Today, I was on the bus heading home from school, when I noticed a ridiculously hot girl near me, checking me out. I was about to say something charmingly funny when I suddenly got a whiff of onions. Turns out she had turned around simply to catch the essence of her own fart. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while sitting on the bus a stranger sat next to me, farted, put his hand under his butt to smell what it was like, and then sniffed it throughout the whole ride while glancing at me. FML
Today, as I walked on to the bus, the girl I liked whispered something to her friend. Curious, I asked what was so funny. She said she never realized that when I got on, I shook the bus. FML
Today, on the train, a cute girl gave me her number. After maybe half an hour, she went to her seat and I went to the toilet for a quick but loud and painful dump. I opened the door and saw her outside getting bitch-slapped by the smell. FML
Today, on the bus, I caught the eye of this ugly, sweaty girl giving me a death stare through the driver's mirror. I gave her a death stare back. Only then I realized I was staring at myself. FML
Today, the girl who I have had a crush on for two years snuck up from behind me and gave me a hug. I farted very loud at the same exact time. FML
Today, I was sitting in a secluded corner of a coffee shop and felt extremely gassy. Thinking I'd be safe, I let out a pretty nasty smelling fart. Next thing I know, a cute guy is approaching me and asked my name, but all it took was for him to inhale once and he bolted. FML
Today, I accidentally farted while shopping. There was an awkward silence followed by a god-awful stink and a lady's little girl bursting into tears. FML
Today, my boss offered to give me a ride on her way home. Two seconds before getting into the car, I had to let out a fart. I didn't think the fart would follow me in, but it did. She rolled down the windows, and we lapsed into a silent, awkward ride home. FML
Today, I was riding the bus home from college. I was standing in the aisle and there was a rather cute girl sitting next to me. The bus came to an abrupt stop, I tripped, and fell into her lap. She shrieked, "Eww! Get off me!" and shove me onto the floor of the bus. Nice to know I'm revolting. FML
Today, the smell of my own fart made me feel hungry. FML
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Top comments
JoshTheMaggot 8
Don't you like onions?
SandraGee 7
I guess she made a "pass" at you.
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Comments (121)
JoshTheMaggot 8
Don't you like onions?
PeteyPablo12308 20
Yeah, and did you tear up?
sexybeastsexybea 0
how could you tell that that's what she was doing?
VianaJ_Garcia 14
Onions make me flatulent.
derpherp 0
Onions?! Yum!
StoryOfTheYear 15
39- Welcome to math class She was probably sniffing the air Sniffing+Gross Smell=Fart Smelling Yes, could be wrong, but obviously he was there and we were not
yahman123 0
**** tht chick anyways. right up her tight wet ******
jryan2 16
Btw, pretty sure beaver would ask you to smell your own fart. He caused a girl to kill herself by making fun of her and many people joined in.
gendakia 0
Do you like onions? :D
morgs1 0
she was rediciously hot smelling
FruityLoooons 8
HAH. Onions. ...nasty.
jakiwi 0
ditto ^_^
travis093 0
Obviously a fake. Everyone knows that Girls Do Not Fart!
3ph600v 15
My kind of chick
mazesm 11
that's my mom
babyyappld 7
California gurls they're unforgettable extremely hot but smell their own farts.....
fastbunny 0
I smell my farts all the time I'm so obsessed I can't stop duch ovening my self
varkey 7
how do you know it was hers? maybe she was trying to see who it was if it was, that's so nasty... why would anyone do that
Privations_fml 3
Oh my *******...
Troll1 0
biscuit
UpsidedownKayak 9
gravy
noobmuffin 0
Don't say the "****" word, kiddies.
bfad2010 0
just say the word mmmkay!
bigantennaemay 3
oh my mmmkaying..... no, sounds stupid.
bfad2010 0
it's from south park duh :P
gabbster95 0
hahahaha^
chippa 24
She sounds awesome. Go for 'er, OP.
talktomandybaby 8
how can pretty girls be so disgusting? im pretty(not being conceited) but i wouldnt turn around and sniff my own fart!! blehh!! gross.
jess6blondie9 3
um most girls don't do that....
mintcar 10
If Beiber asked you to smell your own fart, you would! Obsessive fans will do just about anything...
amsftw 0
um everyone farts. so get over yourself.
talktomandybaby 8
35 i would shut up because your ugly as hell and im not that ******* obbsessed that if he asked me to sniff my own fart i wouldnt i would definatley not do that idc if he is famous i dont give a shit so how about you all shut the **** up.thanks.
