Today, I was using a public urinal when a man came up to use the one next to me. As he approached, he said, "Friendly spy plane inbound" and pretended to look at my knob. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was peeing in a public bathroom when a guy walked in and passed by 4 open urinals to use the one next to mine. After feeling his gaze for a second, I confronted him with my own, in hopes he would stop. Instead, I stared into a stranger's eyes until I finished peeing. FML
Today, at the urinal a guy came up next to me to do his business. He stared over at me, looked down, laughed and then left. FML
Today, I was in a stall in a public restroom. Someone came in and started using one of the urinals. Somehow, before I knew it, I found I had just loudly whispered, "SOMEbody's taking a piiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiss." FML
Today, at work while on the toilet, somebody came into the stall next to me and gave a loud play by play of every fart, plop, and grunt. He then asked loudly who I was and when I didn't answer put his head under the stall to look at me. FML
Today, I was in the bathroom, when someone came up behind me. Instead of waiting for a urinal to free up, he wedged his way in between me and another guy, and promptly began peeing in my urinal, crossing streams in the process. FML
Today, I was using a public restroom. As I lowered my pants, a man's head and arms popped out over the divider. He took a picture and immediately rushed out. FML
Today, I went into the men's restroom and started peeing in a urinal next to a middle-age man. As he zipped up and walked away, he said to me, "Don't worry, it'll grow." FML
Today, while using a public toilet, a guy started pissing beside me at the urinal. The breach of bathroom etiquette then escalated to him taking a long look down at me and saying, "Nice sack, dude." followed by him finishing up and leaving without even washing his hands. FML
Today, while using a urinal in a very busy mall bathroom, another man unzipped his pants and attempted to use the same one as me. FML
Today, while using a public restroom to change my tampon, I made eye contact with someone looking at me through the little space in the door. FML
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Top comments
smashingdiscover 0
Enemy spotted
annajane 0
Pretended to? You sure about that?
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Comments (286)
duckman9 55
At least did he get a nice view? Your fist in his eye would have definitely given him something to remember.
XxDrUnKeNGaMeRxX 0
Ahh The Great Down Under.
lusk123 0
Call of dooty. xD.
Coolguyt2 0
you should've said "counter spy plane in bound"
RuCheezBurger 10
Friendly SR-71 Above.
slkc91 1
That is the most awesome thing anybody can say in a public restroom.
red1355 6
Love all the replies!!! Best ever!!! I would have jetisoned some of my spy plane fuel on him!! Lol
Letter0 0
Say "friendly blackbird is airborne" and then look over and say "friendly artillery coordinates recieved" and punch him in the crotch.
smhlqnick 0
You should have replied with "friendly fire" and peed on him.
Synyster430 0
******* campers..