Today, I was casually looking through my girlfriend's phone while she got ready, though she made me promise not to. To my confusion, I discovered that she had me listed as 'Saturday' in her contacts. There was also a Thursday, Friday and Sunday listed. I only ever see her on Saturdays. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I looked through my girlfriend's phone book and saw two entries with my name. One had "(cute)" attached to it. I checked to see if it was my number. It wasn't. FML
Today, my girlfriend got very mad at me after finding several appointments with "Amanda" in my calendar. Amanda is my psychiatrist. FML
Today, I decided to go through my husband's phone to make sure I invited everyone to the surprise party I was planning for him. There were a few I had missed so I called to let them know about it. The last number I called was his girlfriend. FML
Today, I found out that my contact name in my girlfriend's phone is "Dipshit McFucktard". FML
Today, my boyfriend sent me a screenshot of his phone's contact list, to show me the adorable photo of us he'd set as my contact image. I guess he didn't realize that a contact called "Side Babe" was just barely in the screenshot too. FML
Today, my seemingly normal girlfriend decided to erase every girl's name out of my phone. Family and all. FML
Today, I was reassuring my girlfriend that I wasn't cheating on her because I was sneaking around. I'm actually just planning a surprise birthday party for her. During the reassuring, I accidentally called her by another girl's name. FML
Today, I asked my fiancé's daughter to use her phone so I could call mine which I'd misplaced. Busy with homework, she nodded. Only after she jumped up did I notice that she had my number listed with a humiliating nickname, and accompanied by a photo of her middle finger. FML
Today, I woke up, thinking it was going to be a good day. However, when I looked at my phone, I saw that my girlfriend had sent me an obscene number of angry messages, which are still coming in, because I forgot to say goodnight to her last night. FML
Today, I had a date with a girl I'd been seeing for about a month. When I got home, I saw her Facebook status changed to "In a relationship." This made me kind of excited, until I realized it wasn't with me. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
DEXter501 0
This is where you simply switch up all those numbers and have her basically reveal it to everyone herself.
KVKdragon 26
ouch. maybe you should dump her. looks pretty clear that she has other weekly hookups besides you. if you do though, don't mention the phone. otherwise, you'll be at fault and seem like the insensitive one to others.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (201)
Alpha35 4
GET THE BITCH PREGNANT AND THEN SHE WILL HAVE TO LOVE YOU!!!!!!
Kitten16 0
YOU ASKED FOR IT!
sirphacalot 0
it's amazing that you're even writing looking for advice dude. just get the hell out of her life and let her twiddle her thumbs on Saturdays!
ThomwithanH 0
Dump her ass, she sounds like a *****. Before my fiance died, we had a "no secrets" policy in our relationship, everything we had was shared freely because we trusted each other so much.
Squttnbear 0
omg dude thats horrible. but like someone said, at least you got saturday.
letmethinknow 0
that's awesome. sad for you...but awesome.
biskitbukit 7
You dick, you promised!
Softballsam11 0
This kinda complexed me
katiebethss 0
wow. what a girl douche.
arakay 0
That *****!