Today, I turned 18. My parents remembered that I loved German chocolate cake, so I awoke to a hot, fudge-filled chocolate cake with a slice cut out just for me. I've been lactose-intolerant for 8 years. As I cried, my mom handed me tissues, while eating the "Happy" part of my cake. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my parents brought me an ice cream birthday cake. I would think after 23 years they would remember my lactose intolerance. FML
Today, it was my birthday. My only birthday present was a cake that my dad bought from Walmart. Well, it sure looked tasty. The only problem: it had nuts on it. Guess what I'm highly allergic too? At least my dad told me he'd "tell me how it tastes." FML
Today, my mother turned up drunk at my house with a chocolate cake for my 14th birthday. I'm 27, I haven’t seen her in 6 years, I'm allergic to chocolate, and when she saw that I had 2 kids, she wanted to know why I'd bothered, since kids are always "such a disappointment". FML
Today, my mom told me she is serving lasagna and Italian cream cake at my bridal shower. I'm severely lactose intolerant, which I have been telling her for years. She responded by telling me, and I quote, "The food is for the guests." FML
Today, my mother in-law made dessert. It was a beautiful chocolate cake, chocolate cookies, and every other thing had chocolate in it. I'm deathly allergic to chocolate and she knows this. FML
Today, it was my 17th birthday. I didn't want my family to spend money on a cake, so my dad made this delicious apple ring. At least, it was great until my mouth began to itch and my throat closed. I have been allergic to nuts since birth, and my dad put walnuts in my birthday cake. FML
Today, it's my 18th birthday. Last month was my best friend's 18th birthday. She spent the night with me, and the next morning, my mom and brother gathered in my room and sang "Happy Birthday" as they handed her pancakes with a candle on top. Today, I was woken up by screams to take the trash out. FML
Today, I turned eighteen. Thinking I was going to get a big present from my parents on this special day, I eagerly unwrapped my present. They got me a bag of M and M's. Last year I got flannel bed sheets. FML
Today, I woke up early and spent hours baking and icing a three-tier cake for my friend's eighteenth birthday, which is this evening. I just found out my mother threw it in the compost bin because she's on a diet and it was "tempting" her. FML
Today, my family surprised me for my birthday by showing up with a chocolate cake and my ex-boyfriend from back home. They all forgot I'm allergic to chocolate, that I broke up with him about a year ago, and that he’s been trying to win me back ever since. FML
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Top comments
chippa 24
OP discovered a cake that they fell madly in love with 8 or more years ago. 8 years ago, they could no longer have this cake or anything else containing dairy products. Today is their 18th birthday. Their family made OP the previously mentioned cake that OP has not been able to eat for 8 years and still cannot eat. OP cried because they can't eat this delicious birthday cake and evidently, their family doesn't know her very well. OP's mom ate a piece of the cake which had a smiley face or something on it. Do you get it now? It's not that hard to understand...
chippa 24
Dude, who cares about the aftermath, eat it anyway.
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Comments (206)
mistyshaiah 3
So, yes German chocolate cake has milk in it, however, lactose intolerance doesn't work quite like that. The milk is cooked, which changes the lactose making it digestible for those who are intolerant (this does NOT work with cheese). If this were an allergy, instead of an intolerance, then anything with milk, no matter what state it's in, would cause a reaction. At least that's my personal experience (backed up by my doctor). side note... lactose intolerance probiotics help way better than stuff like Lactaid, and you take it once a day. *shrug*
TotalPandamonium 2
I do a lot of baking and frosting tends to have milk in it as well. My son was lactose intolerant for a year and none of the pills worked for him. I just had to make sure that he avoided actual milk products. Even frosting was enough to give him cramps and diarrhea. I ended up having to use soy milk so that he could have a dessert he could eat at family functions.
