Today, I was eating a brownie my grandmother had made, only to discover an inch long piece of what resembled dead skin in the middle of it. This discovery was only made after taking a bite and wondering why the consistency was wrong. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was eating some cake that my roommate's girlfriend brought by for us. I felt something weird in my mouth, so I stopped chewing to grab it. It was a fingernail. FML
Today, I learned the horrifying implications of my memory not being what it used to be when I bought a tasty-looking chocolate bar, only to realize upon taking a bite that I'd bought one before and not liked it one bit. FML
Today, I was feeling down and decided to eat one of my roommate's chocolate Pop-Tarts to cheer myself up. I took a big bite and thought it tasted "off". It was full of live maggots. FML
Today, I was celebrating my birthday when my friend gave me chocolate as a gift. I wasn't suspecting anything and ate about half of it before I noticed something strange. It turned out there were some kind of worms living in it and the chocolate was about a year after the expiration date. I got sick. FML
Today, I ate what was supposed to be a delicious mini powdered donut. The first one tasted funny, so I pulled out another one and realized that the powdered sugar was now in fact powdered hairy mold. Then I looked at the package and realized it was over a year and a half old. FML
Today, instead of reaching for some unhealthy food, I tried to eat some dates instead. It was all fine until I bit one in half and saw a rather large, squirming maggot inside. FML
Today, I visited my grandma. She offered me some chips in a Ziploc bag. I thought they were sour cream and onion chips from the look of them. They tasted funny, but I didn't want to be rude and I kept eating. I looked closer after a while and noticed that what I thought were chives was actually mold. FML
Today, I learned what live maggots in chocolate cake taste like. FML
Today, my daughter found a hair baked into the crust of her pizza. Grossed out, she put it down the garbage disposal, but I told her to dig it out so we could get a refund. After dinner, she came looking for the saved pizza crust. I was baffled about where it was until I realized I'd eaten it. FML
Today, I bit into a cereal bar and thought the inside was oddly damp. I took a look at it and saw a maggot worm wriggling around. Its friend was in my mouth. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
lendalynn 5
I just threw up a little.....
perdix 31
. . . and Grandpa's missing, and Grandma seems uncharacteristically cheery.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (136)
lendalynn 5
I just threw up a little.....
chippa 24
I just threw up a lot.
enonymous 9
Ohh Austin powers fajah... wait a minute... Wait... Get me the skin box... Ohh yes this a keeper quick save me from myself...
DiscoSlut 0
I think i pooped my pants
ifailplzinsultme 0
I just masturbated alot. Wait did I do it wrong?
BraBrando 0
Well knock me down and call me Susan, that's a brownie!
MyEpicDemise 7
Maybe Grandpa's "hiding" in the fridge and looks suspiciously separated. Hmm...
perdix 31
While Grandma feeds the evidence to unsuspecting accomplices, bit by bit. If you go over to Grandma's for dinner and there is just one sausage being served, take a pass on that!
xSummerRosaleex 1
I've done that before. It's better to just assume it's coconut and move on.
Keyman1212 14
Granny is falling apart, literally.
MissBunnyWillEat 11
Was I the only one expecting there to be weed in the brownies?
GraveRobber14 13
Maybe it was egg because she didn't mix it enough? Still that's pretty gross fyl
LiveLaughFML 10
i will never look at a brownie the same way. LOLJK.
skatingalyy 0
58- nope I thought the same! :D
Marcella1016 32
That's the most disgusting thing I've ever heard before in my life. And I've seen 2 girls and a cup.
X_Codes 11
You know, it's probably not actually dead skin, especially if it looks like dead skin after being baked in the oven for half an hour (or however long you cook your brownies).
birdfreak 24
Gross! I would have thought that. ?
WCARlover 35
What are you saying?
jamie72596 9
She was saying...
jamie72596 9
She was saying...
birdfreak 24
I said if I ate that I would have though 'gross'
taptaptapity 2
Yum-o!
IndiRae 9
Holy ****. Very few things make me sick, but I truly feel ill right now.
shortstuffs23 7
How does this even happen...
Leadamp 7
I feel sick. What did grandma say afterwords
chippa 24
Goldmember?
acethehusky 0
haha love that movie.
lemonkittens 8
That's nutritious
LakersFanatiC 3
Full of Vitamin C
ChibiGirl5 0
Your picture suits your comment lol
FarSide 23
Forget about the dead skin thing... at that point I would be more concerned about the brownie resembling a turd.
lemonkittens 8
It fulfills your body's daily needs for dead, rotting 85 year old grandmother flesh.
skatingalyy 0
18- don't forget protein!
teh_uber_muffin 3
Don't lie. You asked for another.
legendboy 0
Haha yeah i would
ohiyoly 6
gross D:
RainbowzSkittlez 6
How did it taste??
MissBunnyWillEat 11
Meaty.
ifailplzinsultme 0
Boner-rific
RainbowzSkittlez 6
How did it taste??
THE_A_TEEN 28
It taste like chocolate skin. Really now, you should know by reading the fml, >;)
Malkria 1
Guess whose never eating brownies!?!??!? ME!!! damn that sux though....