Today, I was told the Mandarin greeting that my new Chinese friends at school taught me was not really a greeting at all. I've been proclaiming "I'm a dumb bitch" every time I've greeted them, almost every day for the past month. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was asked to prove that I was Chinese by translating the phrase, "Ching chong ming chang ho". I'm not even Chinese. FML
Today, I found out that the loving nickname my Chinese mother has been calling me my entire life essentially translates to "little retard". FML
Today, at a tutoring center, one of the tutors looked at my worksheet and laughed. She then showed all the other tutors my mistakes and they laughed along with her. The best part? They all speak Chinese and they think I can't understand them. I'm Chinese. FML
Today, I found out that I’ve been greeting a coworker by the wrong name for six weeks. The worst part? They never corrected me because they thought it was funny, especially because it turns out to be their mom's name. FML
Today, I found out that the nickname my friend has been calling me in Japanese for the past year is the word for "Idiot". FML
Today, I was trying to get my girlfriend to speak Mandarin. After speaking her first words and taking a break, she posted on Facebook: "I speak ching chong! :D :D :D" FML
Today, I was instructed by my boss to welcome the 2 new foreign business partners since I am the only one who could speak their language. When they arrived I greeted them in their language. One of them scratched his head and asked his companion in plain and clear English, "What did he say?" FML
Today, I've learned two things. One, my Chinese cousins don't know much about the USA, and two, they now believe it's proper manners to shout, "FREEEEDOM" before ending a call with me. FML
Today, I was eating at a Chinese restaurant, when I stopped the waitress to tell her that even though I am of Chinese heritage, I can't understand a word of Chinese. After an awkward silence, she told me she was actually speaking English. FML
Today, my new boss sat me down and told me he's seriously reconsidering my hire, all because I greeted him with, "Howdy, boss!" instead of, "Good morning, sir." Apparently this indicates a lack of respect for his authority. FML
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Top comments
jessimica642 8
Lol that's so mean, but funny
Minna_fml 14
Then say nothing at all.
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Comments (204)
shinyeeveekj 0
Haha… well in Japanese I no beeyotch is mesu!
shawnaishere 14
I dont know who's worse, the "friends" that told you or all the people that didn't bother to correct you or at least make sure you knew what you were saying.
ImaginaryFoe 1
All what people? She was only greeting her friends that way. It doesn't sound like she knows anyone else that speaks Mandarin.
mollysticks 10
That is so mean, but classic.
steelflax 5
Y didnt u look it up
uumlaut_strohson 3
aww come on... who hasn't done that to someone?? It's fun.
hateevryone 15
Maybe you should've looked it up when they first taught it to you. You know, save yourself the humiliation.
melrose90210 10
I wouldnt call them 'friends'...
aceangel6 4
Nihau Kailan. Watch it. P.S I`m not sure how to spell it considering I don`t watch it but know of it.
M_Rainbow 7
Why can't I comment in Chinese?
stlim93 5
Next time, change the I am to you're when u see him/her