Focnr 0
Calm down, everythings gonna be okay.
talktomandybaby 8
im calm. they are just annoying as hell :) but thanks for caring :)
alexaaisabeastt 0
woah. I can't believe y'all are having a conversation about this. 13 I love the Biebs too(; and 26, I highly doubt Justin Bieber would ask a fan, let alone anyone, to smell their own fart. let's chill.
talktomandybaby 8
exactly my point so everyone can shut the hell up.
yesiyes 0
51if you think your soo pretty why dont you put a ******* picture of yourself!!..duhhh
talktomandybaby 8
and yours smells like roses? get the **** out of here boners.nobodys gives a flying tuck about you.
talktomandybaby 8
57 its called having an ipad and you cant ******* take pictures of yourself because it doesnt have a ******* camera.so shut the hell up...and im PRETTY SURE NOBODY ASKED YOU.
allmidnighteyes 11
ooooh, she mad.
Troll1 0
he would only ask for you to listen to him make some music, to which you'd gladly say yes. then he'd blow a cheek flapper.
talktomandybaby 8
YEAH I AM ******* MAD BECAUSE EVERYONE NEEDS TO SHUT THE HELL UP.except the other justin bieber fan(; and the little asian dude...because asian people are hilarious(:
yesiyes 0
oh woowww she has an ipad!woohoo,everybody cares.you can still put up pictures in a different way.AND IM PRETTY SURE I DONT GIVE A **** IF ANYBODY ASKED ME SHIT. :) its a free country,i can say watever i please,lo que se pege la chingada gana pinche retrasada :D
Sirin_fml 47
Christ on a kayak, would you all care to stop whining like a flock of teenage girls, and let the REAL users enjoy the site?
talktomandybaby 8
virvachiyahyah bitch.wanna swear at me in some ******* language.oooo.wow.everybody. she can speak another language.and coooolll hunny because im pretty sure i cant hook up my ipad to my computer.SO YOU SOUND STUPID RIGHT NOW!!!!!GET A LIFE AND STOP BEING IMMATURE AND STOP COMMENTING ON MY COMMENT IF YOU DONT CARE WHAT I HAVE TO SAY BITCH!!!!
nygunns1 0
you really sound like a dumbass. you can email a picture to yourself and save it on your iPad?
talktomandybaby 8
i sound like the dumbass? right...when im POSITIVE i have tried that broha.
yesiyes 0
oh i could swear at you in english too :) dont hate cz i can speak more than 1language..you dont need your fckn ipad to put up a freakn picture!!goshhh..i must admit your pretty stupid:]]ohh well,&the only immature one here is yourself for thinking your all that & talking shit to others behind your little computer(oh i mean ipaaadd).nigga pleeaaseee..
talktomandybaby 8
nigga please? im not black.hiding behind my computer? and your not. speak more than 1 language? nobody cares. im immature? nah hunny you are the one who started commenting on my comment in the first place.
Troll1 0
mandy est un homme. call em lyk I see em. u troll.
talktomandybaby 8
was that a compliment or insult? because either way... you made me laugh:)
memo619 0
70, trying to explain to Mandy how she's dumb is like asking a 6 year old an abstract question all she's gonna do is praise her looks and mock yours, kinda sad
yesiyes 0
how do i knoww your not a niggaa in the hood?i cant see that.. at least i have a pic not like youuu.. -___- oh & your the one that started all the rudeness,so how about a nice cup of shut the **** up?:D
5t3ff1k4h 45
Mandy is dumb, though. Actually, at the risk of making myself look like a hypocrite, you're all dumb for participating in this thread. Sirin said to stop. If you don't, she will ass-ram you with a ******* spiked baseball bat.
Sirin_fml 47
Well, I asked nicely. Sort of.
