Today, I was using a public urinal when a man came up to use the one next to me. As he approached, he said, "Friendly spy plane inbound" and pretended to look at my knob. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was peeing in a public bathroom when a guy walked in and passed by 4 open urinals to use the one next to mine. After feeling his gaze for a second, I confronted him with my own, in hopes he would stop. Instead, I stared into a stranger's eyes until I finished peeing. FML
Today, at the urinal a guy came up next to me to do his business. He stared over at me, looked down, laughed and then left. FML
Today, I was in a stall in a public restroom. Someone came in and started using one of the urinals. Somehow, before I knew it, I found I had just loudly whispered, "SOMEbody's taking a piiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiss." FML
Today, at work while on the toilet, somebody came into the stall next to me and gave a loud play by play of every fart, plop, and grunt. He then asked loudly who I was and when I didn't answer put his head under the stall to look at me. FML
Today, I was in the bathroom, when someone came up behind me. Instead of waiting for a urinal to free up, he wedged his way in between me and another guy, and promptly began peeing in my urinal, crossing streams in the process. FML
Today, I was using a public restroom. As I lowered my pants, a man's head and arms popped out over the divider. He took a picture and immediately rushed out. FML
Today, I went into the men's restroom and started peeing in a urinal next to a middle-age man. As he zipped up and walked away, he said to me, "Don't worry, it'll grow." FML
Today, while using a public toilet, a guy started pissing beside me at the urinal. The breach of bathroom etiquette then escalated to him taking a long look down at me and saying, "Nice sack, dude." followed by him finishing up and leaving without even washing his hands. FML
Today, while using a urinal in a very busy mall bathroom, another man unzipped his pants and attempted to use the same one as me. FML
Today, while using a public restroom to change my tampon, I made eye contact with someone looking at me through the little space in the door. FML
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Top comments
smashingdiscover 0
Enemy spotted
annajane 0
Pretended to? You sure about that?
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Comments (286)
KMFiredancer 0
Wow, of all of the bathroom FMLs this is by far the funniest I've read.
poolshark1017 0
Just goes to show you how GAY call of duty is!!!
helterskeltersmi 0
He was jealous of the size of your plane. He knew he was outsized!
uridea 14
I don't think he pretended haha
BigJ365 4
Some one liked the game blackocks
GEFStryker 29
Sierra Hotel, can't stop laughing.
jose1760 1
He was joking.. To everyone that would punch him in the face get a sense of humor!!
Petal23 11
something tells me that he wasn't pretending!
dwhite312 0
YDI for not having Ghost.
Legendslayer222 26
Best comments section ever. This even beats the one with all the Chuck Norris jokes. Good job everyone!