Today, I was talking to my boyfriend about our new year's resolutions. I started telling him that I wanted to lose some weight. He interrupted me, saying, "Yeah yeah, we all know you're fat, whatever." He then went on a 30 minute speech about how he'd really like to take more pictures of his cat in 2011. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my fiancé and I had a fight because he wouldn't let me get what I wanted to eat, even though it was my money. He said, "It's way too many calories. I'm supposed to help you lose weight." When I pointed out that I had given up a month ago, he looked at me and said, "Yeah, I can tell." FML
Today, I was telling my boyfriend about how self conscious I am and how I obsess about my weight. He said, "Don't be ridiculous, you don't need to lose THAT much weight." FML
Today, I was hanging out with my boyfriend. Everything seemed to be going well, when all of a sudden he turned to look at me with a pensive and thoughtful expression. I expected him to say something important, but instead he just said, "I was wondering, how does it feel to be fat?" FML
Today, my boyfriend sent me a text that said, "I can't be seen with you anymore. You're too fat." FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend what he wanted for Christmas. He then told me that he would only tell me if I promised not to get mad, so I agreed. He told me that he wants me to start working out because I'm getting fat. FML
Today, my boyfriend admitted to purposely sabotaging all my weight loss efforts. When I confronted him, he said it’s because he doesn’t want me to get thin and turn into one of those stuck up, snobby, mean girl types that wouldn’t date him in high school. We’re in our 30s dude, get over it! FML
Today, my boyfriend used a laser pointer to show me where I needed to lose weight. FML
Today, I was talking to my boyfriend about how I'm self conscious about my weight. He looks at me and says, "Don't worry babe, I've always been kind of a chubby chaser." FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I gained a few pounds and thought I looked fat. He replied that I looked the same and that I shouldn't worry because he likes fat girls. I never thought I was fat before this. FML
Today, my boyfriend spent an hour lecturing me on how I need to ask for what I want. So I asked him to delete a crappy picture he'd taken of me the night before. His response: "No, you don't always get what you want." FML
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Top comments
purplecowchik 5
He's got a point. Almost everyone's New Year's Resolution I'd to lose weight. At least he was creative and came up with his own.
justsayfuck 5
Hmm.. if this is the whole story, that really sucks. If you, however, have been complaining about your weight for a looong time and never actually did something about it other than complaining, then I can understand he might get fed up with it.
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Comments (64)
wtfurcrazy 0
take pics of his pussy??? don't u mean urs :P hahahaha
El_patron 0
fail
meowmeowwkitty 0
double fail
ykthechild 0
Quadruple Fail
SeasonedLemur 5
Urgh... what a terrible attempt at humour!
iSCREAMMM 0
Epic Fail..
flockz 20
centuple fail. lol
ShadowRaptor 9
C-C-C Combo Breaker!!!
mulmanic 0
cute :)
kaayalbx 0
Lmfao, made my day, thanks ;-*
Doortje 30
OMG!! Is that you with Justin Bieber?!!! OMG, that is sooooo awesome!!!!! Jesus Christ, you are so full of WIN!!!!
DocBastard 40
Stalkery? Is that where celery is grown?
kaayalbx 0
hah yeeah it is.. i've known him since we were little. i have other pictures that one was just one of my recent ones we took.. and no its not photoshopped?
lmfao1643 3
Has he banged you?
kaayalbx 0
25 - excuse me? you're the one who needs to book an appointment with a psychiatrist, i didn't ever do anything to you. i never said two words to you and i never asked you for your opinion so i suggest you shut your mouth and go diet and exercise. thanks a billion boo.
lmfao1643 3
Wow I'm still waiting do an answer....
kaayalbx 0
house.
kaayalbx 0
bewp
DocBastard 40
kaayalbx, I'm not sure what you're saying to get yourself moderated so quickly, but you HAVE to realise that a mod is keeping a VERY close eye on this thread, so I'd keep your silly little mouth shut before that same mod shuts it for you. Just a bit of helpful, friendly advice.
Kesler_17 0
kaayalbx - Your picture is one of the shittiest Photoshop jobs I have ever seen. And don't pick fights with KaySL. He always wins. Always.
