Today, I was dealing with a psychiatric patient with a colonostomy bag. She got agitated and ripped the bag from her abdomen and threw it at my face. I got a bag filled with poop thrown at my face. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was working as a paramedic when my patient's colostomy bag exploded all over me. I was covered in fecal matter, with 5 hours left on my shift. FML
Today, while working at the hospital, I had a patient with a blocked bowel. It was so bad, feces were entering into her stomach. While leaning down to talk with her, she threw up. I was both vomited and defecated on at the same time. FML
Today, I got projectile-vomited on while trying to administer meds to a patient. Twenty minutes later, a patient with schizophrenia threw his shitty diaper at my face. All this happened in the first hour of my 12-hour shift. I didn't bring any extra scrubs and I live an hour away from work. FML
Today, I held a container while a patient tried to throw up in it. She missed. FML
Today, I was changing a wound bandage on one of my patient’s buttocks. I forgot to initial and date the bandage per hospital regulation. As I kneeled in to write, the patient let out the biggest loudest fart directly in my face. The worst part? Some of it sprayed out, some on my face. FML
Today, my violent geriatric patient was trying to escape the facility. When I intervened, she poked my belly then told me I was squishy and that I might explode. FML
Today, my ambulance got called out for a "stomach pain" patient. Upon assessment, the guy really did have stomach pain. His colostomy bag fell off a week ago, so to stop the crap from falling out, he duct taped it shut. It exploded when I helped him up. FML
Today, I once again had to clean up a shower and bathroom covered in feces, because of client with incontinence. It smelt so bad that I couldn’t hide my reaction; the client saw my face and I could see the embarrassment on theirs. I spent the rest of the day feeling like an asshole. FML
Today, I had to check up on a 400-pound inmate who was very upset about being locked up. When I got to his cell, he threw one of his own turds at me through the bars. I took a hit. FML
Today, a colostomy bag exploded on me while I was waiting in line at the pharmacy. Yesterday, my shoes were peed on by a child while I was at work. FML
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Top comments
um_duh 0
What a shitty day eh?
lololol111 0
11 and 12, psychology is a completely different field then psychiatry
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Comments (130)
lololol111 0
11 and 12, psychology is a completely different field then psychiatry
lizzi02 13
I have Crohns Disease, and i have many friends with an 'ostomy bag...and thats just SICK =[ FYL
fobchick 0
omg what a ******* cum dumpster
penizulaface 0
#1 is kinda right. brits dont generally say poop. we say shit, crap, poo, faeces, excrament, chocolatee...
OwenC 0
#3 WTF!
Sessee 4
Ew D: You should have kicked a bitch.
um_duh 0
#11 - GFY
Itsallgoodhere 0
Um I hope you had your mouth closed... FYL
catatonicsleep 17
This is why I never wanted to be a nurse...blood i can handle, vomit to an extent but shit no way.
nuked 0
#19, why don't you just learn to spell?