Today, I wanted to sleep in after a rough week, only to be woken up by my roommate's sex screams and the pounding of her bed against the wall. Earplugs did not help. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, for the second week in a row, I woke up to the sound of my awful upstairs neighbors having sex between the hours of 1 and 3 AM. Their bed is so noisy, and earplugs barely help. At this point, based on the rhythm of their bed squeaking, I can tell when they're about to finish, and I hate it. FML
Today, I was woken up at 2 a.m. by my roommates throwing a party down the hall. I put some earplugs in so I could get some rest for my 8 a.m final. They worked really well, so well in fact that I didn't hear my alarm and woke up at noon. FML
Today, I listened to my roommate having sex from 3 a.m. until 6 a.m. When I looked over at my girlfriend, who must have thought I was sleeping, I noticed she was masturbating. FML
Today, I decided to watch some porn before bed. The lights were off and my roommate was already asleep behind me. I put on my noise-canceling headphones and turned up the volume all the way. After a few strokes my roommate got up and plugged in the headphones for me. FML
Today, I have a cold, and was stuck sleeping in bed. My roommate decided to wake me up by sticking headphones in my ears and playing heavy metal on full volume. This is the third time this week. FML
Today, after months of living with my roommate's horrific snoring, I looked over to see her sleeping quietly. Elated that I might actually get a full night of rest for once, I went to bed. Just as my eyelids began to droop, she started making vile hissing sounds. Yes, hissing. FML
Today, I walked in on my roommate having sex in my bed, because apparently hers is "for sleeping only". FML
Today, my roommate's extremely loud and obnoxious alarm went off six times, waking me up each time, before she finally gave up on hitting the snooze button and went back to sleep for good. FML
Today, after struggling for hours to fall asleep with my husband's rather rattling snoring, I finally managed to drop off… only to be rudely awakened an hour later by my husband elbowing me in the face in his sleep. FML
Today, I've had no sleep. Why? Because my housemate has a new girlfriend and the walls are too thin. After round three of them shagging, I was exhausted from holding my breath each time the new girlfriend screamed. I also realised that was the closest I'd been to sex in months. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
A good three-way would have helped to smoothen out that week.
wozer 0
sounds like her roommate had it pretty rough too
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Comments (56)
Biatche 0
3692929177th!!!!!¡
Mortanious 0
Lame, YDI.
blland 0
i bet your roommate couldn't sleep when YOU had your rough week!
gpstyne 0
join in says what?
xerbrus 14
what
Grangoire 0
Ha! EASY fix; put your speakers up against the wall turn them on high, connect them to your computer then search YouTube for "screaming pig" (the one with the lady holding the pig). :-O
kagome43210 0
hmmmm find a new roomate
Harrywhat 0
YDI for being a jealous virgin and having crappy ass walls.
956TXking 0
you should have gone to their room grabbed the girl and swing her from the hair a couple of times.
perdix 31
I'm not an expert in female anatomy, but I think it would be very difficult to ********** satisfactorily with earplugs. Invest in a proper vibrator.
Gitsandshiggles 0
grow a pair and tell em to stfu