Today, I was riding the subway to work. Barely anyone was on because of how early it was. Me and this one guy in a trench coat were in the same cart. His stop came. He walked by me, flashed me, rubbed his penis on my arm, and then ran away really fast. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, the subway was extremely crowded and I ended up with my butt in a man's crotch. I kept trying to inch away or turn a different way, but there was no room. He could have turned to face the doors, but didn't. He got an erection. I was on there with him for 20 minutes. FML
Today, I was on a crowded subway going home. My trousers were a bit dusty so I tried to dust myself off. As I was slapping the side of my leg I missed and hit a woman behind me in the ass. She called me a pervert and walked off. Everyone stared at me. It takes 40 minutes to get home. FML
Today, I was quietly reading in the subway, when all of a sudden, at a station, the man sitting next to me stood up, slapped me, yelled "Bitch!", and rushed off the train. FML
Today, I got the most action I've had in months when a stranger fondled my thigh on the subway. It was a blind man, searching for empty seats. FML
Today, the C-train was packed and I was stuck with a homeless man pressed up against me. He was staring at me intently, and two minutes into the ride he got an erection, which was rubbed against me at every single bump and turn of the train. FML
Today, I was taking the subway to school. It was around 6:30am and I was listening to music and catching up on homework. When I took my headphones off to readjust them, I heard some grunting. I looked over at the man across from me to see he was masturbating. FML
Today, a pervert was visibly playing with himself right next to me on the train. Then on the bus. Then on the other bus I changed to in order to lose him. At least somebody's interested. FML
Today, I was on the subway and saw this cute guy eyeing me. I crossed my legs, tossed back my hair, and raised my eyebrows slightly. As he came up to me, my heart started racing until he finally started flirting... with the girl next to me. FML
Today, I was leaving the train station when a man came up to me and asked me if I have an unlimited metrocard to swipe him in. I did have an unlimited card so I told him sure. While taking out my metrocard from my wallet, he grabbed my wallet and ran away as fast as he could. FML
Today, I took the subway. The man sitting across from me would not stop staring at my breasts, so when the train came to my stop, I said, "Nothing to see now, asshole." Then I noticed his white walking stick as he got up to get off. He was blind. FML
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Top comments
Rok_fml 0
What's traumatic about a subway footlong?
littlemisslee 0
oh man.... are you traumatized?
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Comments (290)
littlemisslee 0
oh man.... are you traumatized?
Rok_fml 0
What's traumatic about a subway footlong?
chazstah 0
...well think of it this way.. at least you made one person's day :D
Kyothine 0
DONT COMMENT ON THE FIRST POST TO GET YOUR COMMENT ON THE TOP
golfprova11 0
FAKE.... Theres always a shit load of people on those ALL hours of the day
plethora 3
That crossed my mind too, #52. But it could be a smaller local train rather than a shinkansen. #51: Calm the **** down.
rafaelaugusto94 0
bellow the fml it says japan... maybe its true
thereitgo 1
#6 is win.
xxrawr_betchxx 0
lmfao.
happyvalleygirl 0
Japanese subways are the most crowded of them all. Youtube it.
Orangeman69 0
#6 hahahahahahahaha
rallets 23
lmfao at Rok..good one
humorizer 14
Lol @ 51's irony. Also, good pun with the Subway. At least you didn't have to pay $5 for the footlong, you got it for free. I just hope they didn't get any mayo on you (ok, that may be taking it too far...). Anyhow, in Japan this isn't really an FML. Getting groped/flashed in Japanese subway is just as common as getting mugged/pickpocketed in NY.
pleasetryagain 0
Dude, even if it's new york city I've been on completely empty trains before whether it was because it was super late/early or it was the weekend at an odd time at the very beginning of the line.
ZombieKnickers_fml 8
I have to disagree with you there.
sarcasm_ftw 0
it's so common for things like this to happen in japan that they have a word for it, it's chikan i believe, they also have signs for subways where only ladies can board onto the train to prevent it from happening.
crybaby220 0
Lol!
tiffanyxo 0
oh, im sorry. i didn't notice =/
dowhatiwant 0
to #6, this happened in japan...sooo no way was it a foot long :P
JOELY_fml 0
totally agree
lifesucks5 0
stop ******* generalizing you assfuck, he lives in ******* japan, not new york city
ddldave 0
Who wouldn't be traumatized? He could of had an STD
lovely997 0
shit id be
lovely997 0
OMGSH HAS ANYONE SEEN 'MIDNIGHT MEAT TRAIN' guaranteee you'd never rife a subway again,
kewlz323 0
hahahahahahaha #6 so funny :D
Avaquin 0
hah, lol.
