Today, I was babysitting four kids. I turned the TV on for them, and set the youngest on my lap. She started giggling and pointing at every single pimple I have, exclaiming "Boo-boo!" This went on for half an hour. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was watching my 2-year-old sister in the bathtub. As she was splashing, she stopped, and pointed at the "owie" on my head. I told her it was okay, and that it was just a pimple. She said, "Wow, you have a lot of pimples!" FML
Ewwwww
Today, I was babysitting a little boy. I opened up a new bottle of bubbles and it was all goopy and gross so I said, "Eww!" The boy then asked, "What's "ew" mean?" I replied, "Something gross and yucky." Then he pointed at my face and say "Ew! Ew! Ewwww!" FML
Be warned
Today, I was babysitting a three-year-old. She asked me what was wrong with my belly. I had to explain to her that I'm just fat. Twice. FML
Catch!
Today, I was babysitting my baby cousin. I was lying on my back playing with her, while holding her up in the air. As I was doing that, I made cooing noises and funny faces to get her to laugh. She laughed and threw up in my mouth. FML
Today, a little girl pointed to the acne on my face and said to her dad, "Look at how many mosquito bites she has on her face!" FML
Nice of her
Today, I was sitting on the couch with my 5 year-old on my lap. All of a sudden, she turned to me and said, "Daddy, I love your boobies. They're a good pillow." My own kid just called me fat. FML
Today, I babysat a 10 year old from hell. She kept insulting me, saying I have tiny boobs, that boys must hate me, and that I'm ugly. I eventually got fed up and put her to bed. When her parents came back, she ran out of her room in tears and told them I'd beaten her. They believed it. FML
Today, my 7-year-old daughter came up to me in a noisy mall and said "boo-boo" pointing to her hand. Not paying enough attention, I kissed her hand to make her feel better. She grimaced and said "No dad, bird poo." FML
Get me out of here!
Today, I hired a babysitter for my two kids for the evening. When I came home, I found her sitting on the floor, crying with a full bowl of popcorn, watching a kids' movie. Apparently, my six-year-old had decided to re-enact every scene from the movie, and she couldn’t take it anymore. I had to hug her and assure her that she was doing a great job. FML
Today, while babysitting, the oldest little girl who is 7 went through my purse. She pulled out a half empty bottle of lube. She asked what it was and I told her lotion. I went to the bathroom and when I came out, the bottle was empty and there were 4 kids covered in lube. Then their mom came home. FML
Top comments
NoWayLady 13
That's a lot of pimples.
DocBastard 40
The funniest part is that this youngest kid is 16. Oh, those crazy teens.
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Comments (81)
DocBastard 40
The funniest part is that this youngest kid is 16. Oh, those crazy teens.
DeadxManxWalking 27
I'd say that's actually really cute
SWhimsynBubbaS 14
Better than someone older going up to you and pointing out all your pimples counting as "nasty break-outs you need to fix" or maybe something even a little worse right?
perdix 31
Sounds like a *lowers sunlasses* zitty zituation.
Forlorn420 9
Sounds like *doesn't lower sunglasses* You didn't get the memo bout these jokes
Ajwc101 24
37 - Thumbs down because your comment is stupid and pointless.
Metallica36176 16
And you needed to comment that why? That's why they have those fancy vote buttons.
Kallian_fml 21
50 - Thumbs down because your comment is stupid and pointless.
holyshitbatman 20
you could always take her off your lap...common sense isn't so common, is it...?
Metallica36176 16
See that's the first think I thought. Take the kid off your lap and move so she stops. Turn her attention.
fairieluv04 17
My medication breaks me out, and my two year old did the same thing, once, while I was trying to put him to sleep. I agree it's aggravating. Especially if you can't help it.
olpally 33
Ugly Betty with pepperoni face?? :/ never a good combo... Those meddling kids... Fyl.
LYS92 6
Little kids are more honest then we want lol
JuliannVo 11
*pokes all pimples* must be fun to the kid o-o
Feverrotes 15
Whenever I see an FML like this, it makes me wonder just how many people from the earliest days of FML are still around - you know, the days when everyone would call out OP for using "proceeded" in the wording of the FML.