Today, I told my long-distance friend about the flooding in Florida due to the Supermoon. He's a Flat Earther and despite proof, denies the coincidence because he believes the moon and gravity aren't what we're taught. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I had to explain to my husband that the Earth is not flat. He didn’t believe me. FML
Sounds like a keeper
Today, I went on a date with a guy who seemed really nice. However, halfway through the date, he started talking about how he was a flat-earther, and believed that the moon landing was faked. Oh, and that birds aren't real. I had to endure another hour of his conspiracy theories before I could finally escape. FML
Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend that a tornado is not the same thing as a hurricane. I couldn't convince him, and he still won't talk to me. FML
Globehead
Today, I found out my girlfriend of 3 years actually believes that the Earth is flat. FML
Let people believe
Today, I told a friend I had become more religious lately. He immediately started mocking me for being a "stupid creationist bigot." When I told him how offensive that was, he acted bewildered and started condescendingly lecturing me about how "science has proven God does not exist." FML
Today, I found out that one of my colleagues believes that aliens built the pyramids. No amount of logical reasoning or evidence has had any effect on his argument of, "but you can't prove they didn't." FML
Today, I finally got to see my favorite aunt after months of her living far away with her new boyfriend. She now believes the Earth is flat, gravity is fake, the government is run by reptiles, and that vaccines are the devil themselves. She won't stop trying to convince me of her conspiracies. FML
Oh no…
Today, I was telling my girlfriend about how my parents are flying out to Japan today on vacation. She was shocked at how short the flight will be, because "It's on the other side of the world." We live in the USA, and it seems I'm dating a Flat Earther. FML
Today, my mom saw a picture of the moon and asked me what "those big spots" were. She actually thought the craters were continents and tried correcting me when I told her what they were. Then I almost got into trouble for being disrespectful. FML
Could it be possible…?
Today, two of my friends condemned me for being "narrow-minded", because I couldn't help but laugh at the thought that someone would believe mermaids actually exist. FML
Top comments
potatocouch 16
What an idiot, if he was smart he would know the world is a cube.
Talis99 26
It literally boggles my mind how folks can be this thick-headed. All the evidence, all the science--do they need to be strapped into a rocket and shot into space themselves?
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Comments (102)
SlugsOnDrugs 13
This isn't really an FML on your part as much as it is on theirs. They're going to struggle later in life when these misbeliefs bite them in the butt.
Levvy 22
One day the poor guy is going to see a mountain from far enough away that the curvature of the earth prevents him from seeing the base of it, and his head's going to explode trying to come up with an explanation of how that could work on a flat plane.
potatocouch 16
What an idiot, if he was smart he would know the world is a cube.
Levvy 22
Au contraire. It's TIME that is a cube! Actually, I think that website argued the Earth itself was too in some weird roundabout way, come to think of it.
Lalala579121 28
A companion cube.
howdmynosego 12
Thanks Obama
Dramori 29
Liar. It's actually a delicious cake with a moist centre.
Talis99 26
It literally boggles my mind how folks can be this thick-headed. All the evidence, all the science--do they need to be strapped into a rocket and shot into space themselves?
Oozle97 23
Honestly, I've always wanted to set up a program like this specifically for those types of people, just to prove to them the science is correct.
katachristic 19
Ask them how it is that people can fly planes in one direction continuously and eventually up at the same spot. It's not an overly technical argument and the only (non-technical) counterargument is that literally all the planes got turned around some point or are lying
DanielleinDC 34
I don't know where OP's friend lives, but if it's anywhere else in the U.S., it's quite possible he was educated in a state where people think kids should learn about creationism in science class.
JinxTheQueen 16
What does that have to do with it? Creationism doesn't teach that the earth is flat. The earth is round still.
TheFireEternal 26
Honestly though if a program was ever set up to prove people like this wrong, I'd also say the world was flat. Free ride into space.
flamingarrow59 21
They'll say it was a simulation or something so even that wouldnt be enought
Misguided_Wrath 12
was thinkin the same thing!
MashaV 6
You know, this might be a marketable idea. The friends and family of the flat-earthers would sponsor a "re-education trip to space" to save their loved ones from stupidity.
pooniels 5
Creationism doesn't teach that the earth is flat? Are you sure, have you tried listening to what those asshats actually say? I guess it's true that creationism literally doesn't *teach* anything, but instead spreads lies and deliberate ignorance. But this doesn't change the fact that flat-earth creationism is a thing, and that approximately 100% of ALL flat-earthers ARE creationists...
zeeba_neighba 10
Great idea! A one way trip, of course.
Justy101 23
@27 Despite not being a Christian myself, I was brought up in a very Christian home and even did a few years of home schooling through a Christian program. Creationism DOES NOT teach flat earth theory. I have never come across flat earth theory in any creationist teachings. It's a very small niche of some crazy people who have taken parts of the Bible out of context to suit their own theory and certainly does not reflect the beliefs of a vast majority of christians.
work_while_bent 13
one way. preferably.
