Today, I walked into my bathroom, only to find my dad passed out on the floor with his pants around his ankles. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house, when I needed the loo. The door was ajar, so I walked into his bathroom, sat down, and started to pee. I then looked up to see the shocked face of his dad sitting naked in the bath. FML
Today, I woke up and went to the bathroom, only to find my dad sitting on the toilet, blind drunk. He screamed "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!" at me. I just wanted to shave. FML
Today, I heard my dad screaming in the hallway. Thinking he was having a heart attack I ran to the hall without looking where I was going. I slipped and slid towards my dad in what turned out to be a mass quantity of diarrhea from one of my two dogs. He was screaming because he stepped in it. FML
Today, in the wee hours of the morning I decided to make a naked dash to the bathroom, unfortunately, my dad decided to do the same thing at the exact same time. FML
Today, I found my dad using my bathroom. Why? Because he "had to take a crap" and didn't want to stink up his own bathroom. FML
Today, I walked into my upstairs bathroom to find my mom's new boyfriend eating soup, naked on the toilet. In shock, I stepped back and fell down a flight of stairs, backwards, and hit my head on wall, leaving a dent in it. FML
Today, I passed out in the shower with my boyfriend. He just left me there. FML
Today, I slept in late and when I woke up, thought I was the only one in the house so I decided to walk around the corner to the only upstairs bathroom naked. My dad also slept in, also thought he was the only one in the house, and also decided to walk to the bathroom naked. We collided. FML
Today, I went into the bathroom only to discover my dad on the pot. “Oh, sorry”, I say and turn to leave. His reply, “Oh I don’t mind. Just having a shit here.” FML
Today, I walked into the kitchen to find my father trimming his pubes over the bin with our kitchen scissors. FML
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Top comments
MeanBeagle 22
well he ALMOST made it
silvercamaro 22
He could be passed out drunk, so walking away and leaving him alone could actually result in him dying.
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Comments (82)
spatula232 25
That's when you turn around and walk away...
vcruzM14 8
No.. You ask for an explanation
silvercamaro 22
He could be passed out drunk, so walking away and leaving him alone could actually result in him dying.
whatsittoyabitch 15
Did he at least had his underwear on?
katieemerr 15
I disagree #1 OP doesn't state anything about the dads health, anything could be wrong with him and even though it's not pleasant I think it's their duty to make sure he's okay and help if needs be..
Mauskau 36
He could have had a heart attack or something, you don't just leave someone there when they're passed out.
foxwasalamb 24
or if he is drunk, he can puke and choke on it. and die. x.x
LowExpectations 30
#36 is right, you can't just leave him there without drawing some penises on his face. But seriously though, if you truly care about someone you don't leave them unconscious by the toilet.
Ichiya 29
Yes you drag him into the dining room and make him into a lovely center piece.
incoherentrmblr 22
That must've been one powerful sh**...
BasedComment 15
Turn down for what!
jjjoey4 15
I understand, going to the bathroom when you're drunk is tough and takes it out of you!
greg84_fml 21
Actually you're right. Going number 2 very drunk can make you pass out. Happen to a friend on mine.
MeanBeagle 22
well he ALMOST made it
hard_candy 25
OP's bathroom must have been closer than his own, too.
VeganDarkLight 31
They probably share it?
meatpopsicle69 7
Actually, #12 had the right idea. OP did say 'my bathroom.' Correct me if I'm wrong, but if I shared the bathroom with someone I would have said, "our bathroom" or "the bathroom."
LowExpectations 30
I'm getting the feeling this happened in OP's own home.
christianmaxvill 17
Hope he's alright!
thinblue32 15
Must have been some party.
JonBall 17
Sounds like your dad likes to party.
ulissey_fml 22
When you drink so much you can't do the maths anymore, you can just do the mat.
LowExpectations 30
Sir, you are drunk, leave the internet alone and call it a day.
bustyou 15
The follow up has to be epic
pinkster2014 25
I agree. There should be a follow up! I want to know if the dad's okay!
agghhh 7
is he ok?.. .-.
devildog562 33
Imma party with your pops . Makes me look sane with my pants off.