Today, I was telling my wife how being told to drink water all day when you're not even thirsty is "such a scam". Suddenly, I felt an excruciating pain in my abdomen. The ER had to give me IV fluids because I was so constipated from dehydration. The bill was over $2000. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I received the bill for my trip to the ER months ago. Almost $1000 for a quick 2.5 hour stay, only to find out that I had bad gas from drinking far too much of the seltzer I had bought on sale. FML
Today, I had horrible pains in my stomach area so I went to the doctors. They couldn't find anything wrong and sent me to the Emergency Room for X-rays. After spending the entire day in the hospital, they tell me I'm slightly constipated. I had to pay $400 to find out I had to take a shit. FML
Do not attempt this at home
Today, I was constipated and so desperate to go that I ate an entire box of laxatives. Now I'm in the hospital on a saline drip for dehydration and malnutrition, in addition to getting a massive enema and having the most agonizing shit of my life. FML
Waterworld
Today, I went to the doctor with serious digestive issues, only to be told off the bat that I just need to drink more water. She wasn’t interested to hear that 1) I already drink the recommended daily amount and 2) drinking when I don’t feel like it fucks up my system even worse. FML
Today, I had to get an ultrasound, which required me to drink 3 glasses of water beforehand. The doctor said I had too much and told me to go pee out just a little and come back. It took a lot of effort to hold the rest in. The first thing she did when I got back was press on my abdomen. I peed myself. FML
Today, I took my 8 month-old to Urgent Care due to extreme constipation. I spent $25 for my son to poop on me the second the doctor had me remove his diaper. FML
Today, I woke up with extreme stomach pains. After being rushed to the hospital and having numerous tests performed, I was told my intestines were over-stretched with stool. I'm essentially so full of shit it hurts. FML
Bunged up
Today, after months of incredibly painful stomach cramps, I convinced my mom that I needed to see a doctor. Not even 2 minutes into the exam, the doctor tells me that I'm heavily constipated and advised some "prune juice" to help "clear all that shit out". My mom won't stop laughing at me. FML
Today, I went to the company's health clinic to treat muscle spasms and a possible cracked rib. In the process the old quack doc and overly eager nurses wound up giving me a storng laxative and 3 enemas, two of them quite large. Then I still had to return to work. FML
Today, I was tired from an all-nighter I'd pulled because I thought I had the next four days off work. I got called in, and went because I have bills to pay. However, the amount of energy drinks I drank to stay on top of my job duties gave me such bad diarrhea, I had to go home. FML
Top comments
BurnInDemonFire 39
Given that humans are 70-80% water (I forget the exact figure), it makes sense that we need to drink some to replenish what we lose. Were you not taught this in school?
jbuckets_404 39
Besides staying hydrated, you also need sufficient daily fiber in your diet to AVOID constipation....
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Comments (32)
BurnInDemonFire 39
Given that humans are 70-80% water (I forget the exact figure), it makes sense that we need to drink some to replenish what we lose. Were you not taught this in school?
iRoybot 16
yeah, that's not really how this works... dehydration is actually incredibly difficult state to achieve (if you can call it achieving) in humans, OK must have REALLY not liked the idea of drinking lol
iRoybot 16
OP'
iRoybot 16
OP'
jbuckets_404 39
Besides staying hydrated, you also need sufficient daily fiber in your diet to AVOID constipation....
Dave_Davington 34
So, you paid $2000 for a bag of water. Well, the prevention may not be a scam, but the cure certainly is (well, more of a price gouge than a scam, but you know, semantics).
AXel2169 23
Well, he's paying for using the ER and taking up the personnel's time
protoskore 27
A shame they don't live in a developed western country where subsidized universal healthcare is a thing
regi13 8
Why should we have to pay for this idiot?
wanted_2_want 40
What if instead of the IV the ER would’ve used an enema on you. Wouldn’t that scare you more into drinking water in the conventional way? Just sayin’
Justine Malang 16
Such a scam? At least you now know you were being ignorant.
bl3ur0z3 17
Water you gonna do cooking forward? Drink more what are from now on. Seriously, carry a 32oz what are bottle and force yourself to drink it all day. You should have to fill it again half way through.
iRoybot 16
that's actually a myth. different people need different amounts of water depending on size and environmental factors.
lucasj23 11
ydi. you're an idiot.
Takegami 22
I guess your body had enough of your shit, huh
Spencer Seymer 6
The sensation of thirst is actually the first sign of dehydration. you are supposed to drink enough fluids so that you actually never really feel thirsty...
ViviMage 40
8 glasses of water is kinda a scam. Still then you're thirsty. Humans don't tend to overdrink (unless their holding their wee for a Wii), and if your thirsty you will seek out water (unless you mistake that for hunger). Too little can also cause blood clots and DVTs