Today, I was playing video games at 2am. My guinea pig started squealing at me, and wouldn't stop until I turned out the lights and got into bed. I'm 20 years old, and I've let a rodent dictate my bedtime. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I woke up to a squeaking noise and the feeling of something furry on my cheek. I smiled, thinking it was my guinea pigs nosing me awake. Then I remembered that my guinea pigs were in their cage on the other side of the room, and opened my eyes to see the biggest rat ever staring right at me. FML
Today, around 2:00 a.m. I had just sat down on my couch when I noticed one of my cats poking at what appeared to be a toy. I attempted to pick it up to play with the cat when it started to move like a mouse. I squealed like a girl and woke up my wife upstairs. I'm a 26-year-old man. FML
Today, my daughter's guinea pig got stuck behind the wardrobe, squeaking its head off. I tried pulling the wardrobe towards me to free him, but couldn't take the weight of it all, so it fell over, smashing the TV. The guinea pig is fine. FML
Today, I made my way to bed around 4am after spending all night hanging out with my family. When I got to my bed, I started to clear a spot to lay down. Almost immediately, my hand touched something furry and cold and, fearing the worst, I turned the light on. Turns out my cat left me a half eaten rodent. FML
Today, I was awoken at 1:30 a.m. by a strange noise, and something tugging on my hair. I opened my eyes, to find a very large rat sitting on my pillow, chewing my hair. FML
Today, at around 12 a.m. I went to bed, happy that I get to sleep in because I had nowhere be in the morning. Sadly that came to an end when I woke up around 7 a.m. to my mom coming home and screaming because she saw a mouse. FML
Today, I was awoken at 1:30am by a strange noise, and something tugging on my hair. I opened my eyes, to find a very large rat sitting on my pillow, chewing my hair. FML
Today, at the age of 20, I still have a bed time. It is strictly enforced by my cat via endless meows if I am up past 11 pm. FML
Today, I was playing a video game that required me to hunt a few animals. My mom walked in, saw what I was doing, then went into her psycho vegan mode and started yelling at me. She basically grounded me for "murdering" pixels on a screen. FML
Today, I realized that the only one willing to hang out with me this summer is my guinea pig. FML
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Top comments
xoxoemmers 4
Rodents do know best
lovelydarlings 6
Guinea pigs need sleep too!
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Comments (341)
JinxosGirl87 0
Time to put his cage in a different room
zombiekitten87 12
It's because he wants you to get a good night's rest and make something of yourself instead of just sitting around playing video games. Guinea pig pellets don't buy themselves, you know.
TylerGowen 0
Either that or it just wanted you to get out and do something good with life??
blcarter81 0
At least the guinea pig didn't ask you to represent the west side...
DDpandaz 0
I see what you did there...
ashmichelle85 0
That's awesome and freaking hilarious!
13FTW 9
Oh really? I was up till 2 last night playing black ops. I race cars every weekend, used to be defensive captain of the football team, and am in school with straight A's. People who game generally do have lives so **** you stereotypers.
adrBB 1
Game Over.
Mean_Mr_Mustard 9
59- if stereotypes are true then what's yours, hmm? Everyone is susceptible to them, you are not an exception. They are like breasts, they are not always real. For all you know he could have gotten off at 1am, gotten home at 1:30am and then started playing games. His pet, pissed that his/her owner woke them started screeching until they let them got back to sleep. In short, don't judge people you know nothing about. It makes you sound ignorant.
Imachillifilliz 2
Hahaha. That sucks...
13FTW 9
Shit 96, he got off for a whole half hour?! **** yeah!