Soninuva 41
@27: 100% of squares are rectangles, that doesn't mean that all rectangles are square. Your argument is a fallacy. It seems to me that other than the flat-Earthers, you're the only one spreading ignorance.
sturschaedel 27
#19, exactly! My first thought when I read it was: why spend all that money and rocket fuel on ignorant idiots, "I" want to go to space!!! The only valid "flat earth" is the Discworld. I mean, the elephants supporting on Great A-Tuin it even lift their legs to let the sun pass!
pooniels 5
Funny how everyone goes straight into denial mode without even addressing what I said; have I actually found some creationists here or are you just defending those nutcases for some odd reason? I've never claimed all creationists are flat-earthers, which #55 even admits, but then you still follow up with the #yesall creationists straw man?! 100% of squares are still rectangles. Creationists are some of the most infamous science-deniers in the world, denying the big bang, evolution, heliocentrism, the age of the earth, the age of the universe, tectonics and more including, whether you like it or not, the sphere earth. Obviously. Why would you be so sure people that dismiss/deny entire chunks or even all of astronomy, physics, chemistry, biology, mathematics, geology, metrology, anthropology and more (effectively ALL of science) would stop at the shape of the earth? You'd be surprised how popular the flat-earth society is, especially in the US... that also has a % of creationists >twice that of any other country in the first world with the single exception of... accused ISIS supporter Turkey. it's well-known that "regular" creationists like to distantiate themselves from the flat-earth creationists that share their ideology but deny just a tiny bit more science. Of the many flat-earthers I've talked to many immediately and proudly identified as creationists, but NONE of them has EVER disagreed with creationism. Only some of the creationists I've met were deep enough into science denial to think the world is flat. So instead of straw-manning me and just denying something I've never claimed, why not prove me wrong, hmm? Can you creationist-(defender)s even name a SINGLE flat-earther that's not a creationist?
JinxTheQueen 16
Actually #78 I went to a Christian college and studied Microbiology. We are taught about evolution and the Big Bang and how there is the possibility that an event of creative evolution happened. I also never said "All creationists" I merely stated Creationism does not teach flat earth theory. Now kindly remove your head from your ass. Thank you.
SZamir 7
I was taught creationism in school (I studied at an Islamic school). Nowhere did we learn that the earth was flat. In fact our teachers made it a point to emphasize that the Earth was sort of egg-shaped, and last time I checked, eggs weren't flat. Where are you getting your information from?
pooniels 5
Good job on destroying that straw man about creationists being flat earthers an all but... I guess this means you cannot contest the only claim I made, namely that apparently the only people ignorant and delusional enough to that think the world is flat are *some* creationists... And if you disagree, I'm still waiting for you to name even ONE flat earther that's not a creationists, as I've never even heard of a single one.
IorvethTheXolo 8
I grew up going to those schools all my life and they most definitely teach that the world is round.
Enslaved 38
For all of you arguing about creationism. FYI you don't need to believe the earth is flat if you believe in creation HOWEVER the people that are flat earther believe in the creation myth because the Bible talks about the firmament. Hope that settles it!
wheresmymary 22
What a dumbass
Tripartita 45
Whatever, OP. Just keep drinking the Kool-Aid like everybody else. While you do that, the Round Earth Tycoons make millions off our collective ignorance. They harness our brainwaves (specifically those generated when we imagine Earth spinning) and sell the energy to… terrorists… or something.
acmariner99 25
I saw your inspiration on the internet so it must be true! Abraham Lincoln said so!
Yarecho 14
Oh we got another Christopher Columbus here?
xcllla_ 27
Everyone knows that the world is flat, and resting on the backs of four elephants who, in turn, stand upon the back of a giant, space-faring turtle.
evilplatypus 39
I thought that said "space-farting"… I think it's time to go to bed.
sturschaedel 27
And the thaumic field slows the light down to the speed of sound!
RichardPencil 32
With hundreds of people going into space and seeing the round planet from above, I can't believe we have idiots like this around.
cupcakebruh 21
There's a lot of people who believe it's all just a huge conspiracy, and that we've never been to space, or the moon, and those pictures of the earth from space are photo-shopped. Btw, I'm not one of those people, I just find conspiracy theories interesting.
RichardPencil 32
I can see when only three guys went to the moon that you could believe that such a conspiracy is plausible, but with hundreds of people going up to the space station, it's impossible that no one has leaked the fraud. Plus, you can see the space station orbiting the earth.
IorvethTheXolo 8
There are also people who believe that dinosaur bones were placed in the ground by God or Satan or whoever to test people's faith... Stupidity knows no bounds, my friend.
Sayeret_Matkal 18
If the earth is round how come we got four corners?
OhPuhleeze 23
Do you really want to mix your genes with his? If yes, why post this? If no, why is he long distance boyfriend and not ex boyfriend already?
RayneSmytson 24
I think you misread. It says "friend" not "boyfriend". Big difference.
OhPuhleeze 23
Oh, I did misread that...
cupcakebruh 21
It's okay, I read "boyfriend" at first too