Today, I got paired up with a coworker for a three-month project. All he talks about is how attractive my girlfriend is and what he would do with her. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I overheard my husband of 3 years talking to our boss, an attractive blonde. She was telling him that she couldn't believe he was with me. She thinks I'm fat and ugly and that he's hot. He said, "She's not that bad…" We work in the same store and she follows him around like a puppy. FML
Today, a coworker told me she may be in love with me. I admitted similar feelings and we agreed, since we're both happily married, not to spend time together anymore. Two hours later we were both promoted to run the same project, where we'll be "working hand in glove for the next couple of years." FML
Today, the guy I've been crushing on at work finally asked me out to lunch. I was nervous we wouldn't have anything to talk about. He spent the entire hour talking about how amazing his new girlfriend is. FML
Today, my coworker was talking about how he's met the man of his dreams and they've been dating for 3 months. He showed me a picture of them at Niagara Falls last weekend. His new boyfriend is my husband, who was supposedly on a business trip in Boston. FML
Today, I was flirting with this guy that had been forced to be my lab partner for class. He was really funny and attractive, too. In the middle of our conversation he said "You're so cute! You remind me of my boyfriend!" FML
Today, I was paired up with my long-term crush for a project. She introduced herself to me and asked if I was new this year. We've gone to the same school since kindergarten. FML
Today, I got friendzoned by my coworker. He'll constantly remind me that he's there for me if I ever need anything or someone to talk to, he's sexy as hell, and he pulls me in for close hugs. This is gonna be a long-ass summer. Oh, did I mention it's a communal living situation in the middle of the mountains? FML
Today, the girl who tormented my life for nine years was hired at my part-time job. We're assigned to work together on a three-month-long project which will involve tons of communication. FML
Today, I asked my boss a simple question about a problem I was having with a project I am currently doing. He replied: ''You don't worry your sweet little ass about it babe". My boss is my girlfriend's father. Nice. FML
Today, I had a long talk with my now ex-boyfriend. I explained why I'm not comfortable with him bringing up his new female coworker multiple times a day, talking with her about their kinks and fetishes, or possibly being around her outside of work. We've been together for nine years. He's only known her for a week. FML
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Top comments
Lukcia 5
Complain. That's some form of harassment, you don't need to take it.
jerryj 27
Tell him what you'll do to him if he doesn't stop.
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Comments (120)
Lukcia 5
Complain. That's some form of harassment, you don't need to take it.
confusedAsFuck 34
Why not settle it down the old-fashioned way, a boot far up his ass..
Wakachulak 22
#16, because then he would have something to complain to HR about? Come to think of it, that actually might be his gameplan.
A07 48
Or you could just punch him in the throat!
jw90 18
I would send in the complaint or a request to work with someone else. If that don't work, then shove your foot up his ass.
Llama_Face89 34
19- that's why you take him out for a couple drinks first. Neutral territory.
tjv3 10
Well satellite him to stop and if he doesn't then tell him if he doesn't then you will report him for harassment
jerryj 27
Tell him what you'll do to him if he doesn't stop.
SoliDSt33L 33
A kick to the ass works. Most of the time, that is.
SoliDSt33L 33
Damn, I didn't see #16's comment. I basically said the same thing.
Dramori 29
Threaten to knock his lights out?
junkman6 22
Punching someone like that out does nothing. You gotta mind game the perv, be like "hey we did that and she was damn good too, to bad she won't get with a dumbass like you." Or something like "man I'm living all your perverted dreams, must suck knowing you can only talk about it." The guys jealous and knows it bugs you, flip that shit right around on him.
Wakachulak 22
I'm pretty sure this qualifies under sexual harassment.
firefighter925 18
And why haven't you beat the shit of him yet? thats your girl, you're supposed to protect her.
Zebediabolical 45
I would guess it's because that's assault and will very likely end up with OP being fired and maybe tossed in a jail cell.
Sandsh8rk 36
Jeez, this guy has no idea what boundaries are. Talk to your boss about it, it's considered harassment and you won't get any work done.
liketenpandas 6
your pic pretty much summed up my inner response to this. then it quickly turned into malice... ahh why is this world so unforgiving!
TrinityNevada 11
Sounds like you really need to set (and stick with) some boundaries. Next time your co worker says something, cut him off and say something like, "That's my girlfriend you're talking about. It's insulting to her and to me when you make comments like that. If you do it again, I <i>will</i> report you to management and I will <i>keep</i> reporting you to management." could that cause problems (like people trying to sabotage you in an underhanded way) for you? Yes. But while you're looking for a new job (tell HR that you will quit if they allow this to continue), document everything that happens. Good luck!
Sandsh8rk 36
This isn't a html document, tags like won't work.
djxerxes9000 18
I wondered what the **** those symbols were for, now I know.
Mr25_fml 14
Ah! I accidentally have this a thumbs down! Stupid phone
TrinityNevada 11
Oops. Ah well, whatever. This is what happens when I wake up too early
ShittyBikes 6
It's a way to let us know we should read those words as if they were in italics. I actually found it a pretty elegant substitute for putting them in italics.
Mr25_fml 14
The next time he brings it up, smile. The things he wants to do, you actually can do. The girl he wants is already yours.
djxerxes9000 18
Let me guess, she has "Nice Melons"
RedPillSucks 33
Yes. She sells them in the yard. It brings out all the boys.
KillSwitch96 18
Sorry #52! They aren't milkshakes though so they won't bring out any of the boys to her yard! Lol
DocktarNick 9
Sneak up behind him when he doesn't know you're there and whisper in his ear that you're gonna do everything to him that he said he'd do to your girlfriend. He probably won't believe you so wait until you finish the project then actually do it! he'll never see it coming! You'll never have to deal with him as a partner again.
Wakachulak 22
He can't fist him. Oh wait...
Miss_Latina 13
That would sound gay! And what if he swings that way.
bthecook 2
This is literally a scenario from the Big Bang Theory
fleur_de_fevrier_fml 23
Tell him that everything he wants to do to her, you'll do to him. On a serious note, I would warn him officially that this is not acceptable and if he doesn't get the point, just take it to the management or HR.