Troll1 0
giggity
Picking_Kuppies 0
I made an account just to say that #35, amsftw, is really pretty. I'm not a perv' or anything, but I just really don't like comment #45, and I can't believe nobody has said anything about it yet. I'm not trying to jump into this whole argument, but, amsftw, you're really pretty, and don't listen to 11-year-old fangirls like #45.
talktomandybaby 8
participating in this thread? hunny,you are commenting on my comment.
alexaaisabeastt 0
seriously. this is sad. like, I think everyone needs to grow the hell up here. this wasn't even about Mandy in the first place. this is about some weird bitch blowin' ass then whiffin it. so how about everyone shut the hell up, stop mouthing. stop whining and laugh. shit.
yesiyes 0
awhhh moderated?! -___- but i had a descent comeback! &ohh its pretty fun seeing her get all fed up >:)
alexaaisabeastt 0
that's pretty immature, 87.
yesiyes 0
84 WORD,this 11yr old just likes to put others down to make herself feel better.. && you are pretty(girl above) :)
amsftw 0
aw thank you. (: and I didn't even read what they said.
heroesgleealias 0
you are being rude and freaking out for no reason at all. you are the one who started all this negativaty. what is your problem? can't people just be nice and not make fun of other people. does telling other people off make you feel better about yourself?
WhiteFlagWarrior 2
every1luvsboners... I care about you.....
talktomandybaby 8
everyone needs to stop and im not getting all fed up, i have been laughing threw this entire thing... that bitch calling me nigga first of all hunnnnn im not black and i am putting people down to make myself feel better? um no hunny this isnt making me feel any better and im not doing it for my pleasure, i am doing this because i stick up for my self. im pretty sure not one of you ******* know me. so stop hating and stop judging...stop bring bitches and fighting...all of you commented on my comment and you blame me for sticking up for myself? im pretty sure almost everyone would do the same,so dont tell me im immature.
amsftw 0
and seriously guys just stop, grow up and graduate from middle school already. you shouldn't be one to judge, I'm sure all you little girlies here have farted atleast once, I mean come on chillll. the world won't end. like seriously.
EmperorPsycho 0
wow 6 moderated comments in a row! a new record!!!!!
lionheart822 13
wow I can't believe this thread has 27 replies and the fml is still "fresh" really people get over yourselves, everybody farts. it's a natural thing, it's not like it's the end of the world. btw like 8 people in a row have their comments moderated, how'd that happen? lmao.
randomaccess745 0
every1lovesboners always has the best comment.. the semen flavored bieber-farts almost made me tear up from it's funniness.
carnage1106 0
comment moderated
XxPurplePandaxX 0
lol somehow it's amusing to see people argue and get there comments removed 8x :o
TXjuggalo972 6
ladies, ladies please contain your orgasms please
TXjuggalo972 6
ladies, ladies, contain your orgasms please
TXjuggalo972 6
ladies, ladies, contain your orgasms please
TXjuggalo972 6
ladies, ladies, contain your orgasms please
WhiteFlagWarrior 2
Sirin, I went on your profile to see if there was a "send message" button to ask a question, but there was not. Is there a way to send messages to other users? (I just wanted to let you know, that to close out of your profile, I clicked the 'x' with my nipple)
Sirin_fml 47
You need to use the website version for private messaging. Incidentally, I clicked the reply button with my eyeballs.
cheex87 0
hahaha. this is all funny to me!
cheex87 0
hahaha, this is all funny to me!.. sorry if I offend anyone by my laughter.
hippiechick96 3
I love internet arguments :) they make me laugh :)
ubetrwatchBN 5
The best part was the fact that mandy's comment 55 immediately followed boner's 54. I lol'd. Trolls are funny, especially ones that are so ostentatious...damn, I fed it, too.
krazy_glu3 0
well then how did you get the picture of the tard for your pic? I'm not saying that you TOOK the picture.. but did you save it? I'm sure your have a profile on FB that you can save a picture from... just saying.. cause when I see that tards pic I automatically assume it's a 12yr old girl's account..... maybe 10yrs old.
C6Racer 0
Thank you, mods.
palltaru 0
Some like Justin Biever~~~
hihi1212 1
ur so annoying!!!
thesinginguy 18
you do know that you can just import some to your iPad from your computer, right?
kill_teh_bieber 0
m
kill_teh_bieber 0
you have to be comfortable with yourself to laugh at farts... otherwise you ain't gonna enjoy your man... who cares it's JUST a fart! my boyfriend and I fart on each other as a joke! Jeezus lighten up!
Cathrin 26
Why can't I thumb up moderator comments?
graceinsheepwear 34
You can private message on the mobile app.