Today, I was talking to one of my British friends online, and he told me to say "yew anchors" a few times really fast. I'm a fairly stupid person, and wasn't very focused, so I did as he said. When I finally figured what the words meant, my dad had heard and grounded me for cursing. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, my dad grounded me for swearing, after I read a funny comment on Youtube to my sister. The supposed swear word? "YOLO." FML
Today, my grandmother told me to say "sofa king retarded" really fast. Not only did it take me several attempts to figure out what it meant, I'm now grounded by my mother for having a foul mouth. FML
Today, my dad made a big show of sending me to my room and grounding me for a week. Not because he heard me cursing at my video game, but because I "swear like a little girl" and it embarrassed him in front of his friends. FML
Proportional response
Today, our house caught fire. While trying to help my mom get to safety, the word "fuck" accidentally escaped my mouth. Once we were safe, she said I was grounded for swearing. I'm 19. FML
Today, my dog kept barking at the door, and I jokingly shouted, "Language!" My mom heard and grounded me for yelling at the dog. FML
You OK hon?
Today, my normally very modest and prissy mom came home, pissed off about something. I asked her what was wrong, but she wouldn't say, and snapped at me to "fuck off." She then grounded me for "making" her use that kind of "vile language." FML
Shook
Today, for the first time in my 20 years of life, I heard my dad unironically say the f-word. I was so shocked by it that I became became practically frozen for a full minute, which is not a very good thing to happen when you're at work, and your boss is watching you. FML
No cussing
Today, my parents punished me and made me wash my mouth out with soap for cursing. I'm almost 19. I said the word "Hell". FML
Learning moment
Today, I was babysitting my 6-year-old brother and was playing Mario. When I won, he called me a cunt. I was in shock and asked him where he learnt the word. He said from me when I was driving. He then told my mum that I taught him a new word. Easy to say, I'm in big trouble. FML
Alexa, play "You made me realise" by My Bloody Valentine
Today, my now ex-boyfriend called me out after I spelt "realised" with an S instead of a Z. It wouldn't have been so bad, if we weren't both British, if he hadn't called me an "illiterate idiot", and if he hadn't muttered "family of morons" when my mum backed me up. FML
Top comments
NeatNit 33
#7, I don't know how to say this in a way that doesn't sound sarcastic, but THANK YOU! that would have taken me ages to figure out by myself.
OBTrice 15
So is it pronounced you anchors because if so idk what the bad word is
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Comments (64)
DocBastard 40
"Wankers" is what your father considers cursing? What the ******* **** is wrong with that ******?
OochenSnoochen 15
Lol I reckon good on him. Some kids get away with too much foul language sometimes.
eleven22 11
says mr. cocking fuckborough ^
Ariana_Grande_fml 8
What does wankers mean?
thomcmoore 23
I don't think it translates all that well with my California accent.
steve31789 8
I said that a few times to see what it was he was trying to make you say haha
wvcheesehead 13
Better than "My Dixie wrecked"
thecrazymancan 17
I never understood why people decided to set aside certain words as "bad words". It seems really childish.
thomcmoore 23
I don't think it's "childish" if it's only adults who implement such things. I get your point though.
Brandi_Faith 34
It's just the fact that certain words are considered rude, and therefore society uses those words rudely. If the word "bum" was taken by society to be as rude/bad a word as the "F" word than I wouldn't want my kid to say it and I probably wouldn't say it myself. It's not the words themselves but how society views them and how people use them.
Enslaved 38
I was once told to look down my shirt and slowly spell A-T-T-I-C. Took a few tries to understand the joke.
Garrett2818 21
Your sofa king dumb haha
tehdarkness 21
That's not really a curse. Your dad sounds like a wanker.
yzzami 17
Op shows up as being from the US and got in trouble for saying wankers?
shankypotato 13
I think in the U.S., and correct me if I'm wrong, it has a more insulting meaning, which is to be George W. Bush.
MrsReed 14
No, Obama! Now there's a wanker :/
CletusBuckford 2
I like how you say "I'm a fairly stupid person" lmao Got me rolling