Today, I washed the dishes for my mom while she was out, as they seemed to be piling up. I accidentally sliced my hand with a knife in the process. After a trip to the hospital, it was revealed she'd been leaving those dishes there "to teach dad a lesson." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
911 please
Today, I was helping my friend wash dishes. As I went to grab some tongs to dry them, I impaled my forearm on a knife that was sticking blade up. My friend wanted to finish the dishes before taking me to the hospital. FML
Not my day, is it?
Today, I was washing the dishes when I gave myself a nasty gash on my leg from the open dishwasher door. After five minutes of cleaning up the blood and wrapping it up, I came back to finish the job only to drop a plate and send broken shards into my foot. FML
Today, I was helping tidy up after my girlfriend's flat warming. I went to put a sharp kitchen knife in the sink while she was washing dishes, and stabbed her in the finger instead. FML
Today, I was emptying the cutlery section of the dishwasher when I reached down and accidentally got the tip of a steak knife wedged half-way under my fingernail. My mum yelled at me for getting blood on the clean dishes. FML
Getting a head start on the Halloween look
Today, while washing dishes for my friend, I managed to break an unbreakable glass and slice my hand open on it. FML
Fork off
Today, I was washing dishes after eating Christmas leftovers. I pulled a knife out of the drying rack and put it away to avoid cutting myself on it, yet I still managed to scrape my thumb on an errant fork in the sink. FML
Happy wife, happy life, right?
Today, I was chopping veggies for dinner and accidentally sliced through my thumbnail and into my finger. I wrapped it and finished cooking, despite being in considerable pain. My husband patted my shoulder and said sympathetically, "Don’t worry about the dishes babe. You can just do them tomorrow.” FML
Today, whilst stacking the dish washer I dropped a steak knife. Luckily, I caught it just before it hit my foot. I fist-pumped to celebrate my amazing catch and stabbed myself in the cheek. My parents couldn't stop laughing all the way to the hospital. FML
Today, while I was cutting myself some watermelon, my mom walked in. I could tell she hadn't taken her medication in a while because she freaked out, grabbed the knife, and burst into tears before yelling at me, saying I could have cut myself and bled out. FML
Spooked
Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to a figure holding a knife above me. After I screamed in terror, the figure burst into laughter. It was my mom. She did this as payback for me not washing the dishes last night after making food. FML
Top comments
HeyArnold91 8
I would give my dad the biggest guilt trip.
zandalee 20
You sound like a very good daughter! Sorry about your hand OP.
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Comments (75)
ElishaisSexy2016 9
That's a disappointment... I'm sorry
sougstad 7
They should totally take you to a five star restaurant now to make it up for your fathers obvious laziness and your mothers cruel intentions back firing
skyeyez9 25
My brother in law is still a teen and lives at home. He doesn't lift a finger when it comes to helping clean up (or even picking up after himself). Yet when my husband and I come over to visit every now and then, she expects me to wash the dishes, clean and help cook. While her teenage son sits in his room playing xbox. Parents who raise slobs are doing a great disservice. If they get married their wife or husband will be pissed cause of the constant messes.
spottyblanket 8
Hope you feel better op, bet your dad feels guilty. Meal out it is!
NurseAbi 10
Sorry to hear about your hand, op, I hope your dad does learn a lesson, from you. Make him feel guilty, milk it for all its worth!
ellytoad 13
Why don't parents ever say those things up front? Anyway, assuming your mom left the knife in the sink for your dad to cut himself on (which I hope isn't the case)... if he didn't have an excuse not to do the dishes before, he sure does now.
afropuffjake 9
This is why passive-aggressive is not a good idea.
loloalltheway 23
I just think that it is a fml because if the cut but not really for what your mother said ... And you are a very good daughter :)
TallMist 32
And why couldn't OP be a male instead of a female?
Celina_Lune 20
Don't you just love passive aggressive people??
InfiniIII 6
I would then proceed to put a death wish on my dad...