Today, I took my friend with me for a radiology scan. While I was getting injections, my friend muttered, "On the bright side, if you die, you'll glow in the dark at the funeral." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I overheard someone at the mall telling his friend, "So I'm going in for a brain scan." Trying to be funny, I piped up, "Better hope they find something!" Turns out that had been the end of his sentence, and the scan is to see if his cancer has spread. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend about how a few years ago I had cancer, and how I underwent radiation therapy. His response? "Did you glow in the dark?" FML
Today, I took my best friend to see her dad in hospital. While they were talking in another room about his care, he took his last lucid words before his death. I was the only one there and I'd never even met him before. FML
Today, I had to get bloodwork done. I'm deathly afraid of needles. The whole lobby heard me scream as soon as the nurse said 'hello'. FML
Today, my needle-phobic mother took me to get a shot. She fainted. FML
Today, my buddy told me he was going to get an HIV test at the health department. Without thinking, I told him to "think positive". FML
Today, I went to the hospital for a scan. The tech went wide-eyed and stared at his screen in horror before realizing I could see him. He wouldn't tell me what he saw, apparently only my doctor is allowed to do that. So now I have to wait for god knows how long to get my results back. FML
Today, I attended the funeral of a close friend. Most of the other guests were openly grinning and joking around, and the guy in front of me kept muttering, "That's what she said!" during the eulogy. FML
Today, I learned I'm claustrophobic by having a raging oh-god-I'm-gonna-fucking-die panic attack while I was stuck inside an MRI scanner. FML
Today, my friend had to leave work early for a funeral. As he was on his way out, I wanted to say something. All I could think of was, "Have fun!" FML
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Top comments
iwabo 9
bright side: there's a chance you become a super hero.
hidinginthesky 0
Well it will be bright if you'll be glowing... Get it? Bright side? :P
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Comments (120)
iwabo 9
bright side: there's a chance you become a super hero.
StoryOfTheYear 15
^Lol @ picture relevancy
LiveLaughFML 10
that's the kind of friend who wouldn't bail you out of jail but instead be sitting next to you in the cell :-)
XxREXxX 0
yeah, the human glow stick! fighting crime in gotham city!
CareFace 16
That was batman... Glow stick girl came from Rave City...
IronMaiden45 0
1- captain America ftw
XxREXxX 0
oops your right, dont worry im making a comic book right now
XxREXxX 0
oh and the human glow stick nemesis is slim shady
Mean_Mr_Mustard 9
21- Actually, that's the type of friend who would do something illegal and try to pressure you into doing it too. When you refuse, they do it anyway. Later when the cops show up they bail leaving you to take the fall and still not not bail you out of jail.
DrDilllonReese 12
True friends are overrated... They're only there for you and whatnot
minasrulz69 0
-51, STFU
Mean_Mr_Mustard 9
67- You really think a loyal friend would tell you while your having radioactive material jammed in your arm that at least if you die you will glow in the dark at your funeral? If he was the guy who would be in jail with you then he would be sitting right next to you saying shoot me up too, you die I die we are in this together, man. I would appreciate that over at least you will glow in the dark at your funeral.
bfsd42 20
Wow. Wow. Wow. This is considered an fml and you are all backing op???? Why is it an fml? Be realistic people. Op can't take a joke. It's an fml for op's friend cos her friend can't take a joke. Shame on all of you.
StoryOfTheYear 15
74- I would give my life for my best friend and I would say something like this. He'd more than likely laugh. If not he would at least expect something like that from me.
Pendragon525 0
Sometimes, laughter really is the best medicine. I wonder if OP's friend was trying to cheer him up? Or he was nervous and didn't know what to say. Probably a combination of the two. My close friends joke about my illness with me sometimes...it helps, on those days you either laugh or you cry. I'll choose laughter practically every time...
ihasbrains 10
On the dark side, beauty will never be a light-switch away for OP. :(
Mean_Mr_Mustard 9
I understand what OP's friend was trying to do, but if you're going to make a joke like that wait until after the thing that could potentially kill him/her has finished being inserted into his/her body. Take him/her out to lunch that way the atmosphere would be lighter and the joke will be more easily perceived verses in the doctors office where the mood is somber and the wound is still fresh. Obviously OP didn't take the attempt of a joke well otherwise it wouldn't be an FML.
John808 0
95- you take jokes way too seriously, If the OP had a friend who told them that then I would think they didn't take offense but instead laughed, and posting it here is being sarcastic
John808 0
plus I would love a friend who would try to make me laugh, when I have to go though something like that
rkmepm 16
i see what u did there!
hidinginthesky 0
Well it will be bright if you'll be glowing... Get it? Bright side? :P
EvilPotato 15
2 no I don't get it, help me understand.
ahawk 2
Not funny! js :p
billigoat 8
Now there's a lifelong friend right there!
BadAsCactus 7
Ba, dom, tss
konstantinos616 17
On the bright side, if you live long enough you can kick your friend in the privates
colecola12 0
Are you 10 years old?
CryMoreFMLs 15
Maybe if YOU are lucky, you'll live long enough to gain some intelligence.
konstantinos616 17
What? It's what I would've done
Unlucky_Gun 0
Wait, number 3 get some intelligence? When your the one who can't recognize a joke cause you take everything so literally? Okay there, get real moron
saIty 17
Or you'll get superpowers. If you're lucky x-ray vision. *wink*wink* *nudge*nudge*
Luke1717 0
Ha, the *wink*wink* and *nudge*nudge* made it that much better
bfsd42 20
Say no more, say no more.
Zepset_fml 13
I already like your friend.
Llama_Face89 34
If I have to go out...at least I'll be remembered... Liam of the Glowing Corpse. Kinda catchy.
ikickgingers 15
Liam? :/
Llama_Face89 34
15- that would be my name, yes.
maddylovesu 5
True friends are like that.
saIty 17
I may have posted this on the old board, chow if necessary. FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink. BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food. FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa. BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS! FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail. BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin "DAMN!" we ****** up! FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry. BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when you're not down anymore. FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number. BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial. FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back. BEST FRIENDS: Loses your shit and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue." FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing. BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door. BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME." FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough. BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say "Bitch drink the rest of that ! You know we don't waste!
Ferretface 13
25- I would thumb you down, but you're comment is too long...
OasC82 0
I'd thumb it
perdix 31
"On the bright side, if I die, I'll be free from your inane prattle until you join me in hell."
Luke1717 0
You never cease to amaze me with your comments.
jadengtfo 0
I wouldn't mind a glow in the dark funeral....
TipsyHobo 7
No joke, rave that shit up, eh? Lmao
megapeyt 17
Hey no need for a night lamp!