Today, I was talking on my mobile and walking into a grocery store saying, quite loudly, "Time heals all wounds!" right as I passed a woman with significant burns covering her face. I guess I was wrong. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I went to the mall. While shopping in a store, a woman bumped into me numerous times. Getting annoyed, I turned to her and loudly exclaimed, "Are you blind?!" Turns out she was. FML
Threatening
Today, I was walking down the street when someone started yelling at me, saying I was dead. I bolted, ran into a pole and when they caught up to me, said "Oh, wrong person." and walked off, leaving me bruised on the ground. FML
RIP
Today, I told someone “You too” when they'd said “Sorry for your loss” after I'd mentioned that I recently lost my dog to cancer. I realized what I'd said immediately and tried to fix it by talking more, which somehow made it worse. FML
Today, I was walking whilst texting. I thought I was going in a straight line but I ended up walking right into an open phone booth. A woman was inside making a phone call. I lost my balance, pinning her up against the wall. She thought I was attacking her and clobbered me with the receiver. FML
Today, I was walking down the street on my way to work, when an old lady's walking stick caught my leg and sent me crashing to the ground. She apologised for the accident and watched me stumble to my feet. I said not to worry. Just as I turned to leave, I could swear a smirk crept over her face. FML
Lawyer up
Today, I was walking out of a grocery store. I hit the button on my key to open the trunk, which hit an old lady just under her chin and knocked her to the ground. As she laid there, she pointed a shaky, bony finger at me and yelled that she would sue me for everything I have. FML
Today, I accidentally shut the door on someone who was walking behind me. After he opened the door, I turned, looked him sincerely in the eye and said, "Suffering". I meant to say sorry. FML
Are you OK?
Today, I walked into a glass door at a busy mall. Not only did I face-plant in front of a crowd, but I also left an almost perfect imprint of my face on the glass. FML
Today, at work, I decided to try and impress this girl walking behind me by holding the door open for her. As she was walking through, I inadvertently pulled the door too hard. It slammed against the wall and ricochet back, hitting her right in the face. FML
She definitely heard
Today, I had to go to the mall for a quick errand. While there one of my friends who works at a phone booth was there and I stayed for a little bit chatting with him. While chatting, a girl passed by. She was so pretty that I blurted out, "What a woman!" out loud. Turns out it was my ex. FML
Top comments
jgardner12 0
Big whoop, you were talking on the phone. If she cared she can **** off.
katherinebby17 28
that's not really a big deal you didn't know she had burns
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Comments (109)
katherinebby17 28
that's not really a big deal you didn't know she had burns
LordOfTheHobos 0
Maybe she viewed it as a positive comment? Inspirational? I dont know.
kel_riv 0
aw, what unfortunate timing. kinda hard to anticipate something like that, though. don't feel too bad.
jgardner12 0
Big whoop, you were talking on the phone. If she cared she can **** off.
ZleveL 0
I love your attitude! that's what I was gonna say too :)
182crazyking 9
that was epic
skreech96 0
I agree with 92.
CamBam97 7
FTW!
DrHeartSurgeon 15
Do you know how painful it is to get burnt, not to mention years of daily painful dressing changes and many surgeries.....
stonerjoe420 0
fake...
lnm701 0
Bad timing, but not really a big deal. It's not like you said it to her.
kyhole 0
YDI for calling your cell phone a mobile
penman91 0
I clicked "you deserved that one" simply because you called it a mobile.
beffburger 0
a "cell" is a stupid name for it. at least mobile (phone) makes sense!
audreyy062 2
well, beffburger, since this fml isnt worth commenting about, im going to comment on the fact that "cell" is short for "cellular" which comes from "cellular device." you probably knew all that but cell is shorter than mobile and we all know that humans are lazy so cell is more ideal. thank you, and good night.
kyhole 0
haha #8 you're my new best friend
EffinWhosLife 0
How the hell is this an FML? Nothing happened to you.