Today, I was at a tennis match and it was really hot. I took off my shirt to cool down. A member of the staff then tapped me on the shoulder and told me that my "bare breasts might offend someone." I'm a man. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was working in the yard and took off my shirt. My neighbor yelled, "Nice tits!" I'm a dude. FML
Today, my boyfriend's parents came over. It got hot, so I took off the jacket I was wearing, but I forgot I wasn't wearing a shirt underneath. FML
Today, I went to my local pool. I lay down in a chair and started tanning. About 30 minutes later, a lady came up to me and said, "Put that away, you pervert, there are children here!" I had a hole in my pants and my penis had started to poke through. FML
Today, I went into a crowded store and tried out a blazer. I was thinking to myself how hot I looked in it when the manager tapped me on the shoulder and politely said, "Excuse me sir, that's a ladies' blazer." FML
Today, at a pool party, I had forgotten to bring a swim suit, so I went in in my bra and shorts. After everyone screaming and telling me to put my shirt back on, I asked, "Why? It's the same as a bikini." My best friend told me it was because no one wanted to see me topless. FML
Today, while helping out at a retirement home, I had to get a book off a bookshelf. When I reached up, my watch got stuck on my shirt, resulting in my shirt lifting up. I just flashed my man-boobs to at least 20 senior citizens, and one of them even asked if he could have a feel. FML
Today, while I was on stage dancing for a competition dress rehearsal, my top fell off, exposing my breasts. I was really embarrassed, but fortunately no one said anything about it. That is until a kid in the audience came up to me and said, "That was a disappointment." FML
Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML
Today, I was in the gym when I noticed three trainers who worked there staring at me. Thinking that they were checking me out, i turned the speed on the treadmill higher. Finally one of the trainers came over, and asked me to leave until I got a sports bra that actually worked. FML
Today, I went for a run and took my shirt off part way through. The next person I saw was a nine year old girl playing outside her house. She looked at me and said, "Ewwwwww! Gross!" FML
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Top comments
Quest_ 13
Why are female bare breasts offensive?
Jimboom 12
Well old chap, it is a tennis match and things are a bit more civilized there. We don't go around bearing ones chest willy nilly. I mean whats next... a man going around selling hot dogs and peanuts in the stands??? You sir OP are uncouth barbarian of the highest order!
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Comments (64)
RealityFracture 0
if I can't take off mine, why should you get to take off yours? Suck it up, a-hole.
Flippy04 0
You can take it off though :P. There's no law against going topless
528Alice491 3
Actually there is. A woman can be fined (at least in the United States) for indecent exposure because the breasts are considered reproductive organs. There's actually this bad ass group of chicks that protest topless. Personally I think everyone should keep their shirt on, but it's definitely something that should be equal no matter the sex of an individual. On/on or off/off. No half and half bullshit.
Roberto22 0
Maybe this will get you off your fat lazy arse and have a walk now and again?
KikiThePug 0
Mmmm... moobs. ;D
tyghl55 4
You're a fat man
528Alice491 3
What does being a man have to do with not offending people? Obviously people don't want to see that. No offense, but it's bullshit people assume a woman's naked chest is more offensive than a mans. Keep your shirt on. If we can do it, then so can you.
mullisupreme 16
still and even more offending!
clubcoffee 9
Well if I'm not allowed to get my **** out, neither should you, regardless of your gender.
judea95 16
I'd be more offended by a fat guys boobs than a woman's. it doesn't matter what gender you are, if you're that overweight, it's offensive.
hegchog12 18
126. If your that judgemental, you're offensive
theflameprincess 7
Either both men and women can walk around without shirts, or neither can. To say otherwise would be sexist.
thisismyhead 25
Finally, some equality! Hahaha, no but for real I don't want to see any breasts in public, male or female, big or small. It's just like saying, "If males can go shirtless, so can women", but the other way around!