Today, I went on a run with my crush. She expressed how happy she was to have a decent running partner, because the last one kept complaining he thought he might throw up. We got to the top of the hill and I puked right in front of her. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I decided to get back into shape and go for a run. With a 1/4 mile left to run, I saw a hot chick a block ahead of me running. Trying to show off I ran hard and passed her stopping just outside my complex. I started to throw up right as she came past me because I had run so hard to pass her. FML
Today, a girl I met recently asked if I wanted to go jogging with her, and I excitedly agreed. A while into our run, I ran out of breath and doubled over panting, all while she kept jogging and slowly disappeared down the street. What a way to spend time together. FML
Today, I threw up on my crush's lawn. FML
Today, I went to an amusement park with a group of friends, one of whom was a girl I really like. When we got on the roller coaster, I was ecstatic that she wanted to sit next to me. Not even half-way through, I ended up puking all over the both of us. FML
Today, 4 miles into a mountain hike with my crush, I suddenly felt a stomach pain, followed by the urge for explosive diarrhea. I had to stand still with my butt clenched to prevent shitting myself. There were no nearby bathrooms, and I didn't have any toilet paper. It was messy. She'll never see me the same. FML
Today, while I was running around the block, I got the urge to spit. Suddenly I noticed this beautiful girl running in front me. Trying to impress her, I smiled and by mistake drooled everything on the pavement. She wasn't impressed. FML
Today, I joined my crush for their workout class. I didn’t realize it was an advanced class. Ten minutes in, I was gasping for air, bright red, and drenched in sweat. The instructor had to stop and ask if I needed a paramedic. My crush offered me a cup of water along with a look of deep concern. FML
Today, I kissed my girlfriend. She threw up in my mouth. FML
Today, I went running. My girlfriend was so surprised at the fact that I'm exercising that she accused me of making it up so I could cheat on her. I'm just trying to get in shape. FML
Today, I was walking with my crush, and I told him how I felt. As soon as I turned to him, a bird shit on my face. FML
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Top comments
Racky_fml 14
Well at least you weren't complaining all the time.
cswens25 8
Better in front of her then on her
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Comments (73)
CoyoteOldOne 17
This is a self-correcting problem. It obviously wasn't meant to be, if she has hobbies that make you puke, and she hates puke.
Justateengirl15 5
Ohhh the irony
itsallbullshit 4
Alanis Morisette?
HighasaCloud 46
That could be a good thing. It showed her that you were dedicated enough to keep running past your comfort level and it showed her that you are not a whiny little bitch.
Summer_Nat 0
I totally agree #67 no one wants to hear constant whining I'd rather watch someone throw up!
jsanchez89 5
That's wifey right there!
gemmadaws 3
You got no chance sunshine go to Mac Donald's start looking there
beautikill89 9
I wish I had a decent running partner!
fantasyworld 39
You did good. You didn't complain or throw up on her.