Today, a brief survey of everyone I know revealed that everyone, including my parents, sibling, and best friends, thinks I'm gay. I had to do the first reverse coming out in history. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I came out to my parents and siblings as gay. They were very accepting and asked me why I waited until I was 25 to do so. I didn't have the heart to tell them it was their own homophobic remarks that kept me closeted since I realized it at 14, and that a previous coming-out to a parent was dismissed as 'a phase'. FML
Today, I told my friends I had been hiding something that I wanted to come clean on. My one friend responds by saying, "FINALLY you come out of the closet. It's about time." I'm not gay. I was just going to tell them my parents were getting a divorce. FML
Today, I finally got the courage to tell my parents that I'm gay. My mom said "Yeah, we know." When I asked how they knew, my dad, without looking up from the tv, said, "We've been monitoring your Internet history." FML
Today, my brother came out to our parents. They weren't super happy with it, but they said that it was ok since they still had a straight son. I don't know how to tell them that I'm gay too. FML
Today, I came out to my parents as lesbian. Surprisingly, they were OK with it… just as long as I still marry a dude, give them grandbabies, and keep the whole lesbian thing a deep, dark, shameful secret that we never talk about again. FML
Today, my sister gently asked me if I was gay. Turns out I've been without a boyfriend for so long that the whole family believes I secretly have a girlfriend. FML
Today, I came out to my parents. Their response was basically, "Oh, you’re coming out? But we’ve known for years. It was obvious, so obvious we never knew you were in the closet in the first place." FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents. My mother turned to me and said, "Wait you're actually gay? I thought you were just saying that to piss off your father." I came out to her when I was 16, and have confided in her about my past relationships. FML
Today, I got a text from my cousin saying that he's gay. I was thrilled and told him that I'm bisexual. He later texted me saying that his friend took his phone and said that. He also told all of our relatives. I accidentally came out to my family. FML
Today, after weeks of summoning up the courage to come out of the closet to my best friend, I told her I was gay. Immediately after she started cracking up, thinking it was a joke. I was so confused and nervous, I went along with it. She still thinks I'm straight. FML
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Top comments
lexos 16
At least you have some great friends that would accept you if you would actually be gay.
Alup132 22
I kind of relate. My sophomore year some friends thought I was gay because I never dated anyone, despite being like 15. Now I’m a high school senior and they know I’m straight but just haven’t found a girl I liked yet, so maybe they thought something similar?
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Comments (27)
Alup132 22
I kind of relate. My sophomore year some friends thought I was gay because I never dated anyone, despite being like 15. Now I’m a high school senior and they know I’m straight but just haven’t found a girl I liked yet, so maybe they thought something similar?
evilplatypus 39
Maybe you’re asexual or demisexual?
chessu 21
Or maybe they just haven't found the right person? I'm nearly 25, arguably, of average looking and wits female and I've also never dated anyone. Doesn't mean I've never been attracted to anyone or that I'm not interested in (having) sex. Just haven't found anyone I like and who likes me back/is available and not that I'm (or the OP is) asexual!
evilplatypus 39
Notice how I didn’t say that they were? I raised it as a possibility because many aces don’t know that it even exists until long after society has convinced them they’re broken.
Alup132 22
Like Chessu said, it doesn’t mean I’ve never been attracted to anyone. I am straight since I am attracted to girls but not guys, but rather just haven’t dated anyone.
lexos 16
At least you have some great friends that would accept you if you would actually be gay.
exileonmainst 16
Man, there has to be something in the water of Anchorage that makes for fml stories getting published. Either that or everything in Anchorage just sucks.
blahblabbity 19
“mom..? dad?? i’m... i’m straight.”
manb91uk 22
Are you sure it’s not a phase? Like the times you experimented with vegetarianism and skinny jeans?
joeyl1990 28
*uncontrollable sobbing*
mt21mt 15
What an insane assumption to make - "You aren't dating a woman, YOU MUST BE GAYYY!!" But, I'm not dating a man either, so using your logic I must be straight, right?
mt21mt 15
Personally, I'm not gay, I just haven't met any women from my generation that have anything more to offer in a relationship than a ******, when she doesn't have a headache. Companionship? I would get a dog, dogs are more loyal anyways. Someone to run into the coffee shop while I keep the truck warm? Nope, they have a drive-through. Someone to read a map while I am driving? My GPS will do that. Someone to look after the house while I am at work? Nope, houses are nearly autonomous now. Someone to raise kids? Nope, kids have to be in school at age three now anyways. With the inevitable rise of robots that will perform sexual tasks better than most women, all you women better step your game up and have something more to offer than just laying there like a dead fish every now and then. I'm not willing to risk half of the stuff I own, just to have a relationship in 2017/2018. Half of all marriages end in divorces anyway, and that doesn't say anything about all the relationships that end before marriage. Lmao, queue the downvotes.
kidcool97 4
its a good thing you don't want a women because women certainly won't want you
smoothlikejazz 13
Dang thats crazy
manb91uk 22
I guess you should start with that dude who thinks you’re his boyfriend though... He’ll end up naked and trying to kiss you before you know it!
BrotherPhil 35
Reminds me of one that happened at work once we were sitting chatting, and the sales manager commented that he had thought I was gay - not as an insult, just as an observation; one of the network guys started wetting himself laughing, and then suddenly went silent when I asked him who the sales guy had thought my boyfriend was.
darksinner222 12
Robert has the word life ever