Today, I was having some intense sex with my boyfriend. I was wailing so loud that my neighbors decided to call the police on us. According to them, it sounded like I was "being tortured to death". FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I was apparently really loud, because when we finished I heard his mom and grandma sarcastically imitating me outside. FML
Today, I was making love to my boyfriend. He put me up against the wall and I yelled, "Harder!" without thinking. I heard the entire house go silent, my dad and his friends included. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I heard my parents going at it upstairs. He said, "sounds like they're having more fun than we did." To make it worse, he crept to their door and put his ear to it, telling me what he heard. FML
Today, I was lying in bed listening to my neighbors have loud, and what sounded like, enjoyable sex. My boyfriend rolled over and said, "she sounds like fun" before rolling back over and going to sleep. It's been four months. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having it off in his den, I screamed at the height of my climax, and from the family room came the roaring laughter of my boyfriend's brothers. FML
Today, we had the police called on us for our loud sex noises. This led to my boyfriend making the joke that he’s so good at sex “even the police came.” It was funny at the time, but less funny when he told our friends. Even though I told him to stop, he keeps telling people, and it's pissing me off. FML
Today, I heard my next door neighbour screaming as if someone was trying to slice her throat. Her window was open. Intrigued, I went onto my balcony and asked if everything was okay, and if she needed anything. She and her boyfriend shouted back in unison: "We're fucking! Go away!" FML
Today, I had my parents over at my new apartment. As I was telling them how quiet and peaceful my new place is, we could hear my neighbors talking nasty to each other before launching into a full-blown sex ordeal. FML
Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. Trying to be sexy, I told him what I was doing with my vibrator. I heard a loud bang, followed by him shouting, "Why don't you just fucking marry it, then?!" and then hanging up. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when we heard a screech. My two cats were having it harder than us. FML
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Top comments
kingtz 6
You need to give your bf a medal!
perdix 31
CTFD! Making some noise can be genuine, but when you get to that decibel level, it just sounds fake. The neighbors called the cops to stop a defrauding in progress.
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Comments (76)
noeyolivia 0
no eww
mask724 7
oh & not to be mean, but that outfit does not do you justice
loveofyourlife11 0
haha! 42. that made me lol!
OMG_N3RD 0
42 Is kinda right no offense
OCDC 9
Neither do those Twilight posters in the background...
jess6blondie9 3
You guys are ass holes. There was no need for you to be rude to her for no reason. If you don't like her outfit, you could have kept your opinion to yourself instead of trying to make someone feel down on themselves. And 42, you shouldn't be commenting on what's wrong with other people's pictures when you don't even have one up of yourself.
Alicia17C 2
omg all they did was comment on her outfit, they didn't insult her. "not doing her justice" means she could look much better in something else, so she is attractive. don't get all butt hurt when no one said it to u.
jess6blondie9 3
It's still rude. Maybe she likes that outfit and feels confident in it, and here comes a group of people putting it down. She never asked them for their opinion of her outfit, they were just being rude. So you can Stfu and go back to the hole you came from. I'm sure if it was you they were saying that to, you'd hope someone like me would come and stick up for you too.
Alicia17C 2
lol what a dumb line "go back to the hole u came u from" ur a moron. and isn't that more insulting then dissing an outfit. look it's an ugly stupid outfit that makes her look pregnant, so she should stop wearing it. end of story.
perdix 31
CTFD! Making some noise can be genuine, but when you get to that decibel level, it just sounds fake. The neighbors called the cops to stop a defrauding in progress.
bribri1992 0
lol :-)
Phil135 4
Why did you stop commenting so often, Perdix? Your comments were the reason why I even looked in the comments section.
Okamichu 21
I don't know, I can get pretty loud and I'm all genuine, I cant help but make noise...
fatalkiss 0
Wailing? Who the **** wails during sex?
lowloudflush 2
I'm not 100% sure, but now I'm intrigued.
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
Whales wail whilst willy waves whale wang within water walls where whales willingly want whale willies washed.
TheNewGuy03 29
26: :O |the kid|
MyNameIsBruce 0
Insert 'your mom' joke here
j_cat187 20
damn it 34
seasick08 3
u should try it!
littlemisschat 0
hahaha exactly
MysticMint 0
Sounds like your boyfriend knows how to treat you right! ;)
j_cat187 20
good job
im_awsome 2
sounds like the neighbors were just jealous.
flipstar530 0
u have big lips:|. but ur still pretty:)
C6Racer 0
Fail^
billyXcore 0
Total win ^_^
drew2711 0
You must moan like a cow with a rake up it's ass.
CallMeHush 1
An image that I didn't need in my head.
ShadyFTW1 0
You would know what that sounds like? You sick ****.
PapaCool_fml 0
I used to live in a flat, I shared with my ex-gf, and our up-floor neibours, when they were on it, used to do funny lovemaking noises too. She was always and only laudly groaning when he started weirdly grawlling. It was funny. After a half year they quieten considerably. I think they add up 1&1
DocBastard 40
I assume you hid the whips, handcuffs, 14 inch strap-on, and anal beads before the cops showed up?
leeshxx 3
no they were hoping it would turn into a lame porno where the cop joins in
testthecoal 5
what about the gold plated anal sticks?
yuggi1 11
Spiked *****? You got to try it.
scotty122 0
win