirting. ouch, poor thing. you weren't to know i guess.
SilentGround 0
i thought he was about to give you the name of a coworker. now how did you think he was flirting? nonetheless, this is when you should apologize, bury your face in your hands for looking like a moron, and proceed to leave. oh life.
Aethren 0
This is how I met my wife of 11 years, she came to eat and I paused before saying my name and she asked If I was confused.
nubnut5 0
I dont think its called stuterring.
RPGod 0
#47: Some people with a stutter will pause before they say a word that is hard for them to pronounce. I do it sometimes. You deserved that. You need to observe somebody before you say something like that
jdb2009 0
OP: you're not smart, not at all. #6 - 04/18/2009 at 11:20am by thuryn: **** this bitch, OP don't take this advice, have a little more tact then that.
Amkii 0
You sound like a jerk, OP. **** you.
RARE 0
I have a stutter. I have nothing else to say.
Dylan94_fml 8
Yeah thats probably best so as not to embarrass yourself ;) lol
SK25Reboo 0
@83, that was f***ed up, though it was funny, I had to admit.
starvingxartist 0
okay, i don't see how in anyone's universe that's flirting. or how asking if he's confused is flirting back. or why you assume he's flirting with you. and it's pretty obvious when someone has a stutter, even if they pause and don't actually say "j-j-j-jordan," the pause isn't like a natural pause. so, you really, really deserve it.