Today, I was watching a movie alone with my girlfriend. She shifted positions as I put my arm around her, and ended up kneeing me in the crotch and shouldering me in the throat simultaneously. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to the movies with my girlfriend. As I started putting my arm around her, I hit her in the face. FML
Today, my girlfriend snuck up behind me to cover my eyes and play "guess who." The second her hands touched my face, I grabbed her, twisted her wrists, and kneed her to the floor out of instinct. FML
Today, I asked a girl out and made plans to go see a movie. About 5 minutes in, I made a move to put my arm around her and smashed her in the face. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were at the movies. When the "love scene" came on, she leaned over and made out with the wrong man. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I took a nap on my couch. She used my arm as a pillow, and everything was pretty peaceful, until she moved over and practically dislocated my shoulder. My screams of pain woke her, which was apparently an "asshole move" on my part. FML
Today, while my girlfriend and I were making out, she went to fix the pillow behind her head and punched me straight in the face. FML
Today, I was watching a horror movie with my girlfriend. Suddenly, the killer jumped on screen. My girlfriend screamed. I pissed myself. FML
Today, I was on a date with this girl. I attempted to put my arm around her, but I elbowed her in the face instead. FML
Today, I was going on a date with my girlfriend. When I took her home, her sister came to the door. I used to date her sister and I didn't know they were related. My girlfriend realized this, then kicked me in the crotch. FML
Today, I asked a girl I like to the movies. Wanting her to lean on me and stay in my arms during the movie, I chose a horror film. I screamed like a pussy the whole time. FML
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Top comments
Dracoboxer357 36
Well, did she kiss them better at least? ;P Double owned, sorry Op. :p
perdix 31
It was no accident. She probably just read "Fifty Shades of Grey" and decided to jazz things up with that S&M shit.
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Comments (72)
DocBastard 40
Maybe you shouldn't be dating Hulk.
mario2012 18
Or in this case, she Hulk.
reject214 10
Did you enjoy it? I know I would have.
xpaulatanx 10
Hope she made it up to you. Ouch~
fortunelady 17
Aw, poor OP. I'm sure she feels awful about it. I have a friend who is quite clumsy and has kneed her boyfriend in the nuts on more than one occasion. Pretty sure she's never Combo-ed him though... Ouch. :(
fortunelady 17
Also, looking on the bright side, sounds like you have one flexible girlfriend. Kudos.
PamChopsWithMint 5
She loves you do hard!
PamChopsWithMint 5
So*
siberianhamster 17
You were watching alone... with your girlfriend?
SquishFish 15
I accidentally did this to my boyfriend the other day....
JoeParris 1
Maybe this is him?
JoeParris 1
Or maybe not idk but getting hit in the nuts by your gf automatically means she better be down there making you feel better. right?
skullofdarkness 18
You and op are both from Queensland Australia, it's entirely possible op could be your bf...
skittihorse 8
Well that's a shifty situation...
kirdypie 14
I do that to my boyfriend a lot by accident as well. Unlucky there OP