Today, I hired a cleaner to clean my apartment so when my in-laws visited tonight, they wouldn't think I was lazy. I got home from work, the cleaner hadn't shown at all, and my in-laws had arrived early. My mother-in-law is now mopping the floors. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my mom told me to clean the house up because she wants to make good impression on the cleaning lady. FML
Today, I thought I had the house all to myself for the weekend, but my annoying in-laws showed up unannounced and ruined my sleep-all-day plans by asking me to help clean out their RV. FML
Today, I decided to clean the whole house as a surprise for my mother. When she came home, she screamed at me and called me a bitch because she had wanted to clean it herself. FML
Today, I spent the day cleaning my apartment because my parents are visiting on Monday. I finally finished at midnight and went to bed exhausted. Then my mother called to say they couldn't make it after all. FML
Today, while my parents were grocery shopping, I cleaned the kitchen, swept floors, did laundry, and cleaned bathrooms, only to finish right before they got home. After dinner, my dad bitched and complained that I didn't take out the trash and he had no room to throw away his paper plate. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I cleaned his parents' whole house while they were out, just to be nice. When they came home, they assumed we only did it because we'd made some huge mess that we needed to hide. I'm now banned from their house. FML
Today, my parents came home after being out of town for the weekend. I stayed home, did homework and completely cleaned the house, thinking I could earn some brownie points with them. They saw how clean the house was and accused me of covering up a party. FML
Today, my girlfriend works for a company that cleans VRBOs, so while she went to see family for a week, I asked her coworkers to come clean while she was gone, even the owner of the company showed up, They deep-cleaned house, but when she got home I got yelled at for a dirty coffee mug on my desk. The coffee was still warm. FML
Today, my mom decided to have a get together at my house while I was at work. When I came home, she pulled me aside and asked me to pretend to be her maid. FML
Today, I woke up early to do the dishes and clean up, after having people over yesterday. Now my wife is mad at me because I didn't stay in bed with her longer. FML
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Top comments
Blueglasscup 18
YDI for being so lazy OP.
pman590 8
And instead of helping her you're on FML
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Comments (108)
Blueglasscup 18
YDI for being so lazy OP.
ooitastic 0
OP said lazy
Blueglasscup 18
Yeah you're right. Luckily I managed to change it.
enonymous 9
Need more lemon pledge... no... no... no... you buy.
xxmollyxx 25
no no. I keep job. I clean.
chlorinegreen 27
procrastination get you no where
wondabitch 0
and now you're on fml while your in laws clean?
Kawboy 1
So why the hell didn't your husband clean? Or are both of you lazy? I work alot and my house is spotless, it don't take much op. YDI
Kefka91 15
Consuela must've had to attend to Mister Superman's Fortress of Solitude while he's away. Also, YDI for being a lazy bum
VinegarStrokes 0
OP you're so pathetic!
NabbdjuretPerry 0
I hope its not same when you're showering.
Veraymix 6
Exact definition of lazy. The time it took you to call the cleaner and wait for them to come, you could have been cleaning. lt would have been done in time.
JohnBoyFsYL 10
Probably didn't show cos you weren't there to let her in. Despite the myth, cleaners can't walk through doors.
nerdfighteria 7
She called the cleaner and went to work. She wasn't waiting around her apartment staring at the piles of filth the entire time, although that's not to say that isn't what she usually does . . .
LNK112 5
And instead of helping her clean you're on a computer or phone typing up FMLs? Very lazy, OP.
geeksaresexy 18
Maybe OP wrote this while she was still at work?
knightsfb 0
77 it says when I got home from work....my guess is it happened a few days ago and they are typing it...fml just adds the today part
knightsfb 0
77 it says "when I got home from work"...my guess is that it happened a few days ago and I now typing it on fml...fml just adds the today part automatically
kemmons88 0
YDI for makin her mop.
balest22 0
I didnt know people still mopped these days?? doesn't everyone have swiffer?
ProhibitionRose 14
those things are inefficient. they do a shitty job. and nobody said OP made her mother-in-law mop...she was probably just so disgusted she did it herself.
rebecca_marie_21 0
I don't get why she didn't mop. She is lazy and mean!
Bbhd05 0
Right? What a dumb ass.
Oreogasm 5
that's something my mom would do. such a sweet lady. love you, ma
noelykins1 19
it's her mother in law... why didn't the husband clean up?
notsocrazee 0
that's like the Sims where you hire the maid and she either doesn't show up or she comes steals you table then leaves.
jessyrodgers 0
cause their his parents they already know he's lazy
flamminbunny 2
why couldn't you clean it?
ooitastic 0
because OP is fricken lazy
jannielovesjack 0
She said when she arrived home from work so maybe op had to go to work instead of cleaning? And if op is lazy so is her husband since he didn't clean either.
pman590 8
And instead of helping her you're on FML
smurfsarwales 9
every fml starts with today, it has to. use your frickin brain it exists, and realize that it was probably yesterday, or some time in the past this happened.
fthku 13
#42, the FML suggests that she wrote this while the mom was cleaning, whether this happened today, yesterday or 50 years ago- "is now mopping the floors".
geeksaresexy 18
But she may have still been at work since the mother-in-law arrived early..
fthku 13
"I got home from work ... My mother-in-law is now mopping the floors."
Reign_fml 3
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
sounds like a win too me, now you got some won to clean it for free!
Kawboy 1
I think the word you were looking for is "one", nice try though.
Reign_fml 3
meh, close enough, you knew what I ment
1215116a 14
'Won' and 'one' have the same amount of letters so why put 'won' if it takes the same amount of 'effort' to put 'one'? :P
lulututu 4
I hate when people do that. Like saying meh instead of me. Its so dumb.
Blazingcrono 6
Meh.
BobsUrAunty 2
I say/type meh to describe my mood lol eg 'how are you feeling?' 'meh'
Kawboy 1
^ how do you describe your hair?
juwood 7
nice man that totally rhymes.
ihaterats 0
cuz it's a total win so won is the better word!! and why put so much ****** effort Juss to try to correct some1 else?!
DeLpHe3zY 7
well I guess you can all have a big cleaning party! Family bonding is great isnt it! :D
kkins 0
I think if you want something done right you have to do it yourself
Lumenoire 0
Well, at least she can whistle while she works.
xixifwadi 0
yet another exaple of when lazyness prevails except for when it doesn't
oarisimo 4
laziness*
sassypants93 17
You went for correcting laziness and completely missed example. If you are going to correct spelling, then do it right.