Today, I was told I needed to start carrying bandaids with me at work because practically every day I hurt myself. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I cut my finger deep on an envelope at work and started bleeding profusely. When I asked my co-worker for a band-aid, she told me to get back to work and stop making up excuses to try and hit on her. FML
Today, I got a paper cut while opening my box of Band-Aids. FML
Today, I cut my hand on nothing while at work. It bled so much, I began to feel woozy, and everyone kept brushing me off when I asked where the first aid kits were. FML
Today, while drilling holes in "No Smoking" signs for my job, I gave myself a minor cut that would appear to most as a papercut. I then had to fill out 3 double-sided pages of paperwork. FML
Today, I received roughly 50 paper cuts while I was at work. I didn't realize this until after I applied hand sanitizer. FML
Today, I sliced my arm open on the weekend, patched it with a fabric bandaid. Had an allergic reaction to the bandaid, arm now swollen, blistering and keeping-me-awake itchy. Pharmacist's advice? "Oooh, that looks bad. Better put a bandaid on that." FML
Today, I hurt my back at work due to faulty, outdated, and just crap equipment. Workers’ comp offered me two Tylenols and a pamphlet about "mindfulness over medical bills." FML
Today, while I was at work in a machine shop, I cut myself really bad. Not with any of the sharp tools, drills, or metals I work with. Just the soap dispenser. FML
Today, I discovered that I'm allergic to band-aids. I now have a band-aid shaped rash around a tiny cut on my leg. Oh the irony. FML
Today, I walked too close to a first-aid kit sticking out of a wall at work, and it cut my arm. Laughing at the irony, I opened it to get a band aid out. It was empty. FML
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Top comments
luther48 20
Bubble wrap time
MessedUpLife00 13
How does one manage to hurt themselves everyday, what is your job?
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Comments (28)
ChildishPerson 13
I can relate to hurting yourself often. I'm really clumsy, I trip and bump myself into things a lot. So much so that when someone asks me how I got a bruise I literally have no idea, having forgotten about the incident already
chewsef 17
We may have been separated at birth.
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delichick 27
Holy you sound like me - I do food prep and slice deli meat and I usually cut myself with a knife or the slicer at least a couple times a week. My boss snorted one day and asked me how Im still alive. Plus Im usually tripping or bumping intonsomething so Im bruised up
Dictionaryspeaks 18
Well why don't you just claim disability instead
R_L_Jack 11
I was taught in first aid to keep bandaids in my wallet. Over the years it sure came in handy!
Ashlyn_King 8
Haha I'm the same at my job literally ever time I'm there is hurt myself. I work in a big kitchen. Hope you don't hurt yourself to bad. Best of luck.
longbeck4 28
I feel you, I'm literally always hurting my self. If you can hurt your self on it I will. If you can't I will manage to still.
kristinjeaneen 21
Don't feel bad, OP. I'm the same way. I'm very clumsy which leads to lots of injuries work related or not.
cuz803 46
Accident proof the place if u can