Today, I tried on the new dress I bought for myself. I, for once, thought I looked pretty all right. I asked my dog, "How do I look?" and she threw up on my pillow. My brother can't stop laughing. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was changing my clothes with my dog in the room. As I took off my shirt, he looked at me, ran into the corner, and threw up. Well that's a confidence booster. FML
Today, I was having a playful fight with my brother. I made the point that our dog likes me better than him. To this, my dog jumped onto the sofa, turned to me and vomited on my face. FML
Today, I ran out of the house after my dog, tripped and knocked myself out on the railing by the front step. I woke up to my little brother lifting up the back of my dress for the neighborhood to see. FML
Today, I bought an expensive dress because it was me and my boyfriend's one year anniversary, and he was taking me somewhere nice. When he saw me in the dress, he looked at me, laughed and said, "Seriously, what are you wearing?" FML
Today, I bought a nice new dress for a work party, but when I went to it, a coworker hurried me into the bathroom saying, "Don't worry we can fix this." She thought someone had been sick on me. Thanks. That was just the pattern of the dress. FML
Today, my brother joked that our dog was more attractive than I was. I looked to my mom for support, and she said "Well, she is pure bred." FML
Today, my wife asked me if she looked cute in a new dress that she bought earlier today. I told her that she almost looks like a supermodel. Appearantly "almost" doesn't cut it. Guess who's sleeping on the couch. FML
Be careful what you wish for…
Today, I caught my husband trying on the sexy bra I bought to wear just for him. For shits and giggles, I made him try on my dress too. He looked better in it than I do. FML
Today, I noticed that my dog was feeling sad. I let him hop on my bed with me to make him feel better. It worked, right after he vomited all over my face and pillow. FML
Today, I finally found a cute dress that hugged my curves and hid my imperfections. I wore it to my friend's house, and was feeling pretty good about myself, until some pregnant woman walked into the room wearing the exact same thing. It was a maternity dress. FML
Top comments
Jimboom 12
Don't feel too bad. Dogs fashion senses are outdated.. I mean they are still wearing fur.. thats so 1900's!
DocBastard 40
And when you need help with your homework, I presume you ask the cat? For financial advice, you turn to your stuffed bear?
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Comments (91)
jonny2x4 0
You can always count on your pet to give you an honest opinion.
Waffle817 0
I love Ed Edd n Eddy
Judus_beej 0
I laughed so hard I threw up!
mouxouxou 11
The next time don't take the chance on asking anyone. :P Make it sure that u are pretty that's what matters:) 13-You don't have to be rude.We get it,u are ''realistic''.
stinkmuffin69 0
wow you must look like shiit!
AlexBuda 0
YOUR BEAUTIFUL, YOUR BEAUTIFUL, YOUR BEAUTIFUL its not true!
Alleged_Cranium 7
Never ask for an opinion if you are not prepared to accept the answer.
ShallowWerewolf 0
Exactly and I'm lovin the Johnny Cash pic haha. =]
Petawhitney 2
Maybe, instead of working on your pathetic looks, you should brush up on your rules of grammar.
cutecandykitten 0
your right !
Judus_beej 0
you look like Sarah Polly ;)
sk8erd 15
uhh possibly ur dog ate somethin bad the other day and had to throw up anyway. this is suppose to make you feel better
madasmercury 0
Hopefully your dog isn't seriously ill! Poor thing :(