Today, I was going through my daughter's contacts, except all of them had names from Harry Potter. I found the name "Mom." I was relieved I didn't have some silly name, until I realized it wasn't my number; it was her father's new wife. My number was under "Voldemort." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my friends took my phone and changed all the contact's names to characters from Harry Potter. I have over a hundred contacts and no idea who I'm talking to. I've been texting Draco Malfoy for 4 hours now. FML
Today, my four-year-old daughter called me by her mom's new boyfriend's name. Three different times. FML
Today, I asked my fiancé's daughter to use her phone so I could call mine which I'd misplaced. Busy with homework, she nodded. Only after she jumped up did I notice that she had my number listed with a humiliating nickname, and accompanied by a photo of her middle finger. FML
Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad used to stalk when he was in high school. FML
Today, I looked through my girlfriend's phone book and saw two entries with my name. One had "(cute)" attached to it. I checked to see if it was my number. It wasn't. FML
Today, I got a call from the guy I have been seeing. I wasn't him. It was his wife wondering why I have her husband's number. FML
Today, I found out my wife named our son after her ex-lover. FML
Today, I found out that my contact name in my girlfriend's phone is "Dipshit McFucktard". FML
Today, I found out that my wife named our son after her ex boyfriend. FML
Today, I lost my phone. I tried to call it using my husband's phone, but couldn't figure out which of the three Kates in the contact list was me. Turns out, two are co-workers and one is his aunt. I was listed under Satan. FML
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Top comments
stupidpplsuck 33
That's probably because you go through your daughters phone. No sympathy from me Voldy.
neeni88 23
Could it simply be because you lack a nose and not due to your "evil" ways as a Mom? If it's any consolation, if your kids hate you, you must be doing something right!
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Comments (209)
Bilover96 5
Don't take it personal
blueknight1st 26
That's what you get for snooping.
daboar 5
always lock your phone, people. it's not that hard to do
kobykai 3
From the childs perspective i would say that it was out of fun with the names. As for you, its possibly just another joke.
carebear808 12
Why were you going through her phone? Seems like a fitting name if you do this to her a lot...
worldclassrager 41
The creativity is great but sometimes it's better to leave well enough alone...
danigirl074 6
Never go through a child's phone without permission-she will consider you Voldemort now
whatwhyhoo 10
Kids deserve privacy. If you can't talk and get a truthful answers then is bad parenting.
socccer_chick_02 9
Not once did op say her daughter was a child. For all we know she could be over 18.
Hawaii84 16
That's hurtful but maybe you need to reflect on what you could have possibly done to earn that title and try to mend fences. If she is just been a bitch I'm sorry for that.