Today, I was taking a serious shit when the light bulb burned out. I am terrified of the dark and began wailing and crying. My mom had to pick the lock and get me out. I'm a 17 year old guy and captain of the Varsity football team. My little brother recorded it and plans on showing everyone. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was taking a dump in the bathroom. The lights turned off and I was too embarrassed to come out of the stall. The janitor walked in, turned the lights on and asked If anyone was there. I stayed quiet. He turned the lights back off and locked me in the bathroom. FML
Today, I sat on the toilet and fell off as the broken toilet seat slid off. As I fell, I grabbed the light cord in an effort to stop myself, and pulled it out of the ceiling. Now I can't use the toilet, and have to shower in the dark. FML
Today, I was at a friend’s party when I needed to use the restroom. I walked into a closet and couldn’t find my way out in the dark. I ended up knocking over several items before someone heard the commotion and rescued me. I think someone recorded the whole thing so I'm afraid it gets posted it onto social media. FML
Today, my fire alarm startled me so badly that I shat myself. FML
Today, my mom's intense fear of tornadoes caused her to break into the bathroom, drag me off the toilet while I was changing my tampon, and drag me to the basement with my pants around my ankles to join my father, brother, and my brother's best friend. FML
Today, I was in the shops and the lights all of a sudden went out. I got really scared for no reason because it was pitch black and grabbed onto my mum's hand. When the light's got turned on I was holding on to a random guy's hand. FML
Today, I walked into my near pitch-black bathroom and saw a person staring back at me. I woke my whole family up with my screams. The person was my reflection. FML
Today, I had to take my son to the ER after he badly messed up trying to light his farts on fire. FML
Today, I came home from school and ran to the nearest bathroom to go #2. In my hurry, I forgot to shut the door so I asked my older brother who was walking by to close it for me. After a while he didn't respond, so I looked up to see not my brother, but his best friend watching me take a crap. FML
Today, I had to go to the bathroom, but the door was closed. I waited until I was pretty much about to explode, and eventually yelled, "Are you okay?" and my roommate replied, "What are you talking about? Oh, sorry. I left the light on." How do you close the door and forget to turn off the light? FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
IreadFMLnaked 0
This is pretty good blackmail material. Better be nice to your bro.
lolzRaptor 1
If it was a very serious shit, you would have not taken your mind off of such a serious excrement, therefore there would be no crying and no FML, so it obviously wasn't a serious shit, just a normal one.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (257)
luvluv_fml 0
you deserve to be sent to afghanistan
wilson12 0
aww you poor thing. did your mom give you a bottle to calm you down
sockmonkey560 0
omgid why r people being so mean to the ob! i feel bad for him that his brother recorded it and stuff but being scarred of the dark is normal.
athos1237 4
I hope this is fake because otherwise you're a pussy. WTF! Why do people post this crap and expect any sympathy. Man up boy and grow a pair! YDI if your baby-bro does show it to everyone for being such a douche.
mehwhateverr 0
How about finish your shit and then go over to the door and open it. Then wash your hands.
BloodyRainbows 0
Wow, this site attracts an amazing number of assholes. Do you all just enjoy insulting others, or does it make you feel better about your own fears?
conan6 0
YDI for being a pussy.
kelsey_drives 0
YDI and your brother is amazing.
drimpossible 0
You're a big skipping rope. With pink handles.
Kiwi_Splash 0
How on Earth does he deserve having a phobia and reacting seriously towards it? Alot of you people are disgusting human-beings with no sense of understanding and respect. I feel revolted and annoyed by the fact that I live in such an ignorant world. ******* assholes.
Nubcake67 4
Thank you! You're probably the nicest person ever to go on FML. I don't think I'm that nice.
Kiwi_Splash 0
Lol, thanks! I wouldn't say nicest, but I know when to be realistic, mean, sarcastic etc... There are some things that don't really need a little more than just a brain to understand, you know?