c3ns0r3dn4m3 0
hahah nice !
meatyorb 0
this is aisa remeber
aaaaa12345_fml 0
if it was in japan, it would be more like a subway 1/2 inch long
LP95 0
@#170: Cause you can totally get an STD by getting a dick rubbed on your arm...
oops122 0
lmao Haha #6
zoephan 0
Totally fake. I lived in Japan for 9 years and I know there is no such thing as empty train. They're not 24hours like NYC. Trains run from early morning to little after midnight so there always people. BTW, shinkansen is like riding airplane but more comfortable. You check in and get boarding pass and it has prearranged seating..etc. Only local trains (subways) are the ones that are packed.
Kiranez 0
#6 haha
shadow455 2
iv been to japan and iv actually seen womens only carrages on the trains but when i went the trains were all packed if OP is japanese she has good english skills to be able to type this out most of them cant speak english much
insertcoinforjoy 0
i don't think you'd get STD being rubbed by a dick on your arm... being a sexually transmitted disease and all... sorry for being critical. :|
KASHMIR_fml 0
EPIC WIN HAHAHAHAHA SUBWAY FOOTLONG LOLZ
cazens 0
ahahaha
Cake95 0
funny
justdanceinfranc 0
# 6: EPIC WIN!
beetman5 4
6 is made of win.
Anth194 3
haha this FML made my day
hqureshi 0
this is an fml because he ran away before she could flash her vajayjay.
David199619 8
Lol
am94_fml 0
hahahahahahahahahahahahaha best comment ever
Infamous_Hawk 6
lol sucks for you
EvilCupcake8361 9
subway people these days *shakes head* always lookin' to show their footlongs ;)
i_wuz_nver_here 31
noce
i_wuz_nver_here 31
meant nice @ 6
ihatestupidppl 0
Oh...my God. I'm sorry! Being from New York City I've seen a LOT of WEIRD shit on the subway...but (knock on wood) no one's ever actually physically touched me (or anyone else I know)! That is horrifying, FYL indeed!
Paigeth 0
Haha, nice pun.
ihatestupidppl 0
lol didn't even notice it till you pointed it out! (That's what she said!)
dasauto 0
FAIL. Everyone knows you cant say "That's what she said" when your the person who said the original phrase.
humorizer 14
And everyone knows that it's disappointing when people STILL haven't figured out the difference between your and you're. Your an idiot for not knowing you're differences between your and you're. Lulz. It feels so wrong typing that.
divineinstrument 2
Yeah you're not allowed to say "That's what she said" to your own comment.
happylittleman 0
They were making a joke. That's why they took the time to say 'lulz' and 'it feels so wrong typing that.' Who's the smarty now, jackass?
8trickster8 0
I am!
lmmmr 0
It's silly that people have "That's what she said" rules. I'll say it when I damn well please!
kewlz323 0
yeah you can't go say thats what she said to your own comment cause it just doesn't work that way, someone else has to say it see if i said thats what she said it would work but when you say it, it does not work.
AlbinoAzn 0
What's fail is the fact that you said "Penis" in dutch. Try using "Lol" from now on.
TNEBlover 0
report him.
xstaticdelta 6
she doesn't have a name
justchilling 0
Wow people are pretty messed up these days! I wouldnt ride the subway for awhile.
pogoman555 0
Makes a good story though
ninjaaninja 0
Dude. It's JAPAN. If you don't know about the train occurrences there, then get a clue.
waxstigmata 0
oh yes, because god knows everyone should have knowledge about Japan's subway...it must be lonley up there on your high horse...
NapalmFrog 0
*shudder* Yeah, I've heard things about the Japanese subway and stuff like that.
Books4Me 0
Uh, yes? It said this fml is from Japan on their story at the top.
dinosaursmoo 0
Uhh #55, that is /probably/ why she said 'Japanese subway'... o_0
LordOfTheHobos 0
55, you're an idiot.
sadistmonkey 19
um...55 was replying to 37....
singer101 0
ewwwww win, im in the top 10 comments
Knockyoudown 0
Euww.
j3nn1987 0
Roflao now that's funny!
emer_helena 0
There are some real freaks on the subway apparently FYL
abcdefghiloveyou 0
LOOOOL. That's kind of awesome. Should have punched his wang.