Today, I video-chatted with my mom and showed her my new, very short haircut. My dad walked in, took one look at me and said, "I can only attribute this to penis envy," and walked out again. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got my long hair cut in a short pixie cut. When my five year old daughter saw me she laughed and proclaimed 'You look just like a man!'. That afternoon I got a concerned call from the school. My daughter has told everyone 'mummy has gone away, I now have two daddies!' FML
Today, I noticed that my facial hair had grown by an acceptable amount. I spoke to my Dad and decided to show him, thinking he would approve of my manliness. His exact words when I showed him were, "Nah, son. You just look like a lesbian." FML
Today, I asked my dad to give me a haircut. After 20 minutes of "fuck"s and "shit"s, he gave up and just shaved my head bald. I pull off the look so badly that two people I don't even know have already told me I look like a psychopath. FML
Today, I came to the decision that I needed some variety in my life, so I decided to get a haircut. My mom insisted that she could do it and that she had experience because she cuts my dad's short hair. I had thick, long hair. Now, my hair is uneven, ugly and short. FML
Today, one of my dad's work friends came over. As he was leaving, he complimented my dad on having three "strapping young boys." I informed him that I'm a girl, and I have a hormone imbalance that causes me to have a lot of hair and a deep voice. I guess my dress didn't give him a clue. FML
Today, my dad got drunk and asked if I had inherited his "abnormally tiny penis." FML
Today, I talked to my father for the first time in several years. I proudly told him that I have been attending Beauty School. He looked me up and down and said, "Doesn't look like you've learned much." FML
Today, I walked into the kitchen to find my father trimming his pubes over the bin with our kitchen scissors. FML
Today, I went to pick up my daughter from my dad's house. He'd shaved her head bald. "For a laugh." FML
Today, I arrived home, having just had my long hair cut and my beard shaved. My idiot daughter’s reaction when she saw me? “Who are you and how did you get in the house?” FML
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Top comments
Zman2017 18
The name! He's kinda right though
CallMeWindSock 24
Or she's envious of penises.
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Comments (75)
vikky538 29
as long as the hair grows back and you are ready for new hairstyle..it doesn't matter
megadki14 6
is your dad a psychologist? that is still so funny
Kekslama 5
dont get it.
iwadasn 33
Her father is suggesting that the only reason she cut her hair short is that she subconsciously wishes she were a boy.
VittorioCarter 8
He was probably joking don't dwell on it :)
LittleRed79 39
I had hair halfway down my back and recently had it all cut off into a super short pixie. Everyone I knew told me repeatedly not to do it before I did. Then all the same people told me how much they LOVE this cut on me. It really does all depend on your face shape...and how much stock you keep in what others think of your appearance. If you love it, rock it OP! ;)
Entovarian 4
BWAHAHA! So owned, and it will grow back eventually. But still, FYL.
DrHothead 15
He is definitely right