Today, I told my friend I was considering adopting a dog. She looked at me like I was Satan and went on a rant about how dogs are "born evil" and will always maul someone given the chance. I still have the marks from when one of her psycho cats sliced open my arm last month. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Countersuit
Today, as I was walking my dog, some self-righteous animal activist berated me on how it was animal abuse to put my dog on a leash. Despite warning her, she crouched down to undo it, my dog charged at her, giving her a gash on the cheek. She kicked my dog for it, and is now threatening to sue me. FML
Good boy
Today, after a serious argument with my friend about how his dog seems to hate me for no reason, I decided that it's my responsibility to show his dog that I mean no harm. I started off by giving him his favorite treat. He got excited and practically inhaled it… then started barking at me again. FML
Dog people
Today, a crazed woman started screaming at me at the dog park. She was saying that I was cruel and unfit to be a pet owner, and she ought to kick my ass. My dog's ears and tail were cropped before I even got him. He’s a rescue and came to me like this. She wouldn’t listen and followed me to my car. FML
Great friends
Today, my "friends" showed me a video of them pranking my arachnophobic coworker with a fake toy spider. She cried. I told them very bluntly that they're horrible people and owe her an apology. They responded by getting their mean ass dog to antagonize me. I'm afraid of dogs. FML
Cujo
Today, I have cynophobia. My dog-loving friend refuses to acknowledge that it's real. Her dogs are vicious and mean, and she believes it is cruel to muzzle them. Not to mention they're almost the size of me, and I'm 6'2 and 220lbs. This is literally why I have cynophobia in the first place. FML
Rescue me
Today, my mum has a rescue dog who grew up in a cage and, even after 18 months of love & stability, is still extremely loud and aggressive. So, bottom line, she ruined not only her own life, but also her partner’s, her cats’, mine, and the neighbours’, all so that ONE little arsehole canine can have a nice life. FML
Every dog has its day
Today, I had to very seriously and very slowly explain to my friend why having a bat mitzvah for her dog was a very ignorant and insulting idea. FML
Tonight we're gonna party like it's 1999
Today, I found out why my mother has treated me like dogshit since the day I was born. I was apparently born during a solar eclipse, which in her twisted mind meant I was born evil, with a black soul. I train dogs for blind people, yet she insists I must have a sinister motive even for that. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I started fighting. Instead of arguing for herself, she decided to set her puppy on me. Only "Puppy" is the name of her fully-grown police-trained German Shepherd. FML
Social parasites
Today, I was walking my friend’s dog at the park as a favor. A stranger then struck up a little conversation with me about the dog. It turned out that the stranger I talked to was my friend’s landlord, who now knows that my friend was lying about her pet being a service animal and is threatening eviction. FML
Top comments
igive 29
If treated right, dogs are the most loyal and loving creatures, don't listen to her.
MrConfusion 21
The only bad dogs are the ones raised bad. I love dogs and currently own two. Don't listen to her OP, and if you want to adopt a dog, I highly suggest it. Happy adopting :)
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Comments (88)
8djht8 19
Get a dog train it properly prove her wrong
Norja 33
I don't trust people who don't like dogs
Timber147 9
Ever thought about getting a new friend? Dogs are the most loving and loyal friend you'll ever have.
rec_chem 22
She's right. Not that cats are better...
doglady 16
With kindness and training, nearly all dogs can be taught what behavior is OK and what is not. Whoever says money can't buy happiness never paid a pet adoption fee. Rescued dogs will be your friend forever and love you unconditionally. They are silliness and joy and devotion. Good on you for adopting, not buying.
baubsmith 6
get the dog, and feed it the cat
SolidSteak 5
Why do you tolerate having a psychopath in your life?
Mailesmiles 2
Get rid of her, you don't need that type of negativity in your life
MrNightmare 8
I'm just saying I hate cats with a burning passion I cannot explain.