Today, I was with my mom and my boyfriend at lunch. My phone rings and my mom excitedly says "You have friends!" As I'm about to answer it, she pulls out her phone from under the table and says "Kidding, it's just me." My boyfriend starts cracking up, and they exchange a high five. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I discovered I was at the same restaurant as my ex and his new girlfriend. Quickly, I picked up my mother's phone when she wasn't looking, and began to pretend to talk to a fake new boyfriend. Few seconds later, the waiter loudly asked me if I was done talking into the calculator. FML
Today, I called one of my old coworkers to see how she was doing. My boyfriend answered the phone. FML
Today, I went to dinner with my mom and her new boyfriend. At the restaurant, while we were eating, he started clapping and singing, "If You're Happy and You Know It." My mom joined in. They sang loudly. Loud enough for the entire restaurant to go quiet and stare. FML
Today, my co-worker handed me the phone and said it was my boyfriend calling, so I answered "Hello, Love!" It was my boss. FML
Today, my boyfriend accidentally called me from his pocket. I thought it would be funny to see what him and his friends were talking about. I laughed when I heard him talking about us fooling around until I realized it wasn't me. FML
Today, I was introducing my boyfriend to my parents for the first time. I meant to say, "Mom, Dad, this is Tom." Instead, I said, "Mom, Dad, this is Mom." My boyfriend is now jokingly reconsidering our relationship, and my parents won't stop making fun of me. FML
Today, while I was sitting in the living room with my mother, my phone rang. She immediately exclaimed, "I'm not calling you! Why is it going off?" She was serious. My own mother doesn't believe people talk to me. FML
Today, while talking to my boyfriend, I was frantically searching for my cell phone. He was curious as to what I was doing so I told him. There was long silence followed by laughter. He could hardly breathe as he told me, "Honey you're on your phone talking to me." FML
Today, my mom called me to tell me she'd got in touch with my ex for his birthday, and that the two of them had made a plan for us to get back together. My new boyfriend was in the process of proposing to me. FML
Today, I went to a surprise birthday party for a friend. Everyone was hiding and waiting to yell "Surprise!" when I got a call from my mom. I was loudly discussing family gossip and trying to get my mom to hang up when the door opened. Everyone yelled "Surprise!" and then turned to stare at me. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
nel15 0
hahahahaha your mom is hilarious....relax, it was just a joke.
purple990 0
thats awsome they're the cooloest people ever to hang out with, and at least your momma and boyfriend dont hate each other, geez be grateful
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (153)
teeda 1
I think this shows a sense of humour. I hope you laughed too.
thelonelylurker 0
That's a pretty awesome mom and boyfriend you have!
irrelevantxx 0
Omg that's awful
jeanii_fml 4
Lol, that's funny. :P
kellster 2
Well, did you start ignoring all your friends once you got yourself a relationship? Your mom was just showing off for your boyfriend. Pity he didn't stand up for you.
flyingpan8 0
your mom is a bitch. i would have taken the fork and gouged her eye out and made your boyfriend eat the eye (for laughing and high-fiving your bitch mom) if i were you.... but, the bottom line remains that i am not you, so all i will do is agree with the folk who say "fyl"... you can't change your insensitive bitch of a mother, but you can definitely change your boyfriend...and you should.
luv2laugh242 0
haha very funny tho, you should just laugh it off
Mr_Horrible 0
That sucks for you, so FYL. But I have to admit, that's pretty damn funny.
damnbraddah 0
that's funny I would prolly do the same to my gf
BigPaperClip 0
At least you don't have to worry about them not getting along with each other.
brie3 0
Seriously, she should feel lucky. My moms always so hard on my bffs...
maipinkbear 0
definitely. your mom and boyfriend seem pretty cool, so calm down and get a sense of humor too