mistyshaiah 3
Hmm. Maybe I'm one of the "lucky ones" when it comes to what I can get away with milk wise. I was posting my experience since sometimes people don't realize there are often alternative options. Being intolerant to anything sucks, I definitely didn't want to downplay that. *shrug* Thank you for sharing that btw :)
Vitamin_C 0
everyone is different. For me, milk in any state is absolutely horrendous, whereas I can take some amounts of cheese. Also, stress and too much experimenting with milk products seems to make it worse, so not having any dairy for a while usually means that I can then sneak in the odd slice of pizza without taking pills.. You start to learn what sets you off. OP: Put on your big girl panties and stop being a pansy
chokeabitch 0
somebody with a brain and understanding of diet. <claps>
daltonromanowski 11
You cried over cake? You're pathetic.
Hoplaka 0
C'mon man! I've been lactose and tolerant ever since I was 2 and I'm currently in the bathroom on an airplane that has GREAT wifi from that delicous Hersheys bar I ate. ;] <3
askantik 4
Um, make a vegan German chocolate cake? It's easy as hell and still good.
skyeyez9 25
At least you dont have my predicament: I am allergic to peanuts, soy, hazelnuts, pecans, tomatoes, kiwi, nectarines, melons, every damn tree, grass, mold, cats and dogs, and a bunch of other shit that's too much to mention. I have to screen every food for hidden peanut and soy product before I eat it.
evilplatypus 39
You think that's bad? My cousin is allergic to protein (methidilonic acidemia...I know it's spelled wrong). About the only thing she can eat is jello.
KylaaKatastrophe 0
Ohh myy, you're allergic to kiwi?? FYL...
SOILEDIT 51
My prayers go out to you my friend!
Theblue_fml 0
You must've been born without a penis!!!
rightsaidred 3
Since the OP is FEMALE, yes, she probably was.
Theblue_fml 0
That's what I was implying stupid -.-
Gameguy602 0
@141 then it was either a bad joke, or sexist. Either could explain why your comment was down voted.
IIFoxII 0
who the **** cries over cake ? how sad
Spleenfull1334 0
Oh come on people, I'm sure many people here would bitch if they couldn't have their favorite food/cake on their birthday. And her parents eating it right in front of her is just cruel. So what if you wouldn't cry over it? OP did, so I'd have to say to deal with it. And to all the people who are saying to take the pills, what if it doesn't work for her?
MetalFish 0
for my 18th AND 19th I didn't even get a cake. for my 19th my mum and dad were on holiday leaving me at home with my older bro. it didn't bother me because I'm not a little bitch. I don't DO anything anyway, I was the one who told my parents to go on holiday because they wouldn't go over my birthday. sane with Christmas, just another day to me.
Spleenfull1334 0
Well I'm sorry to hear that MetalFish, nice name by the way. xD But, it's OP, and her life is different from yours, of course. I just get annoyed when people act like they've never done something like that in their lives. Or when people act plain rude and ignorant. But I mean no offense or anything along those lines.
MetalFish 0
thank you :p and don't be "sorry to hear that"! it's how I want it!! perhaps o don't lime being in the spotlight for parties etc... on SOME level I can relate to OP, I HATE mushrooms but my Dad always forgets and he adds them to every dinner D: it annoys me... not exactly something to cry over though :p
MetalFish 0
also, this iPods keyboard fails D:
Spleenfull1334 0
You're welcome, hahaha. Ah, I know what you mean. Some people just want their lives that way. I want it that way as well to be honest, I'm not the biggest fan of attention; specially at parties. I guess some people are meant to be like that, eh? Yeah, parents can be very forgetful at times when it comes to many things.
Spleenfull1334 0
Gah, I know right? And it lags so much as well.
MetalFish 0
and I swear I typed out a comment... I think we need an App update AND a site update.
Spleenfull1334 0
Ah its fine, this site is also known for its wonderful comment bugs as well.
bonezowns 0
how can you gain lactose intolerance?
abadilla209 0
WTF!!!