Today, I was out drinking with some colleagues, when one started ranting about some pretty sensitive subjects. There were some Latino guys nearby, and as soon as he said "I'm not racist, but..." I tried to casually get the hell out of there. We all got the crap beaten out of us anyway. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I decided to be responsible and call a cab to take my drunk ass home from the bar. As I climbed into the cab, I was quickly pulled back out and had the shit beaten out of me by a group of drunk guys who thought they needed the ride more. The police soon arrived and arrested us all. FML
Today, my coworker and I were swamped with coffee orders. I told him I would "take care of the blacks", and a customer who only heard that sentence screamed at me for several minutes about racism. FML
Crusin' for a bruisin'
Today, my friend was waiting outside the store while I bought a newspaper. Through the window, I saw two guys getting physical with him, so I went outside and they took off. I muttered, "Yeah, I thought so." They then turned around and beat the crap out of us. FML
Basic terrorism
Today, I went to Home Depot with my boyfriend. There were a large number of men at the front of the store speaking Spanish. As we left, he ran back inside shouting, "LA MIGRA! LA MIGRA ESTA AQUI!" They screamed and ran in panic. I am dating a racist scumbag who thinks terrorizing minorities is funny. FML
Today, I was at a nightclub when some dick squeezed the ass of the girl beside me. She whirled around and started yelling and slapping me across the face. I was dragged out by the bouncers, to cheers from the people around us. FML
Today, I went to a bar with a close friend. She got drunk and was feeling sick, so I carried her to my car to take her to her house. Some stranger accused me of drugging her and tackled me with her in my arms. She threw up on me, and he took off running without an apology. FML
Today, I got fired, apparently for being racist to black people. When I told my boyfriend, he couldn't stop laughing. He's black. FML
Nice try
Today, I got drunk until morning at a college friend's apartment with bunch of strangers. Some officials came in due to the noise and I tried to scare them away by pretending to sing a latin song of worship I made up, thinking they'd respect the gathering if it was a religious one. FML
Sitting ducks
Today, my friend and I stopped at a convenience store. She mentioned that it was was "a bad part of town", and I angrily reminded her that just because it's a poor area doesn't make it bad, and that she needed to be more tolerant. We then got jumped, beaten, and robbed. FML
This is America
Today, I'm a gay, black man who moved to a racist, mainly white, homophobic town for work. I've already had the cops called on me twice, and a group of teens yelled the f-slur at me unprompted. When I asked my boss if I could swap, he threatened to fire me. This is gonna be a long 6 months. FML
Top comments
Chellybelly92 14
Yea...when any sentence begins with that statement it's probably extremely racist. Sorry you got caught up in that.
ticklewhizzer 5
I would probably refrain from drinking with that colleague again.
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Comments (69)
Chellybelly92 14
Yea...when any sentence begins with that statement it's probably extremely racist. Sorry you got caught up in that.
IloveToLaugh143 21
At times like this, who cares about casualty? I would've ran far, far away if my drunk friend ever said anything like that. Feel better OP, and please refrain from making racist comments when your drunk. Please.
badluckalex 23
ikr! i dont get why so many people think that its ok to make racist comments just because they start with that..
Fmlsea 28
op wasnt the one who the racist comments .
TheGreatAlexande 12
Regardless of his extremely racist Jeff may have been, OP was only a bystander. Last I checked, being friends with racist people isn't illegal, and assault still is.
cumberbunny 17
I don't know why there were so many YDIs for this one! It wasn't OP who said the racist things, it was his friend.
nix1993 41
Gotta say, I think it's ridiculous that they beat the crap out of the whole group just because one person was being a racist prick. It's exactly that kind of thing that encourages these racist morons and makes them feel justified in their bigotry.
littlem91 29
As much as racism annoys me, and it must suck to be an american citizen, often born there, maybe for generations (not that it should matter, but to a lot it seems to) and be discriminated against... Now this guy will tell all his "I'm not racist, but..." friends how he was drinking casually in a bar and these Mexican guys beat him up for no reason, and they being racist idiots will believe he was totally innocent... the story gets twisted and told again and again, and it perpetuates the ridiculous stereotypes. Often violence makes things worse, ignoring it or an intellectual discussion, proving you're a normal person will do more in the long run. Hard as that may be in the moment. If I was OP I may have just joined in and punched Jeff...
