Today, I was talking to my guy friend on the phone. He said, "You sound depressed, I should cheer you up and give you a big hug." Jokingly, I responded, "You wouldn't hug something as gross as me." His response? "You'd be surprised." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Don't do this at work
Today, I jokingly went over to a an attractive female co-worker and said, "You look like you need a hug". She told me she wasn't feeling well and didn't want to be touched. No more than 30 seconds after our encounter, she ran to give one of our more attractive male co-workers a hug. FML
Today, I was cuddling with the guy I'm dating and said, "You smell good." His response, "You don't." FML
Awful line of inquiry
Today, I was hanging out with my boyfriend. Everything seemed to be going well, when all of a sudden he turned to look at me with a pensive and thoughtful expression. I expected him to say something important, but instead he just said, "I was wondering, how does it feel to be fat?" FML
Today, my boyfriend grabbed my love handles. It tickled, so I giggled and squirmed out of his grip. He looked at me quizzically and said, "I'm surprised you still have feeling there with all that fat." FML
Today, I ended up talking to a homeless man and bought him a meal. In return, he hugged me and groped my ass. FML
Today, I was talking to this guy that I like a lot and I think he likes me back. When he told me I was beautiful I laughed so hard that I farted. Loudly. FML
Today, a guy started complimenting me and calling me beautiful. Halfway through, he burst out laughing and said he couldn't do it. Who needs self confidence, anyway? FML
Don't touch me
Today, I weighed myself for the first time in a while and confirmed that I have put on a few pounds. I was feeling a bit down about it. I went to work and on arriving a workmate I hadn't seen in a while gave me a hug. She said, "I love hugging you, you're so nice and squishy." FML
Hit and miss
Today, I told my close friend that I have a thing for him. His reaction? "Oh, fuck." FML
Today, I went over to my friend's house. After knocking on the door, I was greeted by her hairy, 300+ pound father in his underwear. He then hugged me. FML
Top comments
d_hoffryn 0
That's what you get for fishing I'm afraid.
reset_button 0
YDI for fishing for compliments
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Comments (96)
squirlgirl91 0
maybe he was joking?
88sforlife 0
Yeah
JacksonCampbell 9
god dammit I hate it when you girls go all "I'm ugly" or "I'm fat" or "I'm gross" and so on. screw off and get a life.
hurray4jmk 1
ydi for trying to fish. idiot.
vanillatwilight6 0
you set yourself up for that one buddy
vinny2897 0
rofl aha aha fail.
iammoney 0
Why do girls do that? U tell them they look hot or beutiful or something then they say no im ugly when girls do that with me i just walk away it just annoys me cause i gave her a nice compliment and she just ruins the whole moment
courk94 6
That's what you get when you go Fishing (:
cwl727 33
You said it and he replied it's your own fault.
ty4nier 16
A simple "aren't you sweet" would have been good