Today, I was fooling around with my husband on the bed. I was excited as he lifted my arms up in a seductive way, only to roll deodorant under my armpits. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was apparently tired enough to spray silly string under my armpits rather than deodorant. FML
Today, I was running late for work and grabbed what I thought was my deodorant. Turns out, it was my husband's foot spray. Now I'm at the office smelling like a combination of roses and athlete's foot. FML
Today, while being intimate with my future husband, I reached over to stroke his cheek. The light behind him cast a shadow over my chest, and it scared me so much, I screamed then I farted on him. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were in the shower, we began to get a bit frisky. That was until I lifted my arms and he immediately made one of his "Chewbacca Calls." He was referring to my armpits that I had forgotten to shave. FML
Today, I was about to climb on top of my husband for some fun time, when I stuck my hand in a giant pile of cat poop on my pillow. FML
Today, after some passionate love making with my husband, I accidentally farted on his leg. He shrieked and frantically began shaking his leg while screaming, "Get it off! Get it off!" FML
Today, I was getting intimate with my husband, and I tried to do a swift position-change like they do in the movies. I wound up flipping off the bed and busting my nose open on the floor. FML
Today, it’s extremely hot, so showering and deodorant does fuck all for my odor. I thought I could get away with having my arms pressed to my sides at all times, but instead, a boy I don’t even know physically lifted my arms above my head and loudly declared that I stank. FML
Today, I sprayed hair spray under my arms instead of anti-perspirant. I didn't realize it until I went to put my shirt on and couldn't raise my arms. FML
Today, I was getting ready for the school swimming carnival and was running very late. I reached for my deodorant and sprayed it on. It was only when I was at the pool that I realized I had accidentally grabbed the spray tan and covered my underarms in it. FML
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Top comments
calvo_07 13
You nasty
DrNuggetcase 3
(^_^)/ to ( ._.)
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Comments (81)
isabellejbowling 0
Haha ew
HighasaCloud 46
This has to be one of the funniest FMLs I have ever read. Style points to your husband for being sly about it.
HighasaCloud 46
Look on the bright side, at least it was your armpit and not a message to have better hygiene down there...
badgemaster 13
Take a hint.... Dammmmm
SarahRanee_ 6
ok, yeah, gross, shower, i agree. BUT. he loves you. because he doesnt care that your stinky. he just fixes it. most people would just tell you how it is. but instead of being cruel or making you self conscious(which of course you will still be self conscious anyways) he just fixed the problem. all in saying is, NEVER DIVORCE THIS MAN lol unless he abuses/cheats on you onviously
fullerkate3 17
That's ******* weird
EnJey0 19
Simple fix. Wear deodorant
marthamydear23 9
I hope you're taking the hint.
lucasj2345 7
omg. that is just so gross.
kevinsagirl2323 8
thst is just so gross. you must really smell bad for him to do thst.