Today, I was with my mom and my boyfriend at lunch. My phone rings and my mom excitedly says "You have friends!" As I'm about to answer it, she pulls out her phone from under the table and says "Kidding, it's just me." My boyfriend starts cracking up, and they exchange a high five. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I discovered I was at the same restaurant as my ex and his new girlfriend. Quickly, I picked up my mother's phone when she wasn't looking, and began to pretend to talk to a fake new boyfriend. Few seconds later, the waiter loudly asked me if I was done talking into the calculator. FML
Today, I called one of my old coworkers to see how she was doing. My boyfriend answered the phone. FML
Today, I went to dinner with my mom and her new boyfriend. At the restaurant, while we were eating, he started clapping and singing, "If You're Happy and You Know It." My mom joined in. They sang loudly. Loud enough for the entire restaurant to go quiet and stare. FML
Today, my co-worker handed me the phone and said it was my boyfriend calling, so I answered "Hello, Love!" It was my boss. FML
Today, my boyfriend accidentally called me from his pocket. I thought it would be funny to see what him and his friends were talking about. I laughed when I heard him talking about us fooling around until I realized it wasn't me. FML
Today, I was introducing my boyfriend to my parents for the first time. I meant to say, "Mom, Dad, this is Tom." Instead, I said, "Mom, Dad, this is Mom." My boyfriend is now jokingly reconsidering our relationship, and my parents won't stop making fun of me. FML
Today, while I was sitting in the living room with my mother, my phone rang. She immediately exclaimed, "I'm not calling you! Why is it going off?" She was serious. My own mother doesn't believe people talk to me. FML
Today, while talking to my boyfriend, I was frantically searching for my cell phone. He was curious as to what I was doing so I told him. There was long silence followed by laughter. He could hardly breathe as he told me, "Honey you're on your phone talking to me." FML
Today, my mom called me to tell me she'd got in touch with my ex for his birthday, and that the two of them had made a plan for us to get back together. My new boyfriend was in the process of proposing to me. FML
Today, I went to a surprise birthday party for a friend. Everyone was hiding and waiting to yell "Surprise!" when I got a call from my mom. I was loudly discussing family gossip and trying to get my mom to hang up when the door opened. Everyone yelled "Surprise!" and then turned to stare at me. FML
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Top comments
nel15 0
hahahahaha your mom is hilarious....relax, it was just a joke.
purple990 0
thats awsome they're the cooloest people ever to hang out with, and at least your momma and boyfriend dont hate each other, geez be grateful
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Comments (153)
RatIsKing 0
wow, that is so mean :( I would hate anyone doing that to me, even my family
Kofu 0
Oh, please. If you can't realize that was a joke, I have nothing more to say.
daking963 3
its a joke and all maybe its funny. but if you are insecure about not having any friends it is NOT funny to that person. so yes it is a FML situation.
happyhak 5
HA HA! Sounds like something my mom would do! I actually started cracking up when I read this! So hilarious! But FYL
Ricky_Love 0
that is one funny mom
mama2b3 20
hahahaha my mom would totally do this to me and my boyfriend would react the same way lol
fdp_fml 2
HAHAHA. mom ftw.
vk_hime 0
Lmao, thats awesome.
ecascio2010 9
that's mean.
Stefaniebby 0
HAHAHAHA! That's ******* HILARIOUS! Take a joke and don't be a prude! At least your mom and boytoy get along!