Doortje 30
Just for the record, Kaaylabx: because you seem to take me awfully seriously, my comment wasn't meant to be nice in ANY way. It's crystal clear you photoshopped your midget head into that picture, and just for that you are and will always be pathetic. I am truly horrified by your desire to be part of a hug with Justin Bieber. So horrified that I'm going to projectile vomit in my back yard now.
WeeGee_fml 0
Yah kaayalbx sirin is keeping an eye on this thread and has KaySL's back for...intimate reasons I suppose... ;)
thrAsHeRr9081 16
I know it's already been established, but that is a poorly done Photoshop picture.
mozeltov 7
this thread was awesome to read
hollee 0
hahahahahahahahahahahahaha
StrangerDangerr 0
Watch someone take your picture,( as in a guy) and switch their heads with Justin.
Bubblerider 3
I skipped through like half of this conversation, and kaysl you are automatically awesome for doing parkour, and I practice It too! ^_^
squirrelman 0
log the wonders of photoshop... that is if you actually do it RIGHT!
ashisthebomb 0
why isn't the picture in color? oooohhhhh it's because the picture is photoshopped and your skin color is probably different than the girl that is actually hugging jb.
simranlove 3
I know i shouldn't dwell on the subject, but lying about knowing justin bieber when its so obviously photoshopped is just ... sad. :/
rfngxhhshi 0
75 fine as hell ;)
joshijosh 0
hah This fml is added to my faves just for this comment thread. lol what an embarrassment. haha she probably hates her life now.
BahahahLOL 0
LOLOL FAIL
8bitdreams 0
Holy shit. KaySL FTW.
Molkerei 0
if you zoom in on the picture you can see the difference in pixel quality. this wasn't photoshop... it is obviously paint.
Zombies_Rule 0
This is an awesome FML. I'm a newcomer everybody. =p
NightMarePuppy 0
I'm an angry man.
skyttlz 32
hi
MoonRocks 5
Welcome
purplecowchik 5
He's got a point. Almost everyone's New Year's Resolution I'd to lose weight. At least he was creative and came up with his own.
purplecowchik 5
*I'd :( stupid auto-correct
Zombies_Rule 0
You must be on an Apple Product
Kenetic 0
iPhones are tricky little bastards.
Utexas913 3
Half of the comments I attempt to send via iPhone don't even go through; despite the message "Comment added successfully" appearing.
purplecowchik 5
Haha once again it auto corrected. Damn I meant to say *IS! And why yes, this is an apple product :)
Buchitoo 4
Yes 54. Same thing happens to me from my iPod. And then I don't want to post again fearing that the post may come up twice. ugh!
nlr 9
#5 i don't think your the only one with the autocorrect happens to me all the time but if you wanna see funny one go to damnyouautocorrections.com
Buchitoo 4
ugh I hate when the comments don't get posted. Anyways I'll post again.....92 you made my night with that website. it's so freakin funny!!!! lmao I just set one of my fav as the profile pic.
slushpup9696 12
Agreed, I don't know a single person who has completely followed through with the losing weight resolution.
KurtManson 0
nah my dad and mom did it last year
MissPo3s 0
What a keeper!
tyop_fml 0
Cats are cute.. even if they're chubby. Get over it :P
clarissa_Gyall 0
he called her fat..I wouldn't get over that!!
DingoCJ 15
Her fault for dating a guy more in love with his pussy than hers
macskapingvin 0
We all know the internet is powered by pictures of cats. He is choosing to do some good for webkind as his new year's resolution!
mulmanic 0
at least that's what you said..
macskapingvin 0
Yes, that is what I said, you are correct, and very observant.
KingDingALing 9
I'm waiting for a bunch of "pussy" comments since there was a cat involved in the FML. Cocaine is a hell of a drug. Don't do it kids. Once you try it, you'll be addicted. Next thing you know, I'm going to be sucking off some random guy for money to buy crack. Bring it on moderaters! >:D
Go_Die_in_A_Hole 0
Okay...
freenuggets 0
lmfao
Arachu 5
is he.. resisting their mod powers?? My God he's still here!
alwa7sh 2
What's with guys liking cats more than girls these days? am I missing something?