gabe222 25
@80, he never said Mexican, he said Latino... There is a difference, so that would make you my friend a racist for assuming that the Latinos were Mexicans. Mexico isn't the only place Latinos come from. He also said it was his colleague, not his friend... I would have just dipped out the moment the idiot said that starting line, nothing good ever comes after that.
silencebabyy 23
#85 I think he's just stereotyping he isn't really showing any hate or discrimination towards a certain group
EdenCrystal 21
#85, I believe that he was talking from the perspective of racist Jeff.
nokturn_fml 11
Word. Also I understand racism is wrong and not to be harsh but if someone is being raciest you just need to ignore them you can't do anything about someone's beliefs or opinions. Beating the crap out of them will probably even make their opinions stronger
AquanTheDragon 5
Man, where's the Not Racist Butt when you need him?
Jared900DUmpling 30
Over at cyanide and happiness
AquanTheDragon 5
Well, I'll be packing my bags now. I thought a Cyanide and Happiness joke would be funny. I'll just leave.....Out into the cold world of the internet.....Yeah, you get the point. Bye, I'm done.
ticklewhizzer 5
I would probably refrain from drinking with that colleague again.
Yeshua_fml 19
Yeah, the guy sounds like an asshole.
tbro47 23
No good ever comes from that statement
tbro47 23
It usually gets you in more trouble when it's used jokingly
immortalhmars 14
No good comes out of a "I'm not ___, but..." sentence. At least you tried to get the hell out of there
Voij 16
Better choice than "getting out of there" would be to immediately stop them in their tracks. When one of your friends/colleagues/associates starts a sentence with these types of words, you should instantly stop them and tell them that nothing positive could possibly follow that statement, so they should just keep it to themselves. [That is as long as there're other people around. If you know that everyone in your group can stomach what's about to be said and that there are no strangers in hearing distance, then you can perhaps let it slide.]
elcee1987 18
Or really any sentence with an excuse, followed by a "but." (no offense, but...)
xXxJaGsTeRxXx 11
I'm not hungry, but I don't mind eating with you.
SexyQueen0905 24
A variation of the "I'm not ___, but ___" is "....but I have (insert minority group here) friends!" People seem to think they have a free pass to spout bigoted nonsense if they include those statements.
benmec 18
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Ain't nothing wrong with being a little racist. Everybody a little racist. (Honey booboo, 2013)
oddities 20
If the fact that Honey Booboo said that didn't tip you off that it's not a smart thing to say, I don't know what will.
TheAbstract 15
That really isn't something you should quote. Ever.
Bekll 31
#6, that's not even what she said. She was talking about being gay, not racist. And she misunderstood being gay as a boy cross dressing so she didn't even know what she was saying.
Bekll 31
#7*
gracehi 33
Everybody confuses prejudice with racism. Racism is hatred, whereas prejudice is a preconceived notion, such as belief in a stereotype. For example, you could be prejudiced in thinking that black people all love watermelon, but that doesn't necessarily mean you hate black people. Believing that black people are inferior by nature and should either be subservient or exterminated is hatred and therefore racism. So everyone is probably a little prejudiced, but true racism is very rare these days, at least in the western hemisphere.
benmec 18
Just joking guys...lol.
DippinGrizzly907 27
Of course you're "just joking" after being called out by everybody haha I saw the name Honey BooBoo and immediately thumbed you down... Guess I'm racist towards the Honey BooBooeins
rocker_chick23 27
This might come as a shock, I never judged someone by the color of their skin.
DraconicFeline 31
I say "everyone's a little bit racist" all the time. Except I got it from the Avenue Q song.
WackyTaco99 6
citing anything from honey boo boo. -1
mcrfan45 10
I agree with everything except the Western Hemisphere part..
thatnucca 36
Only racist people start sentences that way...
jas2 8
Not true, people sometimes use that phrase to make a casual observation that doesn't intend to be deemed racist but in fact, more analytical- so lets not label people here.
Razi_tail 25
So they didn't even stay to hear the rest of the sentence? People get their panties in a twist way too easily. Even though that phrase isn't a good way to start a conversation, it's not worth physical violence.
Setareh23 34
I'm pretty sure the sentence WAS finished (and pretty racist too) and OP was just too slow in his casual escape to avoid involvement.
datguy69s 21
You must've said something racist, it's your fault. Not an FML
nonononononono_fml 16
Probably should've gotten the hell out a little less casually