Today, I wanted to work out the volume of my penis and did so on the first piece of paper I could find on my desk. After I finished the calculations I realized that the other side of the paper was in fact my school report. It's the only copy I have. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my son got expelled after using the photocopier to photocopy his penis. He then used the copies to replace every directional arrow posted throughout the school. FML
Today, my friend made the effort to draw a penis on every page in my analysis textbook in pen. I have to return this tomorrow. FML
Today, I had a major digestive emergency while at work. I rushed to the bathroom, just to realize there were no toilet paper rolls left. In a moment of desperation, I used the last few pages of my notebook to make do. Now I’m terrified of what’s going to happen if my boss ever asks for the reports I wrote in that notebook. FML
Today, after retyping a 22-page report for work because the orginal had gone missing, i realized I had used a different laptop the first time. I now have 2 copies of the same report, both of which are late. FML
Today, I worked up the courage to give a guy my number. I wrote it down on a piece of paper, tore it in half and gave it to him. Later, I noticed I'd given him the wrong, blank half. FML
Today, I gave my son a bollocking for losing a very important paper that I needed for work. I've just found it in my right pocket. FML
Today, I turned in my homework. Too bad I accidentally handed in the printed answer sheet I found online to copy from. FML
Today, my friend and I doodled on a sheet of paper trashing our English teacher. Later, I went to English class, and my teacher asked for us to take out a sheet of loose sheet of paper and write an essay. It wasn't until I had written on the whole front and flipped to the back that I realized I was using the doodle sheet. FML
Today, I was looking over the schedule for errors and circled a group of mistakes before handing it to my manager. When she handed it back to me, she gave me a weird look and I immediately noticed that the group of numbers I had circled formed a giant penis shape on the paper. FML
Today, I had nothing better to do than make a penis out of silly putty. FML
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Top comments
SOILEDIT 51
You'd have to be so ******* bored/baked out of your mind to decide to find the volume of your penis.
Frabens 1
YDI for putting something like that on a piece of paper without checking the other side first, especially since you'd (probably) recently done a school report in your work space.
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Comments (76)
MushyPotato 2
just photocopy it?? lol?
RichardPencil 32
That would just get him the AREA of his penis.
Dave_Davington 34
The report, not his pork sword.
DeadIllusion 7
So I'm at lunch reading these comments and I got to yours and snorted so hard now people are looking at me and I can't contain my laughter. Well said and timed, hahaha
OhPuhleeze 23
Today, I read an FML that really deserved a YDI. Too bad the options were 1) Yes your life sucks, and 2) It could've happened to me. FML
Cali 57
Problem solved!
ollygollymolly 6
YDI
melana09 19
Check to see if there is a copying machine somewhere close by. Only suggestion I have for you.
BadKitty13 28
YDI.
RichardPencil 32
Vp = (pi/4)Ds^2*Ls + (1/2)(pi/6)Dh^3 Was that so ... hard? Be careful with your unit, um, I mean units.
JoshTheYeti 0
I have no idea kind of equation that is for but the volume of a cylinder is Base Area times Height or, Pi×Radius squared × height.
Nina825 21
Well I interested if your calculations were worth messing up the paper...
yerawizardlizzy 27
Unless you wrote "Volume of my Penis" above it, is anyone really going to know? I don't look at calculations and say "Yes, he was clearly trying to find the volume of his penis."
VapeNation4Realz 4
My question is why is this the worst thing? I mean its just a bunch of math and scribble numbers on the back, right? There's not actual writing on it.. Right..?
nider 19
How come no one has asked whether this was the flaccid or erect volume?